Voulezvous Me Rencontrer?
by Snarfburgalar
Summary: Kagome lives in New York.She is lonely and apprehensive after being dismissed by her fiancé just months before the wedding.But love is waiting for her where she least suspects.LANGUAGE
1. I Should Have Known Better

Now listen up sugar plums, we have some business to take care of. This is my fifth story out right now, and I'm quite proud of it, and naturally I want other people to be proud of it too, but I understand that everyone is entitled to their own opinions. All the same, I'm giving you fair warning,  
  
IF THE IDEA OF A GAY INUYASHA DISGUSTS YOU, TURN BACK NOW.   
  
Now before we get things started, this is a whatchamacallit, an alternate universe fic. Set in New York. Tons of fun. Before we get this show on the road, we'll do the disclaimer.  
  
I DO NOT OWN INUYASHA. I DON'T OWN ASPIRIN, I DON'T OWN JACK DANIELS. I DON'T OWN NEW YORK EITHER. THANK YOU.  
  
***  
  
Chapter One-I Should Have Known Better  
  
***  
  
I should have known better. It had all been too good to be true. There was no way in hell that I, Kagome Higurashi, could have ever reeled in such a catch. There was just no way. The whole confrontation was a week behind me, but it was still fresh in my mind. Everyday I woke up (assuming I had slept at all) and it felt like yesterday, or if I happened to be in denial, a bad dream. Every morning and every night I buried my nose in my pillow and cried.  
  
I was so upset, I even made Inuyasha sleep with me. The days wore on, and being the stupid person that I was, I had tried during the first few to get up and try to piece my life back together. What a splendid disaster that was.  
  
I distinctly remember the day that I broke into tears at work. I remember how Riba had pulled me into the back room with a little bustle of co-workers in tow. Surrounded by women who were anywhere from twenty to thirty years older than me, with the exception of Jordan, I gushed my whole story out and only felt worse when they cooed and comforted me. I mean really, I am such a spoiled little crybaby bitch. Is it all really that bad that I have to concern perfectly good people with my problems?  
  
Yes it is.  
  
Inuyasha muttered in his sleep beside me, and I turned over to look at his face. I realized with a start of anger that the little bitch had been wearing my fucking Chanel lip gloss, and my heart broke as I saw the sixty dollar material smeared horizontally across his face. My grief was quickly replaced by that for my sheets, which were no doubt ruined by now. I was ready to rip the covers off of him and roll him out, when I remembered how he had sacrificed many a good evening on my account, just to sit around on the couch and eat ice cream with me while I felt sorry for myself. That was another thing, he had skipped out on his diet for me.  
  
I smiled, despite my rising headache from drinking myself to sleep the night before; although I was still rather pissed that he had borrowed my make-up. Again. Looking on the bright side, I suppose I should have been glad that he had returned home at all. Last night had been his first club night in a week, the poor baby was deprived, and I hadn't expected him to be back until at least the following Thursday.  
  
His eyes suddenly fluttered open, and he moaned and flipped around. I flopped over him. "Come on princess, it's time to get up."  
  
"Leave me alone."  
  
"Well aren't we pleasant this morning? Did you see any cute guys?"  
  
"Several, but leave me the hell alone or I'll never tell you anything about any of them."  
  
I grinned impishly and touched his cheek. "Wake up and tell me and I might forget about how you borrowed my Chanel lip gloss."  
  
"And I might forget about how you have made me stay home every night for the past week."  
  
It got real quiet, real fast. I didn't readjust my position, which was at that moment my whole torso hanging over his waist as he lay on his side, but I turned my head away and let my hair cover my eyes.  
  
"Kagome, hey, I'm sorry..."  
  
"No, you don't have to be sorry. You're right." I felt the tears welling up in my eyes. If I cried it would be just the most pathetic thing in the world. Well, I had been on a roll for the past seven days, couldn't stop now.  
  
He sat up and wrapped his arms around me. "Hey sweetie, come on, I didn't mean it..." I started to sob. "Shh shh...Baby it's alright..."  
  
"No it isn't! I-I just..."  
  
"Shhh... Come on Kagome, let's sleep some more."  
  
The bed had picked this particular morning to become indescribably comfortable. And facing a long day in a stuffy office with a hangover didn't sound too appealing. I sniffed and my tears slowed a bit.  
  
"But...but I have to go to work."  
  
"Skip today. They won't miss you. I'm sure Riba will fill in for you."  
  
There it was again. People bending over backwards just for me. It sucked.  
  
I sniffed again and found myself lying down, curled up next to Inuyasha. He was rocking us back and forth soothingly. I wrapped my hands up in his long silvery hair. "It's unfair..." I whispered.  
  
"Yeah I know, but it's okay. Go to sleep."  
  
He has the strangest philosophies sometimes. I didn't see how on earth it could possibly be "okay" but when it came from him, I wanted to believe it so much that I gave in within seconds. Inuyasha could be inconsiderate, but only when he wanted to. Otherwise, it was simply a natural talent of his that he could say just the right thing at just the right time.  
  
***  
  
Kouga was the best thing that had ever happened to me. He was the light of my life. He made things perfect because he was perfect. I loved everything about him. His cocky attitude, his strange style, his laziness... He was the epitome of everything male, and I was smitten. Inuyasha didn't readily approve of him, and that of course upset me a little bit. And besides, Kouga made it blatantly obvious that he didn't like Inuyasha either, and you can't really be friends with someone who hates you. I guess the thought of me being alone in an apartment with a guy, granted, a homosexual guy, but still a guy, made Kouga a bit nervous. What an angel... But I assured myself that at our wedding Kouga would ease up, and Inuyasha would see just how great we were together.   
  
Our wedding...I twirled on my toes like a complete idiot at the mere thought of the rapidly approaching event, but a complete idiot was not an uncommon sight in New York, so people didn't really notice.  
  
Central Park...How romantic. Kouga always thought of the best places for dates. He was a little late at the moment, but I consoled myself by remembering the way he had spoken to me over the phone the previous night. The urgency in his voice, like a day without seeing me had really been torture for him.  
  
I looked down at my hand and held it up to the sunshine, watching the sun bounce off the neat little diamond set nicely on its gold band. I couldn't help but giggle. In my heart, despite the fact that it was a little sad being away from him for longer periods of time, I was glad that I had agreed with his decision to have us remain in separate apartments until we were officially married. After all, absence makes the heart grow fonder, right?  
  
My watch told me that he was fifteen minutes late. I had to admit that it was a little strange...Kouga wasn't usually late at all. If anything, I was the one who wound up at the restaurant an hour after planned.  
  
Then again, I was jittery and impish in light of the fact that I was actually going to get married, so I dismissed my concern as just that of a devoted wife-to-be.  
  
Fifteen minutes quickly became a half-an-hour, and I started to actually grow worried. I was on the verge of dialing his apartment with my cell phone when I suddenly saw him walking down the little sidewalk-path that ran through the park. I noticed that just behind him, a girl with bright red hair was following, her eyes downcast.  
  
Kouga himself looked a little worse for wear, as if he hadn't gotten much sleep last night. There were dark circles under his eyes and his hair was just a bit more disheveled than usual.  
  
Unable to wait for him to finally reach me where I sat on a bench, I ran to him and promptly threw my arms around his neck. "Kouga! You're late!" My voice was teasing.  
  
He didn't respond, nor did he look like he was intending to do so anytime soon, so I broke the icy silence by turning my head to the young girl and smiling brightly. "And who's this? A relative?"  
  
"You might say that." The girl whispered quietly. Her flaming hair had been tied into two large ponytails on either side of her head. Her eyes were flashing green, and while they looked a little forlorn, they were piercing.  
  
I thought she was adorable at first sight. "Really?! That's so great! I really like your hair, it's lovely."  
  
She sort of half-smiled and muttered thanks under her breath.  
  
After that, the silence grew considerably noticeable again and I sort of fidgeted, as much as I could anyway, with my arms still wrapped around Kouga's neck. "Hey so...um...what's going on?"  
  
Kouga sighed, the first sound I had heard from him the whole time, and carefully lifted my arms off of him, then held my hands together in both of his own and gave me a hard, knowing look. "K-Kouga...? What's wrong?"  
  
"Kagome, I have something to tell you."  
  
I blushed, certainly we couldn't be romantic while his relative, who looked rather young, was standing right there. Aww hell, he was too cute. Screw it. "Yes Kouga?"  
  
"I don't think..." He looked sideways at the girl, and she nodded. "I don't think...we can be together anymore."  
  
My heart dropped out. I went numb. My eyes grew wide as my lips moved silently. Everything was crashing down suddenly, but I was too rigid to register it. Every muscle I had was detached. It was the worst, empty feeling I had ever had. More than grief, more than crushing despair or agony or regret. The absence of...everything. Because Kouga was everything.  
  
"Why?"  
  
"Kagome..." He said after a long time. "This is Ayame. She is...we have been...seeing each other...for a little while." The strange emptiness grew.  
  
"Seeing each other?" I was surprised that I could even speak at all.  
  
"Kagome."  
  
Silence. I felt something coming, everything I had left in me started screaming for me to cover my ears or run or something. This couldn't be real. This couldn't be real, it just wasn't possible. Run...don't listen...  
  
"She's...going to have a baby."  
  
The shock was almost too much, I almost feinted. I should have feinted. Maybe then I would have fallen and smashed my head on the pavement. Instead my knees buckled and I fell backwards onto the nearest bench. My breathing came in short little gasps. Kouga made no move, but his eyes conveyed a look of deep regret. I would be angered by that look later.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I'm so sorry Kagome." He whispered.  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
The strangely absent tears finally began slipping out, but I didn't care. Kouga was quiet again, and I looked to Ayame. Her eyes were resting on me, they looked...guilty or embarrassed, but not necessarily ashamed. I didn't know what I was doing then, but I do know it felt very good. The next thing I knew, my right hand was gripping Ayame's shoulder very firmly. My eyes swimming with tears, I bore my teeth and scowled, fighting all of my chaotic emotions to keep from screaming at her until she was deaf. How was it that this little thing was carrying Kouga's child? How was it that she had the privilege I deserved? How could she even think of touching him...He was in love with me. ME. She looked a bit frightened, and I was glad, but then Kouga dragged me away; wrenching my hand from her shoulder and spinning me around to face him.  
  
"Kagome, please understand that-"  
  
My hand stung, but it was a good stinging. I watched the red mark on his face swell a bit from where my hand had hit it full speed.  
  
"How dare you."  
  
I tore my engagement ring from my finger, the first really good thing I had done besides terrifying Ayame and hitting Kouga with all the strength of a raging female. But this counted. Perhaps this would get through that impossibly thick skull of his.  
  
I stalked, enraged, to the nearby street and stood looking out at the cars as they rushed by for a moment. I think Kouga thought I was about to end my life by walking out into traffic, which was certainly not a bad idea, but I had better things to do at that moment. He ran to me, saying something along the lines of, "wait Kagome", when I held the ring up and gave him the most vicious look of loathing I could pull off while I dropped the little scrap of metal into the gutter. It clattered all the way down into the icy depths below, music to my ears. With a satisfying splash I knew it was being taken away, out of my life forever. But not out of my heart.  
  
Kouga stopped still. There was nothing more to be said.  
  
"Goodbye Kouga."  
  
I walked away. I hated him with every fiber of my being. Him, and Ayame. But I wasn't about to get over the love we had had together so easily. No, the relationship we had built was a very good one. I wouldn't forget it. Not for a week at least. After all, my Kouga was gone...my everything...was gone.  
  
***  
  
I woke up crying.  
  
I had relived that experience many times in my dreams. It was getting easier to bear now that it was a week later, but you know...I was still very upset. I had been engaged, for the first time in my life. I had thought I was in love, I probably had been in love, and there was now no way that I could ever get that love back again.   
  
I realized that Inuyasha was not in bed, and sat up, a salty, crusty, bushy mess of hair and tears. "Inuyasha?" I called weakly.  
  
"You up Kagome? I'm making breakfast." He sounded happy. He was always happy when he was cooking.  
  
"Yeah, I'm up." Sniffling and groggy, with a pounding hangover that was just now really surfacing at its worst from my high alcohol intake the night before, I wandered to the bathroom for some aspirin.  
  
My neck was stiff as I rifled through the contents of the cabinet, being unsuccessful in my search. "Inuyasha? Where's the aspirin?"  
  
"We're out."  
  
"Oh that's fucking great..." I muttered to myself. "I have a massive hangover, can you please run to the drugstore or something?"  
  
"But...the eggs will burn." He called sadly from the kitchen.  
  
After swearing and cursing all egg laying creatures straight to hell, I resolved unhappily that I would have to go without relief at least until after breakfast, unless I wanted to attempt an overdose of some other drug, which was probably not in my best interest. So I dragged my feet to the living room of our spacious apartment and collapsed on the couch.  
  
I stared up at the ceiling wordlessly, too lazy and far too ill-tempered to reach for the remote to turn on the T.V. The fan was swirling over my head; it had been our decision not to get an air-conditioning system, and in the height of the summer season, it was absolutely necessary to circulate as much heat out of the apartment as possible. I wanted the fan to stop though. It was making my steadily growing headache more ferocious.  
  
"Inuyasha..." I mumbled, "I'm turning off the fan."  
  
"Shit, don't do that! It's 95 outside today!"  
  
I cursed. "It's making me dizzy..."  
  
"Then close your eyes. There's no way in hell you're turning off the fan in this weather."  
  
I did as I was told and closed my eyes. Stars burst on my eyelids and the constant swish of the fan blades echoed in my head, calling up the image of it whirling and whirling... "It's not working Inuyasha. I can still hear it."  
  
"Put a pillow over your head then!"  
  
I pinned the nearest fluffy throw pillow over my head and groaned beneath it. This wasn't working either. It was hot, cramped, and stuffy, and I emerged minutes later in even worse condition.  
  
"Dammit...I'm turning off this fucking fan right now or else you're going to have a flaming bitch on your hands."  
  
"Spare me." He leaned out of the kitchen and gave me a withering look. "You're a flaming bitch round the clock. If it's so damn bad then go out and get some aspirin yourself. I am occupied fixing your breakfast."  
  
"You just love any excuse to cook!" I accused venomously, "And do you really think I could handle anything without vomiting right now?!"  
  
He chose to respond by poking his hand around the corner and flipping me off. I countered with a vulgar gesture of my own and dragged myself up. Apparently my time in his good graces had been spent, and I had gone from a tragic break-up victim to another rambling single woman just out of a relationship.  
  
I threw on a shirt over my pajamas, and tossing a few choice words in Inuyasha's general direction, slammed the door shut upon my exit.   
  
As I shuffled down the hall, kicking any unfortunate object that happened to be lingering in my path as I went, I shoved my hands into my pockets and tried to ignore the headache that was growing more fierce by the second.  
  
"Kagome?"  
  
A familiar voice called my name, and I closed my eyes, "Dammit..." Turning around, I quickly replaced my murderous look with one of pleasant affect. "Yes?"  
  
"Hey there!" It was my neighbor, Sango, standing there looking pretty and happy and on top of the world, per usual...Sango was a constant fiery topic of discussion between myself and Inuyasha. She was one of our best friends, but at the same time we hated her guts because she was so perfect. It occurred to me at that moment that talking to this cheerful girl would probably brighten my mood, and she might spare me a trip to the pharmacy by perhaps having some aspirin she had in stock, so I stopped to talk with her.  
  
She approached me, running from her apartment door down the hall, tiny delicate feet tapping quietly on the beige carpet as she went. "Nice to see, you...um...Kagome." She was having difficulty choosing her words, as she was well aware of my recent...mishap. Of course her next statement wasn't so precious, she stopped a few feet away, "Whoa, you look like shit! What happened?"  
  
"Yeah, nice to see you too sweetheart." I muttered sourly.  
  
"Sorry, but really, what happened?" She shifted the strap of her bag on her shoulder, adjusting the load.  
  
I shrugged. "Stayed up late. Had a few drinks. You know, the usual."  
  
"Kagome..." Her voice became warning and firm, "You know you shouldn't try and drink your troubles away. It doesn't help."  
  
"Oh to be sure. I have a massive hangover and I'm regretting every Jack Daniels I ever had."  
  
She put her hands on her hips, "Well then what do you think you're doing up? Get to bed, I don't want you to walk out into traffic or something!"  
  
"It just so happens..." I informed her astutely, " That we are out of aspirin, and Inuyasha intends to feed me breakfast this morning even if he has to personally shove it down my throat. You know how he gets when he's making food..."  
  
"Yeah," she drawled, probably recalling old memories of occasions when Inuyasha would almost become violent over matters in the cooking department. "But even so...I can't have you wandering around looking for meds when you look half-dead. Come on, I'll get you some."  
  
"You have stuff?"  
  
"Nah, but I'll make a run to the drugstore for ya." She winked and smiled, one of her moves.  
  
"Thank you so much...." I held her hands in mine and gave her the sincerest look of gratitude I could summon at the time, which probably turned out to be rather grotesque because she quickly released her hands and led me back to my apartment by the shoulder.  
  
"Now..." She cooed, hand poised on the doorknob, "I'll be back in a little bit. Go get some rest."  
  
I thanked her again as she scooted me through the door. Then she popped her head through the frame and told Inuyasha to take it easy on me. To which he replied, "Feh."  
  
"Sango went to go get aspirin."  
  
"Thought so. She's too nice."  
  
"Oh I know..." I took up my previous roost on the couch again. "It's positively sickening..."  
  
"The eggs are almost done."  
  
"If you repeat the name of any food product to me ever again, ESPECIALLY eggs, I will strangle you with my bare hands."  
  
"Eggs."  
  
I hurried to the bathroom, hand clamped over my mouth.  
  
***  
  
Fifteen minutes and five trips to the bathroom later, I was hunched in a corner, a foot away from the toilet. Ready to rush in should the need arise again to relieve my stomach of what little remained of its contents. Sango knocked on the door timidly. "Kagome? I got the aspirin, you think you can swallow something?"  
  
"Come on in Sango...But don't let Inuyasha in. I may be nearly unconscious but I can still beat the shit out of him." I heard him smirking from the beyond the door.  
  
"Shut up Inuyasha," Sango scolded as she slipped in and flipped the lock as an added precaution.  
  
As she knelt down beside me I shouted, "YEAH, YOU LAUGH NOW BUDDY! BUT WHEN I CAN STAND AGAIN YOUR PRISSY LITTLE ASS IS GOING STRAIGHT TO-"  
  
"Shhh...Kagome, here, take this." She ran some water and offered me a glass, accompanied by a little pill.  
  
"Thanks..." I washed it down, and eased down onto my back, sprawling out as much as the tight little space allowed.  
  
"Are you alright?"  
  
I wanted to bark at her; or at least the part of me that was suffering the most from the headache wanted to. But she was going out of her way, like everybody else, just to help little old me. So needless to say, I bit my tongue. But really, did I look alright? Sheesh. "Yeah Sango," I lied, "I'm fine."  
  
"You sure?"  
  
No. "Yes."  
  
"Listen Kagome, you can talk to me if you need to."  
  
"I know that, thank you Sango."  
  
There was a little pause, and Inuyasha could be heard watching T.V. in the next room.  
  
Nervous that I might be offending her with my short responses, even though it was obvious that I was dazed and ill, I tried to make small conversation. "So how's Miroku?"  
  
"Fine...Fine."  
  
I mentally berated myself, Miroku was a bit of a tender subject for Sango. Everyone around her saw that she was mad for him...Except for Miroku. It was devastatingly sad that the guy was never serious. You could see the disappointment in Sango's eyes whenever he would jokingly feel her up, just for fun, but it was even worse when he would proceed to do the same thing to any attractive female around right in front of her. I couldn't understand how they lived together. If anything it seemed like Miroku treated Sango like a sister. Well, maybe not a sister. I guess she was just that attracted to him.  
  
I quickly changed the subject, "Any word from Kirara?"  
  
"Kirara? Yeah, she's good. She just got a leading role in a big Broadway thing."  
  
"Really? Anything familiar?"  
  
She smiled weakly, "Gigi."  
  
"Gigi? I love Gigi!" Actually, all I had seen of it was the little movie. It was one of Inuyasha's favorites. Seeing him prancing around in the kitchen singing "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" was normal.  
  
"Yeah...It should be good."  
  
"We should all go see it when it comes out. You know, drag along Inuyasha and Miroku and Inuyasha's boyfriend at the time or whatever. It'd be fun."  
  
She sighed, "Uh-huh."  
  
I wanted nothing more than to crawl into the tub and sleep, but I could tell something else was bothering Sango besides my stupid revival of the Miroku thing.  
  
"Something wrong?"  
  
She hesitated. "No."  
  
"Sango, please."  
  
"I, tried to...call Kohaku, the other day."  
  
"..."   
  
Kohaku, her little brother. Cute little scamp, but well...He had made a few bad choices in his day. I had never met him. Sango had pictures all over her apartment. She listened for news of him, she probably prayed for him every night. But things had gotten distant between them after they had moved to New York a few years ago. After the car accident that killed her parents. Kirara was old enough to support her little brother and sister with her promising career in acting just beginning, and despite their tragedy, it looked like they would be able to make the fresh start they had dreamed about. But for Kohaku, the youngest of the three, things were harder. The poor kid was only fourteen when it happened. Coming to New York had been difficult, strange, new...unwelcome. He consoled himself by hanging out with the wrong people. He didn't show up at his sisters' apartment for days at a time, and finally, after a violent night of fighting with his siblings, he ran off to join a gang. Sango and Kirara had done everything in their power to stop him, even phoned the police, but they couldn't do a thing. By then Kohaku had been 18, old enough to make his own decisions.  
  
"What happened?"  
  
"They said he couldn't speak with me." That meant he wasn't allowed to speak with her, or refused to speak with her. "And that if I ever tried to call again he would never see me again."  
  
"Sango..." Stupid ass police. Didn't they see the danger of this situation?!  
  
Moments later she was crying, and I was holding her loosely, trying not to vomit into her hair.  
  
***  
  
After twenty minutes of letting the pill sink in, Inuyasha just about broke down the door because breakfast was getting cold. Sango was invited to sit down with us, but she politely declined and slipped out the door with a look that told me I was on my own.  
  
The infamous eggs were chalky and ill-favored in my mouth at that moment, and it took much of my strength to stomach them. I was very aware of Inuyasha watching me like a hawk out of the corner of his eye-uncaring as to if he happened to get food poisoning from his horrendous cooking or not, but totally hellbent on getting a positive reaction from me.  
  
"Good...they're good, Inuyasha." I dabbed my mouth delicately with a napkin and set it down on my lap. Being a smart person, most of the time, I quickly changed the subject before he saw through my act. "So ahhh. . .Kirara is going to be in a new play...Gigi. I think it would be fun to go-"  
  
"What were you talking about, really?"  
  
My food stopped midway to my mouth. I was glad for an excuse to look shocked and stop eating, but given the abrupt switch to that particular department...I would have rather taken my chances with the eggs. "What do you mean?" Play innocent. How many times has that worked for you Kagome?  
  
He gave me a hard, inquiring stare. "You know what I mean."  
  
"I. . ."  
  
Sighing, he set his fork down. "Was it about her brother?"  
  
"Yeah. She. . .tried to call him."  
  
"And?"  
  
"She was threatened."  
  
"Fucking police." He muttered after a time. He produced a cigarette from his pocket and grabbed a pack of restaurant matches from the counter.  
  
"Hang out the window you dope."  
  
"Bite me."  
  
We weren't allowed to smoke in the apartment building, duh. And it was a pretty nice deal, high quality, lots of space, low costs. . .I wasn't giving it up because he didn't have the intelligence to at least let the smoke outside. I strode to the window, throwing it open and pointing. "Haul your royal ass over here right now or the smoke alarm will go off."  
  
He grumbled and shuffled over, hanging over the ledge and looking down casually on the streets below. Suddenly he dropped the cigarette. "Oh shit."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Fuck. . .Miroku's got two sluts hanging off him, and he's drunk. What kind of loser gets drunk in the middle of the day?"  
  
I jostled him for a space in the window and swung my head out. Sure enough, Miroku was draped in trashy women, dressed in little more tea cozies. I placed my head in my hands and immediately knew that the aspirin was going to have a hell of a time combating this particular headache.  
  
"Dammit. Go stall Sango, I'll take care of Miroku."  
  
"You go with Sango! She listens to you, you're her best fr-"  
  
I gave him the look of someone who had recently been hit by a truck. "I have female persuasion."  
  
He was taken aback for a moment, probably forgetting his own gender. Idiot. Then it clicked, and the realization dawned stupidly in his burning yellow eyes. "Oh. Fine." He whirled around and stomped out the door. Obviously he was insulted by my comment.  
  
Yanking down my top a bit and letting my hair loose, I stormed after him. There was no way Miroku was going to help Sango on her way to depression. Twit. Moron. I'm surrounded by idiots. So maybe he didn't know about the current situation with the phone call and the threats and what not, but he shouldn't be dragging strange women into Sango's apartment anyway. After all, it was more or less her apartment, he paid rent with her but she paid rent and cleaned. He had to have at least a little decency. Well...Maybe not Miroku...But still!  
  
I heard Inuyasha slip into Sango's room down the hall as I marched in the opposite direction. I hopped into the rickety elevator and jammed my thumb into the button that would take me to the lobby area. My task would be easy, but totally humiliating. If there were any other way, I would have taken it. But when Miroku was as drunk as he looked at the moment, there was no getting to him unless you were willing to part with your pride. I knew from past experience.  
  
The doors swished open and I found Miroku pressed against a wall, both girls bearing down upon him fiercely. Grimacing, I advanced. I mercilessly elbowed one female away, and closed in. My voice was soft and cooing in his ear, "Hey baby..."  
  
He turned around drowsily, still preoccupied with the second girl; I shoved her away, and was pleased as she tumbled clumsily to the floor, tripping on her five-inch pink heels. "Kagome...?" He mumbled in a drunken slur.  
  
I looked him up and down quickly. His hair was pushed back in the usual ponytail. Today he was sporting a pair of blue tinted sunglasses and a long white coat (in the summertime?). He was obviously going for the "desperado" look, and failing miserably in the attempt. I tried to hide my disgust. "Yeah baby..." I cut to the chase, unwilling to spare any more of my time than was necessary. "Why are you with these girls baby? Don't you love me?" I traced little figures on his chest with my index finger.  
  
"Ah course ah love you baby..."  
  
"Good." I placed a little kiss on his lips for extra insurance, and knew immediately that he was hooked. "Now let's go somewhere private baby."  
  
For a moment he seemed doubtful. His glance strayed to the two women I had pointedly thrown away. "Wha about..."  
  
"Come on, just us..." I shushed. After a moment, he complied, and I was soon guiding him towards the elevator shaft. Not surprisingly, the two girls were 99.9% passed out, and one looked a bit green. They had forgotten Miroku even existed by the time I was jabbing at the "up" button.  
  
He leaned in to nuzzle my neck and I promptly shoved him away. "Miroku you are such a moron."  
  
"Whatz wrong?"  
  
"You're what's wrong!" I snapped, repulsed by his drunken stupor. "You have no absolutely..." I stamped my foot. "You are such a jerk!"  
  
He mumbled something incoherent and slumped down to the floor in a pathetic heap. I hated his guts right then. Don't get me wrong, Miroku's a pretty nice guy when he's not being such a ridiculous ass, I really liked him, he was a good man. But sometimes he just did things that couldn't be ignored.  
  
"You have the worst taste, the worst timing in the world, I swear..."  
  
The elevator chimed and the doors swished open awkwardly. I dragged him out by the arm and half supporting him, led us to my apartment. Sango had enough on her brain, besides, I owed her for the aspirin.  
  
I laid him out on the couch and sat on the arm rest for a moment, regarding his face. I wondered just what Sango saw in the guy... Sure he was good-looking and jolly and pleasant when he was on good behavior, but really, he was more like an older brother than anything else. Still, I hoped things worked out for her. Whether it was with Miroku or some other man, I wanted her to be happy.  
  
My headache came pounding back full-force as the pills started to wear off, and I moaned in agony briefly before slumping towards the bathroom. Fortunately, this time I was heading in to use the shower, rather than the toilet. By then I had nothing left to throw up anyway.  
  
Tomorrow Inuyasha wanted to take me to the premiere of his sister's art show. It was both to expose me to the world again, and to get me to accompany him to a family gathering. I wasn't particularly fond of Inuyasha's relatives, but my small dislike was nothing compared to the raging hatred he felt for his dad and older brother.  
  
Maybe not hatred. At least not towards Sesshomaru. For Sesshomaru it was more of a distinct envy that sometimes blossomed into rage. Sesshomaru, the older brother. Inuyasha claimed he disliked Sesshomaru out of pure vanity; you see, Sesshomaru was beyond gorgeous. He was a pristine man-god that women and men alike worshiped with faith that bordered on extreme. His physical appearance was just immaculate; he had long, perfect hair that swayed and dripped to his waist, like Inuyasha, and he often kept it chained in a tempting, chic black band. His molten amber eyes melted hearts. Not to say that I was attracted to him or anything... Me? No, never.  
  
So as to be expected from everyone's favorite little duchess, Inuyasha was forever in loathing of Sesshomaru because of his impossible looks. And he's the strong silent type that every female adores He works for his dad, one day he'll inherit the company. He's dedicated and beautiful and untouchable. Did I mention I'm not attracted to him? Cause I'm not, I'm just telling you.  
  
It's just a sneaking suspicion, but I have faith in the belief that Inuyasha doesn't really hate Sesshomaru for said reasons...I think the problem really lies in the fact that since day one, Sesshomaru has been the favorite son. Sure their sister is a little darling and their dad loves her to death, but there's always been this sort of alien relationship going on between the father and the two sons. Inuyasha has always been sort of ignored, because Sesshomaru was always better, at...everything. Sesshomaru, the smart one. Sesshomaru, the competent one. Sesshomaru, the first born. It's no wonder that Inuyasha is bugged by how distant his father is with him, deliberately. I mean, it's easy to see that Inuyasha is the black sheep in that family. He's not about to settle down with a nice young lady and start a family. He's not about to drop fashion design to become an accountant...or whatever. He's different. It's alright if his sister does art, yeah, she's a female, according to his dad's narrow view of things, art is good for a woman. Inuyasha's supposed to be a strong male. Heh, obviously that didn't go too well.  
  
Then, ignoring all that business, there's the sweetheart little sister Rin. Seriously, the kid is the cutest thing I've ever seen. She's perky 24/7, and her innocence is everlasting, I swear. Her novelty will never wear off. She doesn't look like her brothers, she's got black hair for one thing, and it's shoulder length, not down to her waist. She usually keeps part of it bunched up in a lopsided ponytail. Which sounds weird, but not only is it, duh, cute, but it's also got something to do with artistic expression. Hard to believe the little runt is eighteen already, but hey, time flies. She's at college now, a freshman, and she's already managed to book a show for her oil paintings. A big turn-out is expected. Her work is fantastic, and it's hailing quite some interest.  
  
So I'll go, blend in, keep Inuyasha company. You know, no big deal.  
  
It's just a tad uncomfortable is all...  
  
I stepped into the shower timidly and the quick temperature change immediately went straight to my head. Slowly though, the steam and the hot water began working away at my headache, dulling it a bit. I heard Inuyasha come in, then there was a heated, one-sided argument between him and the half-dead Miroku, and then it was silent again. As silent as it can get in New York at least.  
  
I still had some projects to complete, the apartment was due to be cleaned, but standing in the shower quickly became addictive, and I let the water flow, washing all my troubles away...for at least twenty minutes.  
  
***  
  
There you go. Now listen up, I have to recommend some things, be sure to read:  
  
Ripples in the Sand  
  
By chickmooget  
  
All That Matters  
  
By feathergurl  
  
Myouga Strikes Back  
  
By Myouga Jiji  
  
Prisoner, My Prisoner  
  
By profiler120  
  
Have a lovely day everyone. And remember, even artichokes have hearts. 


	2. Je Suis Personne Petit Weasel

New chapter. Great. Fabulous. I have nothing to say right now so...enjoy.  
  
I don't own Inuyasha. Duh.  
  
***  
  
Chapter 2-Je Suis Personne Petit Weasel.   
  
***  
  
Miroku woke up the next morning with a hangover that far surpassed my own. He deserved it. After briefly explaining to him what he had almost done the previous day, I found myself going for his nice-guy attitude...again.  
  
"I...I almost..." He put his head in his hands and went silent.  
  
I was shocked, being without a battle plan. "Well, yeah, I mean...erm...you really shouldn't do that anymore, you could upset Sango."  
  
"You're right, you're absolutely right. I can't believe myself." He lifted his head and fixed me with the most unbelievable look. Strong, hurt. "And to burden you after your recent tragedy..." His hand strayed to mine. He was making it sound like my mother had committed suicide.  
  
"Trust me, it was for the best." I scowled in remembrance of Kouga. Yeah, it was for the best, but I was having little success convincing myself of that fact.  
  
"No, Kagome, that's not the point." He had gotten very close, very fast. I backed up a bit into the couch, where we were both seated, out of instinct. "Whether it was for the best or not does not matter...It will take time for your heart to heal, no matter the circumstances...and..."  
  
I swallowed.  
  
"And I would like to help you heal..."  
  
Reality hit. The alarms in my head were blaring that that was the corniest line I had heard in a good week. But as I was registering the insane sappiness, his lips were brushing mine lightly. I pulled back, "THAT'S IT."  
  
So as you can imagine, I promptly booted him out of the apartment after fixing him up with the cover story Inuyasha and I had created. I was eternally grateful that Inuyasha had been out grocery shopping at the time, because had he been around, he would not only have watched my weakness at work, he would have videotaped it.  
  
Despite the fact that I had humiliated myself again, it drove a long ignored and frankly, distrusted point home. If I wanted to "heal," as Miroku had put it, I would need to fill the void Kouga had left. That would also be the day I admitted that Kouga had left a void at all. I suppose my plan up to that point had been to be a free, independent spirit. That wasn't working out, and day by day I felt myself slipping away.  
  
I remained fixed on the couch, staring out at nothing, until Inuyasha came home laden with bags. After helping him store stuff away, I leaned on the counter and began to force my idea out into the open. "Inuyasha...we need to talk."  
  
"Talk about what Kagome?" He replied tonelessly while examining a can of guava juice.  
  
"Things."  
  
  
  
Perhaps he noticed my firmness, or the fact that my face was drawn into a hurt, sort of distant look. But whatever the reason, he set the juice down and turned to me with full attention. "Okay Kagome, let's talk."  
  
"This may take awhile, let us adjourn to the couch."  
  
"With pleasure."  
  
Still, our words remained flat and without tone. For once, we were being serious with each other.  
  
When we were both settled into the plush, velvety comfort of our seat, I began after taking a few steadying breaths. "Inuyasha...I think I'm missing something in my life."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
I sighed again. "When...Kouga... When Kouga left me, I felt awful."  
  
His eyes softened considerably. "I know Kagome."  
  
"I mean, really, I felt like I couldn't even breathe. At the very start of it, all I could do was cry for him, for his...absence in my life...Do you see what I'm getting at?"  
  
"You miss Kouga?" He asked hopefully.  
  
I grimaced. "No! Of course not!"  
  
He raised an eyebrow. "You sure?"  
  
"But...He was terrible..."  
  
"But you missed him," Inuyasha pressed.  
  
I pouted and bit my lower lip. "Yes I did. I did, you're right. I cried everyday, every night. And I wasn't crying for myself."  
  
He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and dragged me closer to him. "Hush Kagome sweetheart, it's going to be okay."  
  
I realized that I was crying, and noticed how he wasn't getting upset about what would be future tear stains on his Gucci shirt. "Inuyasha, I think I have to do something about this."  
  
"I do too."  
  
"But I can't go back to Kouga..."  
  
"Yes that's right, he would only hurt you again."  
  
"But I miss him!" We were walking in circles. Inuyasha was being fantastically patient with me.  
  
"Baby, you don't have to go back to Kouga."   
  
My sobbing paused momentarily. "Huh?"  
  
He chuckled softly. "Kagome, have you forgotten about the outside world? There are other guys out there."  
  
I had intended to direct this conversation, not to let Inuyasha do it. I had also told myself I wouldn't cry. Well, I'm not a very strong person. I don't really follow anything through.  
  
"Are you saying...I should start dating again?"  
  
"Oh Kagome..." He chided sweetly, "You make it sound so terrible."  
  
"That's because it is!" I was suddenly angry through my tears...and Inuyasha's shirt.  
  
"No, no, no...Sweetie, don't you remember before you hooked up with Kouga?"  
  
I sniffled. "No..."  
  
He laughed again, "It was just us. We were the King and Queen of the dating scene. Remember that line?"  
  
Remembrance dawned on me, "Oh yeah..."  
  
Inuyasha then began to recount some of our adventures in clubs, restaurants...Our day-to-day boyfriends... While he talked, I let my mind wander a bit. It had been fun times back then, this was true. I remembered the freedom, the excitement, the blood rush. We were young and wild, always telling each other that we could worry about settling down tomorrow. Every night we were at dance clubs, showing ourselves off and experiencing the joys of being available. It was heaven... Then I found Kouga...and I thought that being with him was really heaven.  
  
He trailed off in the middle of a tale about me cutting my foot on a piece of glass in a club and being attended to by the gorgeous DJ. "And remember how he kept wrapping the bandages around and around your foot so you wouldn't leave?"  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"My point is Kagome, that we can have those times back. I mean, what's getting in our way?"  
  
For a moment I considered it again. The bliss and independence... But what would people think? A young girl fresh out of a binding relationship and she's already throwing herself around after a week!  
  
Well it was none of their damn business anyway. It was my life, I would do whatever I wanted with it.  
  
"You're right Inuyasha. I want those times back."  
  
He lifted me up by the shoulders and looked deeply into my eyes. "You do?"  
  
"Yes." I was grinning. And it was the first real smile I had shown the world in a whole week.  
  
***  
  
I had really wanted to start getting ready for one of the first nights on the town I would be having in a long time at that moment, but Inuyasha had reminded me that we had to catch his sister's art show.  
  
I was disappointed for a moment, but gave in. I owed Inuyasha a lot.  
  
After a whole day of obsessing about what to wear, on both my behalf and his, we finally got ourselves into a taxi at six. The show had started an hour ago, but we were too disorganized to pay attention to anything but what earrings to wear, and such of the like.  
  
Inuyasha was rifling through my purse, searching for a mirror impatiently with six or so bobby pins sticking out of his mouth. "Your hair looks fine Inuyasha, quit obsessing."  
  
"Sorry, I can't help it." He shrugged and continued pawing.  
  
I sighed and hung out the window, letting the cool night caress my face. "I feel like I haven't been outside in ages..."  
  
"You're right." He jammed a pin into his mane with one hand and held the mirror up with the other.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Look at you, you're as white as a sheet! Haven't been outside the apartment for seven days..."  
  
"I...I am?" I asked abysmally, gently taking the mirror from him and examining my face. "Oh! You're right!" I stroked my cheek, "I look like a vampire!"  
  
"Well then you'll fit right in at the show," He bit out darkly.  
  
I chose not to respond. I knew he was referring to his dad and Sesshomaru, not the bland mob of artists that would be flooding the place. There was no use poking around in matters that were not my own, or my concern. He wouldn't have listened to me at the time anyway.  
  
"We're here."  
  
"Shit, does my hair look alright?"  
  
"I told you five minutes ago, it looks fine."  
  
We stepped out of the car with as much elegance as we could muster. Being fashionable people, we looked fairly decent, but we were not up to speed with the style of this particular crowd. Pale, pasty, garbed in black or dark green or dark blue or...well, let's just say the general mood was "dark." It set off their white skin in a strange way, making it glow. There was not a shred of emotion on any of the faces that wafted past us; and they all looked as if they had never slept. Artists, all of them, if what they did could be called art. It was ironic and fascinating how little Rin's work attracted this batch of followers. The girl was just so spunky and delightful, and she didn't dress like this. She slept regularly. And she loved the sun.  
  
The flow of people was being directed into a gigantic white building, an art gallery. It was ugly and loud in the way that only "modern" architecture can be. As I recall, they had torn down a terrific little theater from the 1950s to set up the white menace. Still, it was a popular place, and regulars flooded in simply to attend the art shows, regardless of the artist, and so it was a target location for Rin's first showing.  
  
I had seen her paintings previous to the occasion, and they were very good, I had to admit. They in no way reflected her outward appearance or mood, but that was the charm in them. It was really curious to see such twisted and repulsive creations coming from our little sugar sweetheart. Inuyasha and I spent lots of time with Rin, it was a favorite Sunday afternoon pastime to hang out in her studio-apartment and watch independent or Bollywood films. Rin liked to have us too. Sometimes she would paint us sitting by the T.V., or once in a while she would make us pose. We enjoyed it; being vain and showy as we were.  
  
Sesshomaru also had a particular affection towards Rin. He fulfilled the role of over-protective mother; a position abandoned when their real mother died of cancer when Rin was two. He looked after her, always made sure that she was happy, that she was okay, that she was being treated properly by her current fling. He displayed a dedication that was truly admirable.  
  
Inuyasha nudged me in the ribs. "I feel like leaving." His eyes were flicking about like a cornered animal's.  
  
"Don't be ridiculous," I snapped, and gripping his arm roughly, paid the taxi driver and began the march towards the doors.  
  
Inside people were crowding everywhere, it was difficult to maneuver to any location without having to jostle a Bruce or Octavia out of the way first. Inuyasha stayed close to me as I shoved various dark haired men and women out of my path.  
  
"There she is!" He whispered, relieved.  
  
"Where?"  
  
"There!" Having no manners, whatsoever, he pointed over the crowd to a ponytail that was sticking out of the black sea like a beacon of hope in the wilderness.  
  
I began to guide us to the ponytail, feeling pressured by the obvious looks of distaste and utter loathing that our fellows were giving us. The lights that beamed down in all directions were making me dizzy, but I blinked it out as best I could. The white walls weren't helping much either. White, white, white. White outside, white inside. Then there was the clash of both the dark paintings and the dark fans combined. It was a roaring battle of the two opposing colors and Inuyasha and I, bedecked in jeans and purposely torn and agitated clothing, were right in the middle of it all.  
  
"Hey!" Rin's girlish voice squealed happily as we approached. She rushed to us and threw her arms around our necks, flashing us each a charming smile and trying all the while not to spill the little drink she was holding.  
  
"Hi Rin," we said together.  
  
She led us back to her original place where two tall men were standing coldly, looking more out of place than me and Inuyasha. Obviously Rin was expecting us to greet these giants. One nodded and spoke at last. "Inuyasha." He nodded to me. I blushed.  
  
Inuyasha cocked an eyebrow and sarcastically replied, "Sesshomaru."  
  
I was a giddy schoolgirl. "H-Hi Sesshomaru."  
  
Of course he didn't bat an eyelash at my obvious show of attraction. He was no doubt used to having women melt before him. I wasn't bothered by that though. It was natural that such a gorgeous man would cause a reaction in me, but I never said I didn't side with Inuyasha when he said he hated his brother. Sesshomaru could be kind to Rin, he could be indescribably beautiful, but he had pissed me off far too many times for me to actually like him.  
  
"Good evening Inuyasha."  
  
Good evening? Who the hell says good evening anymore? Oh wait, sorry, Inuyasha's dad does.  
  
The man looked a good deal like his sons. He had long white hair that he usually kept tied back in a low, business-like ponytail. He had the piercing yellow eyes that seemed to look right through you. Sesshomaru had the cold, dominant manner down, just like his father. Inuyasha just put a different spin on things altogether.  
  
Unlike Sesshomaru, however, he didn't even seem to register my existence. I was just Inuyasha's date, and the fact that I wasn't actually his girlfriend made him uncaring as to what happened to me. He didn't have anything like prejudice against gay men or anything, he just really wanted grandchildren is all. It was a complicated thing.  
  
Rin broke the icy silence that was steadily developing beneath the pounding alternative music that was blaring through the speakers set out randomly in the room. "So did you just show up?"  
  
"Yeah..." I replied, glad that we were moving gradually away from Sesshomaru and his father, who had pointedly taken up an interest in the nearest painting to them. "We would have gotten here sooner but Disney's Littlest Diva here decided that she needed to take an extra forty-five minutes making sure the tears in her blazer were distressed enough."  
  
Rin laughed cheerfully while Inuyasha scowled and smiled at the same time. "Well at least I didn't take three hours fixing my hair. And I have more of it than you!" He threw back jokingly.  
  
"Listen, listen," Rin interrupted, "I could sit here and listen to you guys argue all night, but I'd rather you see my paintings. Especially you Kagome."  
  
I didn't know what she meant, but as she wasn't showing any signs of explaining her statement anytime soon, so I gave up on the subject. "So what about Sango and Miroku? They couldn't make it?"  
  
"No..." Inuyasha started, "Sango had some...family business to take care of, and Miroku, the splendid ass, is recovering from a hangover."  
  
"Ahhh..." She said, as if suddenly enlightened, and then she burst out laughing again.  
  
"Uh-huh. Hangover, sure. He didn't seem to have much of one this morning when he woke up from spending a good twenty-four hours passed out on our couch."  
  
"Why? What happened?" Inuyasha hadn't ever found out what had become of Miroku.  
  
"Nothing, he just tried to pull a fast one on me again."  
  
"Oh ho ho...Miroku the infamous player huh?" Rin inquired impishly.  
  
I grumbled and mumbled, but chose to avoid the matter in the end.  
  
"What do you have there?" Inuyasha asked, hovering above Rin's beverage.  
  
"Just tea."  
  
"Tea? Shoot. I was hoping it was the real thing."  
  
She elbowed him in the stomach, "I'm only eighteen!"  
  
"Feh, well it looks as if these people have been living on vodka their whole lives..." He waved off into the crowd, "Nadia dear, do spare a flask won't you?"  
  
Rin laughed pleasantly again into her tea.  
  
***  
  
Shortly after our conversation with Rin we met their father again and he promptly began a discussion with Rin, praising her work. Inuyasha didn't look very ready to leave his sister's side, regardless of her company, and I didn't want to wrench him away from her. So I wandered off on my own to inspect the paintings.  
  
They were all tragically beautiful, and wrong on several levels at the same time. They combined what seemed like sheer abuse to the canvas and realism in a strange, perfect way. Each was a confused portrait or mural, often a mix of chaotic black marks and scratches with a lost little photo realistic thing set somewhere in it all.  
  
I studied each one carefully, and then came upon one that gave me a little start of surprise. I found myself staring a picture of...well, myself. I was sitting casually on Rin's couch, all snuggled up and comfortable, and I had my eyes closed. Perhaps I was sleeping, but whatever I was doing, I had this lovely peaceful look on my face. Of course behind me there was a mess of black claw marks, but I really looked beautiful in this picture, much to my surprise. I suddenly realized what Rin had meant earlier about wanting me to see her gallery.  
  
"She's talented, isn't she?"  
  
I turned in alarm to locate the source of the cold, toneless voice, though I knew it already. "Sesshomaru...you scared me."  
  
I half-expected him to say, "I have a tendency to do that to people," but instead he said, "She makes black very radiant."  
  
"Yes...she does. I think this one might be my favorite." I was too uncomfortable and startled to know how stupid that had sounded, and his response reduced my already crumbled brain to mush.  
  
"I agree."  
  
I blushed vividly, and turned my head away shyly to hide it. My mind concluded that he must have not realized it had been me in the painting. That or he simply liked it because it was a good piece of art. I turned my face back to him, prepared to say something smart and flashy, but to my disappointment, he had moved on, leaving me feeling both utterly alone, and utterly humiliated.  
  
"Aw damn, wait till I tell Inuyasha about this one..." I muttered, snapping my fingers.  
  
I returned my full attention to the painting and studied it carefully. Rin had been sweet to paint me, I would have to thank her. I also rather liked the thought of being a model.  
  
Suddenly I felt a tapping on my shoulder. Deep inside, I was hopping that it might be Sesshomaru...but common sense reminded me that he preferred sneaking up on people. Inuyasha held up his drink in a congratulatory gesture. "You look good."  
  
"Huh? Oh-" I looked at the painting again. "Thanks."  
  
"Ready to leave?"  
  
"Yeah sure. If you are, that is."  
  
He shrugged. "It's a bit too black neh?"  
  
"I'll say." I shifted uncomfortably on my toes. It was really terrible of us to judge these people based on their taste, but hey, like I've said many times before, we're as selfish and ill-mannered as it gets.  
  
After finding Rin and thanking her heartily we fought back to the doors and stepped out into the fresh summer air. "The night is young." I said to the sky.  
  
"You bet. Let's hit the road. Call a taxi, I did it last time."  
  
***  
  
An hour later and after much primping Inuyasha and I left the apartment for the second time that evening, choosing to walk and enjoy the evening rather than call a cab. He was a little idiot, more giddy than I had seen him in months.  
  
"I just can't believe we're finally going out like this again!"  
  
Normally he was mean and spiteful, so this was a dramatic change for me. I had trouble adjusting. "Erm...yeah..."  
  
The buildings flicked by. New York was mesmerizing at night, I had missed seeing it all lit up like this. It felt like coming home after living on a deserted island. What had I been missing? Why had I left it?  
  
Being the good girl that I was, after I hooked up with Kouga I did my best to go easy with some of my old habits. When the engagement was finalized I stopped going out all together. I had facts to back me up when I said to the night sky, "It's been months since I did this!"  
  
"Let's go to Velvet, please?"  
  
"Inuyasha, quit skipping, you're scaring me." I unhooked my arm from his with a bit of difficulty.  
  
"So what about it, Velvet?"  
  
Velvet had always been our favorite dance club. It was the real deal. All the flashing strobe lights, the pounding music. It really wasn't unique or memorable in any way, we just liked it because it was a traditional place that stuck with all the old themes...whatever they were.  
  
"Sure why not."  
  
He squealed in girlish delight and ran ahead a bit. Passerby gave us weird looks that I couldn't rightly blame them for. I did the best to ignore them while mutely apologizing for Inuyasha's behavior at the same time. I covered my eyes and smiled. It took all of my strength to keep myself from turning around on the spot and walking away from him firmly.  
  
My embarrassment persisted for a few blocks until we finally arrived at Velvet. The sleek gray building was practically pulsing with the blaring music inside. It was a nonsmoking club, and so there was a little throng of sulky figures hanging outside puffing into the air. I was doing my best to get Inuyasha to quit, but he didn't seem to care.  
  
"Come on!" He beamed, taking my hand and rushing towards the doors. Apparently they hadn't approached their maximum capacity, as the red rope hadn't been put up yet and their was only a single security guard eyeing us suspiciously at the entrance. Velvet had no qualms about letting the "right people" in. Thank goodness for that, because Inuyasha just attracts humiliation and disaster wherever he goes.  
  
As we stepped in, I threw up my arm over my eyes and hissed. The white light was blinding, and it kept blinking on and off persistently, confusing my senses. A massive crowd of people was throbbing in time with the music, dancing wildly. The interior of the building could not be very easily distinguished, except that there was a raised stage weaving through the floor in a liquid form, and a balcony above where people could also go to dance. A bar could be found somewhere in the mess, but I was in no mood to find it just yet. A DJ was toying with a turntable on a platform some ten feet above the stage and ten feet below the balcony.  
  
"We're home!" Inuyasha chirped.  
  
"Wait a minute, what about pay?" I was shouting above all the noise.  
  
"It's Friday you big goof!"  
  
Fridays were free. I remembered that suddenly. "Oh yeah..."  
  
"What?!" He cupped an ear and bent down to me.  
  
"Nothing, let's go!"  
  
Inuyasha whooped and dashed into the horde of people that was thrashing around. I followed after him, feeling a bit of the old adrenalin rush creeping back into my veins. I was starting to remember the way that I had lived, purely for these reckless nights.  
  
***  
  
The room was spinning...but in a good way. My hair was a mess, flying all about me and hitting various people in the face. But then, their hair was hitting me in turn, so we were even. It had taken me a while to work up my courage, as I'm actually shy by nature, believe it or not, but I had finally made it to the place where I belonged: the stage.  
  
Inuyasha was somewhere...probably flirting. He didn't dance much; instead he hung out at the bar or in booths, winning over innocent victims with his empty smile. Bless his heart. But I wasn't particularly concerned with his affairs at the moment. I was preoccupied with trying to seduce two guys dancing on either side of me.  
  
It was my night of reckless abandon, I was steadily being absorbed by the beat of the music, the heat, and the hot guys combined, it was all intoxicating, and I wasn't even intoxicated yet but... My heart still wasn't in it. I tried to let go, I tried to make myself believe that this was what I wanted, but thus far, only my body was agreeing.  
  
Often as I spun to survey the rolling sea of people from the stage for a moment, I would pause or hesitate, convinced that I might have seen his face eyeing me sheepishly from the corner. His face... I hated him so much, but it was just, just, just...so hard to let go. So hard to let go of him and the pathetic dream I kept locked in the back of my mind that he might return for me.  
  
I whipped around to get a bit closer to the male who was trying to get a bit closer to me, when I stopped. Could it be? Was it him? A black ponytail was flying around. Naturally, it was connected to a head somewhere. The manly ponytail was Kouga's signature look. I searched for the head, standing patiently, totally still, watching the crowd, waiting for him to look up and see me.  
  
The guy behind me looked a little confused at my sudden seriousness and moved on, probably thinking that I was stoned or something. "Come on...look up...look up..." I whispered beneath my breath, eyes never leaving the lock of hair as it bounded over and across the masses.  
  
Suddenly a face darted up, followed by the black hair, and I gasped. My heart skipped a beat and the music dulled to a mute.   
  
It was a girl, waving around and bedecked in glowing bands.  
  
My heart fell again, hard, and I sighed. I was so stupid, who was I kidding? What the hell did I think I was doing shaking around on stage when I had no right or reason to be up at all? Feeling utterly crestfallen and embarrassed, I bounded off the platform, shoving through everyone fiercely with eyes swimming with tears.  
  
I heard someone shout my name over the music, but I ignored it and only picked up the pace as I drove onward towards the bathroom. Thank god that there wasn't a waiting line, I didn't want to hide in a throng of strangers with my mascara running sloppily down my cheeks. Especially because not a single one of them would care.  
  
When I reached an empty stall I dove in and collapsed on the small, cold bit of ground. I cried my eyes out knowing that my sobbing would be drowned out by the music. Suddenly there was a sound of shouting voices, probably just a typical fight or something. The conflicting voices grew closer, and I could just barely hear snippets of conversation.  
  
"Out of my way bitch, it's an emergency dammit!"  
  
"This is a ladies bathroom. I don't care how bad you need to use it! Go wait in line where you belong!"  
  
"TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT I'M WEARING?! Do I look like I might pose a threat to your feminine rituals or whatever?!"  
  
There was a sound of scuffling, and then more shouting, followed by some startled, shrill cries of shock, then...  
  
"Kagome?! Kagome?! Get out here!" The door of the stall shook from abusive pounding on the outside. "Let me in or come out!"  
  
"I-Inuyasha?" I sniffled.  
  
"Yes! Get out!"  
  
I threw my head down again. "No! Go away!"  
  
He cursed softly and his head suddenly appeared beneath the door. I gasped in surprise and firmly kicked at him He dodged narrowly. "Are you trying to kill me?!"  
  
"YES!" I kicked again.  
  
"LET ME IN!"  
  
"NO!" Inuyasha lashed out with his hand and grabbed my foot, then quickly dragged himself under the door with amazing ease and grace, and scrambled to his feet, right in front of me. I screamed, "What do you think you're doing?!"  
  
"Shut up." He fumbled with the lock on the door and then threw it open, snatching me roughly by the arm at the same time and dragging me out. Women dashed out of our way as we went, disgusted or enraged. I tried to hide behind my hair, I was no where close to being done crying.  
  
"I want to go home," I whispered softly under my breath. The blaring lights and the crowd swirled around me vibrantly as I stumbled along after Inuyasha. It was a wonder he wasn't drunk yet. Or hanging on the arm of some strange guy. It seemed like mile after mile we trudged, knee deep in people who were either passed out or half-way there; it was sickening. All I had was Inuyasha's hand clamping roughly around my upper arm, preventing me from straying out of his sight and falling to the ground in the salty, gross heap of flesh that I was. I could feel the bile rising steadily in my throat, "Please...Please...I want to go home..." I was whimpering.  
  
Suddenly I felt a rush of fresh air; cold, crisp, some-what clean air. At least it was somewhere outside of Velvet. I let the relief and the delightful prickle of the night wind wash over me while my lungs heaved tremendously in the sobs I had still needed to unleash. Inuyasha embraced my shoulders with one arm and led me to rest my head on his shoulder. When he got over his "nice" stint, he would be seriously pissed at me for ruining all of his clothing with my tears.  
  
I had yet to open my eyes, though I knew from the smells, sounds, and temperature that we were definitely out on the street. "We're going back now right? Please?" I whispered softly in Inuyasha's ear.  
  
"Yes, we're going home." He sounded a little annoyed, but I was too drunk on my own agony to care. He was annoyed all the time anyway.  
  
Somewhere between that moment and the next Inuyasha managed to wave his arms enough to get someone's attention. He led me fumbling and tripping to a cab, and I opened my eyes a crack as Inuyasha gently pushed me in. On the way home, he allowed me to rest my head on his lap while I continued to cry. It was a short-long trip that I spent in and out of consciousness. I hadn't had a drop of alcohol that night but all of my weeping was making me very dizzy very fast. It was hell. Inuyasha, meanwhile, stroked my hair soothingly and hummed something sweet and quiet.  
  
I fell asleep completely before we reached the apartment. I do remember him lifting me up and carrying me in, but that was it for the night. I didn't dream, it was all dark. Just dark. It was dark until morning when the sun rose, and then into the afternoon until I woke up around three. Pure darkness, like my heart.  
  
***  
  
Hope you liked it.  
  
Remember to read:  
  
Ripples in the Sand  
  
By chickmooget  
  
Myouga Strikes Back  
  
By Myouga Jiji  
  
All That Matters  
  
By feathergurl  
  
Prisoner, My Prisoner  
  
By profiler120  
  
and  
  
Disease  
  
By psycho pixie 


	3. Like a Ton of Bricks

Hello again everyone. Wow am I tired. Have fun with the third chapter.  
  
Look at the previous chapters for a disclaimer from now on please.  
  
***  
  
Chapter 3-Like a Ton of Bricks  
  
***  
  
The first thing I saw when I woke up was Inuyasha, collapsed, asleep in a chair right next to my bed. His eyes were closed serenely and he had a great atmosphere of peace surrounding him, if not total exhaustion. His hair was slightly askew, he had an open magazine on his lap, his lips were parted lightly, and he looked a bit more stupid than usual, but then everybody does when they're asleep. After giggling a little and wishing I had a camera, I was struck with a pang of self-loathing. What had happened last night? Did I...Was I....  
  
I sighed.  
  
Yes, I had done it again, I had been a horrendous bitch and dragged my best friend away from a great time. Why? Why was I such an idiot all the time?!  
  
I squeezed my eyes shut, determined not to cry for the umpteenth time in a week, and forced myself up. There is no rest for the wicked, nor do they deserve any. I mussed my hair briefly in front of the window, peering out across the city. It was early...very early. There was morning fog pouring through the street, or was that smog? No matter, it was misty, that's that. Everything was still and quiet, pretty. Yawning, I tried to recall the last time I had been up this early. The sun wasn't even visible yet, everything was just grey. Glancing at the clock, I found out that it was six.  
  
Inuyasha should sleep. It was strange how he had not slept with me, but he had dragged a chair to the bed and apparently spent the entire night there. Maybe he was too disgusted with me to share a bed. At any rate, I had a firm belief that he had stayed with me. He really was a sweetheart deep down.   
  
I threw my comforter over him and dug quietly in my closet for some clothes. I wouldn't wake him up with a racket in the kitchen, and I needed to breathe anyway...I was going out for breakfast.  
  
When I finally made it out, closing the door gently behind me, I traveled lightly down the hall, trying not to wake anyone up, as anyone who did not have to work on Sunday and had a brain in their head would be sleeping. As I paused and thought about it for a moment, I realized that it would be difficult to find a place to eat that was open at the ungodly hour of six a.m. Then shortly after that realization dawned on me I was bitterly reminded of the fact that I happened to be one of those poor unfortunates who actually did have to work on Sunday. It was because I had missed so many days...now I had to make them up, but Riba and the other girls would surely be around as well, and so that comforted me. At any rate, I had some time to kill before I had to move out, and my current problem was in the food department.  
  
It was frigidly cold outside for a summer morning. I rubbed my arms and grumbled, wishing that I had my coat. Dimly, I began to wander. I didn't know where I was going, I didn't care.  
  
My plan to make myself available had totally backfired. I was miserable and confused. The same day that I had realized I needed to move on I realized that I couldn't move on. I was at a standstill; and it was becoming increasingly obvious that nothing and nobody could ever replace Kouga.  
  
What had been so damn special about the guy? I couldn't figure it out. At first I thought it was his manliness that had attracted me...I had always found that very cute, but then his 'manliness' had been what had wrecked our relationship...  
  
And then I started thinking about that very incident. I suppose up to that point I had never really thought about his little splurge as anything more than something that had happened, something that was very bad. I didn't really stop and think about the reasons why it had happened.  
  
Kouga was the tough, chiseled, modern-day type of guy and I had always affectionately called him He-man, but just who was Ayame? I had to give him credit for being sly, I didn't suspect a thing. He picked the right girl too. I had no idea who Ayame was. I hadn't spotted her at any clubs, she was probably too young. I didn't know her from anywhere, she was a complete stranger.  
  
I couldn't deny that the little bitch had been cute. When I first saw her, oblivious to everything that would happen in the next few minutes, I had thought her adorable, just the kind of girl guys look at twice. And she seemed like a perfect darling, with her shy little voice and quiet movements. Well I guess deep down Ayame must have just been a wild child. She didn't look like the type of person who would fool around before she was even a legal adult, or the type of person who wouldn't feel at least a little bit uncomfortable with the fact that her boyfriend was engaged. Yes, little Ayame was a mystery, but I wasn't in any mood to investigate her life.  
  
Surprisingly, my contempt for her had all but dissolved entirely. I had heard stories about girls who had children so young, if she had any family or friends, they must be shocked, and maybe even distant. I knew that if I was in her position, I'd feel awful.  
  
On the other hand, what if she was rejoicing? What if Ayame was laughing wickedly in victory at this very moment? After all...she had won, I had lost. She had stolen Kouga away from me, it wasn't hard to imagine her gloating. No, I decided finally, Ayame wouldn't do that...nobody was that cruel.  
  
My sneakers scuffed humbly on the pavement, I suddenly walked into a bright light. Turning, I saw that I was standing in front of a beaming electric sign for a coffee shop. It was open. I peered in the window and saw a young lady bussing tables roughly. I crept in sweetly, a little bell jangling above my head.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Oh!" The girl straightened suddenly and threw down the rag. "Hello! Come on in!" I scrunched through the door and closed it softly. The girl swung around the long oak counter and smoothed her apron down.  
  
"You're here awfully early." I commented. "You run this place by yourself?"  
  
She smiled, "No, I just work the morning shift. What is it?" She looked behind me at a clock hanging on the wall, "Six thirty?"  
  
"And it's Sunday." I added.  
  
"Augh, don't remind me. I don't get how my boss thinks we'll get any customers. Normal people are sleeping right now." I quirked an eyebrow and she blushed, "Oh, I'm sorry! You know, I wasn't talking about you I..."  
  
"Don't apologize. Nothing good can ever come from staying with normal people anyway."  
  
"Except sleep."  
  
"Yes, except sleep."  
  
She laughed again, "What can I get you?" She asked, still smirking.  
  
I leaned over and looked the menu over. "Chai please."  
  
"Large or small?"  
  
"Small-no, large."  
  
She turned and grabbed a cup from a tower that stood near the cash register. Then she paused, "You don't mind if I join you, do you?"  
  
I shrugged, "Be my guest, though I'll warn you ahead of time that I'm not very pleasant company."  
  
"Well then we can be grumpy together, alright?"  
  
I nodded. "Alright."  
  
She yanked another cup from the stack and promptly began filling them at the dispenser behind her. I dragged a seat out of a little table by a window and sat down leisurely. She dusted the surface of our drinks with some lavender powder and then rushed around to join me. I took my cup from her. "So what's your name?"  
  
She smiled again. "Yukari."  
  
"Yukari..." I repeated. "That's a lovely name.  
  
"Thank you!" Yukari chirped. "And yours?"  
  
"Kagome."  
  
"Ka-go-me." She diced it up into short staccato syllables. "I like it. It's very pretty."  
  
"Thanks..."  
  
She took a sip of her Chai, and I did too. I looked at her over the rim of my cup and saw that she looked just like the girl next door. Her hair was brown, short, and pulled into a little ponytail. Her bangs hung long and loose in front of her eyes. She was wearing a T-Shirt under her apron that read: "My Boyfriend is Out of Town." I giggled.  
  
Yukari broke the silence neatly, "And what were you doing out at this hour, may I ask?" She emphasized the word, 'you.'  
  
"Certainly," I nodded. "I was...pausing to consider the unfairness and cruelty of the world."  
  
Her eyebrows shot up. "Wow, and I thought I was the drama queen. What's eating you?"  
  
I sent her a scathing look over my coffee. "I just broke up with my boyfriend."  
  
Her mouth made a silent "o" and she leaned back. "Geez...sorry."  
  
I reclined. "Yeah yeah, sorry, I know. Everybody says sorry nowadays."  
  
"What should I have said then?" Yukari asked smartly.  
  
I hesitated. "I don't know. I think I could do with a good slap in the face though. To be honest I've been acting like a bitch and a half lately. I've been down on all my friends, laying my burdens on other people," a pause, "Like I'm doing to you now."  
  
Her eyes softened. "It's okay. I don't mind. I have my own history of traumatic break-ups."  
  
"Yeah well..." I left my sentence hanging. The awkward silence came back to haunt us.  
  
"Uh...care to share?"  
  
Sighing, I stirred my Chai with my finger. Was I really going to involve a perfect stranger now? Well it was her fault for asking. "We were engaged. He came up to me a month before our wedding with this girl, who wasn't even a legal adult yet, and tells me she's going to have his baby."  
  
Her eyes widened. "Whoa...Shit! That's rough!"  
  
I smiled. "Thank you."  
  
"Man...you're lucky to still be alive after a wreck like that...She was going to have his baby?! Shit!"  
  
"I'm really sorry." I blurted, "I shouldn't have said anything, it's not right to concern you with my problems."  
  
Yukari stood up. "No no no... Don't feel bad sweetheart..." She walked over to me and drew me into a tight embrace. I was baffled. "It's not your fault."  
  
Snorting, I said, "Sure it is. It's easier to pin the blame that way."  
  
"Come on Kagome...Be serious." I was being serious! Wasn't I? "Now none of this was your fault! And you have every right to bitch and moan!" Now wait a minute...how long ago had I met this girl? Fifteen...ten...five minutes ago? "It happens to the best of us...don't bring yourself down and you won't bring others down with you. And that's what you want, right? For everybody to be okay?"  
  
I thought about it for a moment, though I was still genuinely shocked by this girl's actions. Assuming it would be the wisest move, I agreed, though it was not all for just getting her to let go of me. Part of it was true. "I...I guess so."  
  
"You want people to like you and to be happy themselves. Isn't that so?"  
  
"Yes." It was all true.  
  
"Then cheer up Kagome, you'll get over this. Go out there, make yourself available, move on and find another man."  
  
I laughed darkly, "That's just what my friend said. Almost those same exact words."  
  
Much to my relief, she withdrew and returned to her seat with a confident and triumphant smile. But I was not through with her yet.  
  
"And?"  
  
"And so I took him up on it, we went to a club, I was dancing with some guys and I look out and see him in the crowd."  
  
"See who?"  
  
"Who do you think?"  
  
Yukari gasped, "No way! Are you serious?"  
  
I paused, "No." And she frowned. "It turned out that it wasn't him at all, it was just somebody I thought was him."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Yes but I ended up being so grief stricken I started crying on the spot and ducked into the bathroom for some privacy in a stall. My friend saw me go in and he battled countless females to get to me. Then he dragged me out of the club, called a taxi, and carried me up to my apartment. The next day I found him asleep next to my bed-"  
  
She interrupted with, "Hm...do I sense some attraction perhaps?"  
  
"He's gay."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Anyways, the point of the story is, I dragged my best friend away from a good evening because of my stupid problems."  
  
I should have known from the way I said things that my little tale would only hail more hugging and cooing and comforting from Yukari. She promptly threw her arms around me again and repeated a thousand times that it was not my fault. She was finally back on her respective side of the table still explaining the many reasons why I was not to blame when a customer shyly poked his head in the door.  
  
"Ah! Sorry, I um...I'll be right with you!" She abandoned her chai and scooted behind the counter to serve the elderly man that had come in. I poked at mine and found that it was cold from being left alone for so long, but still good. Looking at the clock on the wall casually, I saw that an hour had already passed and it was seven in the morning. Inuyasha usually woke up for whatever reason at seven thirty, and then fell asleep again shortly after, but I still felt it was necessary to be there when he got up so that he wouldn't be worried.  
  
I waited for Yukari to finish serving the man and paid for my Chai and hers, despite her protests, and then said my farewells.  
  
"Oh wait!" She called as I was walking out the door. "Here!" She hopped over the counter gracefully one leg at a time and approached me with a pen. "Ahhhh...got a piece of paper?"  
  
"Here." I extended my forearm to her. She scribbled her name on my skin in big capital letters and a little number beneath it.  
  
She smiled and looked up at me when she was done. "Call me sometime if you ever want to hang out, or else stop by again! It was nice meeting you Kagome!"  
  
"Nice meeting you too." And I left the store quietly as an older woman swished past me. The little bell jingled above my head.  
  
***  
  
Walking home I thought about what Yukari had said. I didn't want to believe her, it felt selfish and prideful, but partially true. I wouldn't be acting like a bitch if it hadn't been for Kouga, and Ayame. But it just didn't seem right to blame anyone but myself. I hated that. I hated placing the blame and I hated it when people placed the blame on me. But I knew in my heart that there was something wrong with pressing myself down lower and lower with each passing day.   
  
It made me wonder if maybe last night, I hadn't seen Kouga in the crowd because I missed him...maybe it was that I had felt like I needed to miss him. I thought that I couldn't exist without him, I thought life would be meaningless, I thought that I couldn't go on, and when for one shining moment I broke away from that mold, I felt guilty about it. My inner struggles were ever so slowly piecing themselves together in my head. Now that I had gone a bit deeper into the problem I had to find out how to fix it. That would be the hard part.  
  
***  
  
I got home to find Inuyasha on the couch surfing channels. I flopped down beside him unceremoniously and casually asked, "What are we watching?"  
  
He set down the remote gravely. "Where were you?"  
  
I bit my lip. "I went out for coffee."  
  
Inuyasha sighed deeply and threw his head back on the couch. I was terrified, not like I didn't deserve it or anything, I had walked out on him, but I was truly frightened then. The last thing I wanted in the world was for Inuyasha to hate me. He was my very best friend and all I had left. My parents were in Europe, they hardly ever spoke to me or seemed to care, my little brother was away in a boarding school and I hardly spoke to him either...Inuyasha was my lovely friend. He would do anything for me and I would do the same for him in a heartbeat. No one else would make me breakfast, no one else would give me fashion advice, no one else would let me pose as his girlfriend in public because he was so damn attractive. And now he hated me...  
  
"I'm really sorry Inuyasha..." I said quickly. He sighed again and put a hand on his head. "It was so stupid of me...I know you must have been worried, but..."  
  
"Worried?" He spat darkly, "That's the understatement of the century Kagome. I was scared to death." At a loss for words, I just sat there like an idiot, mutely, staring up at him with sad eyes and hoping he would sense my shame and quit where he was. "Do you know what...I could have lost you! For all I knew you could have been out committing suicide or something! Do you enjoy scaring the shit out of me?!"  
  
"N-No..."  
  
"Well then why do you do these things?!" He turned to me sharply and I was unprepared. I whimpered weakly and recoiled. Inuyasha must have realized he was yelling at me and softened up considerably. He took my hands gently and said, "I don't know what I would do if I lost you." With that, he promptly let go of me and rushed into the bedroom, slamming the door closed behind him. I winced at the noise, sank into the couch and cried.  
  
***  
  
The stereos were booming loudly, my heartbeat throbbed with them perfectly. Swirling around me were young adults dressed scantily and twisting in vulgar positions. Wet hot bodies swirling in and out of the beam of strobe lights in such a furious rhythm that it made my head pound. Nina came bounding up to me clumsily, she had been drunk since midnight. I had no idea what time it was anymore.  
  
"Hiya Kagome...Havin fun?" She collapsed into a seat beside me and the man behind her turned and ogled her, taking full advantage of her loose, low top. I felt small and stupid in my silly church girl get-up. I wasn't cut out for this.  
  
"No. I want to go home."  
  
She leaned forward and cupped her ear.  
  
"HOME."  
  
"Awww come on, it's great!" She slapped my knee and gestured to the whole room.  
  
"No it's not! I want to go home!"  
  
Nina then snickered and sidled off into the crowd and away from the bar before I realized what she was doing. "Nina! Hey, Nina!" I called desperately into the sea of people; waving my arms but not leaving my seat for a second. I swore quietly under my breath and hid behind a curtain of my dark hair, passing an apologetic, embarrassed look to the man who had just checked Nina out.  
  
Suddenly Minnie appeared behind me and took up Nina's seat. To my immense good fortune, Minnie was sober. Minnie was wise and peaceful and always sober. I had never seen her drunk. Minnie was older than me, a good, good friend. Although I sometimes felt that she treated me more like a little sister than one of the pack. "Not feeling too good huh?" She asked comfortingly.  
  
I sighed, "No..." My voice was unbearably tearful.  
  
"Oh sweetheart," she placed a hand soothingly on my back. "It'll be fine, it's normal to feel weird on your first night out...but you'll get used to it, I promise."  
  
"R-Really?" I sniffed. It was my first night, and still my first month in New York. College was rough and new, now that I had so much competition I wasn't sure if I was really ready for architecture. At least not in the creative way I had imagined. Hell, a kid I sat next to in one of my classes could very well be the next Gaudi. I didn't know if I was even supposed to be looking for a career in art at all. I had lived a sheltered life in New Jersey in an all girls Catholic school. Though I liked to believe I was rebel, I was nothing compared to these people here in this strange club. Leave it to me, the complete moron, to think that I could lean on my trendy new college 'friends' in this frightening new environment. I should have never come with them to the club in the first place. I didn't deserve their company. And they were all about twenty one! At least Minnie and Nina...I was still eighteen. The rookie.  
  
"Yeah, now come on, you can do it, let's go guy spotting." Her voice was playful and sweet.  
  
"Okay...but you'll stay with me right? I couldn't survive on my own right now..."  
  
She smiled at me. "Sure I will." And winked.  
  
Then she took my hand and led me away from the bar, which I had come to think of as my little island. It was hard to move away, I was very reluctant, and I was once again second-guessing my actions. Hadn't I resolved a few moments ago that I should have stayed in my nice, safe little dorm room? Minnie guided me through the crowd, and people parted for me slowly, they were all wearing that same stupid expression that made it look like they couldn't decide whether to fuck me or vomit or collapse. I felt green. I probably was green. But who could tell under the multi-colored light? For half a second, everyone looked green, then red, then purple...  
  
"Minnie..." I moaned. She didn't answer. I couldn't even see her. She was somewhere in front of me, and all I knew of her was the feel of her hand closed firmly over my own and pulling me away; I tightened my grip on that hand and bowed my head, eyes closed. "Minnnnieeee..."  
  
Suddenly we slowed, and stopped. The lights weren't as bright behind my eyelids, and so I opened them cautiously. We were on one of the private seating areas off of the balcony, although I couldn't recall ever climbing stairs on our trek. Maybe it was a second floor...Come to think of it, I didn't know where the hell we were at all. But I didn't have time to think about that, as Minnie was busily associating with some of the sullen, dark figures that were hanging in the shadows like a disease, and I couldn't feel her hand anymore. I rushed to her side and grabbed her shoulder. She turned to me brightly and flashed another pleasant smile; the whites of her teeth showing in the darkness.  
  
"Who the hell is she?" It was a breathy voice. It was slow and deep, but I couldn't tell if this mysterious person was drunk or just being intimidating. Judging from my spooked reaction, I'd say he was being intimidating. I couldn't see his face, it was too dark to see much of anything.  
  
Minnie answered for me, rather cheerfully. "This is Kagome!" And she took me by the shoulders and pushed me forward.  
  
I hated her for a second, and then gave a weak smile to the man. I could feel his eyes raking over me and I felt like a piece of meat. A rather insignificant piece of meat. "Kagome who?"  
  
Minnie was silent, so I spoke up. My voice was breaking. "H-Higurashi..."  
  
The man was quiet then as well, and no one spoke for a moment. I felt pressured and uncomfortable, and I was almost certain that Minnie was no longer standing behind me. But all of a sudden, a fresh, healthy, sober voice piped up and I felt relieved. I had been rescued, perhaps.  
  
"Shit! How old is this one?! Thirteen fucking years old or something?!" Granted, it wasn't the nicest rescue statement in the history of the world, but it still held a certain measure of worry for me of all people. I looked for the source and saw something even more luminous than Minnie's immaculate teeth glowing in the black sea. Something large, long...hair? Yes, it was white hair, and I could see a set of yellow eyes staring at me under the bangs. Yellow eyes and white hair. Somehow I wasn't surprised.  
  
"Shut up Inuyasha! She's twenty, aren't you Kagome?" There was Minnie. But I was wishing then that she was actually gone as I had assumed.  
  
"E-Eighteen...Minnie." The yellow eyes grew wide.  
  
"Whoa...H-Hey, you shouldn't even be in this club Kagome." I turned and saw Minnie's face in the flicker of a strobe light, it had a questionable look on it that made me think for a moment that Minnie was about to abandon me to save her own skin because I had unknowingly overlooked the age limit at the club. But not Minnie, not safe, sober Minnie, no...never.  
  
"Minnie you asshole! What the hell do you think you're doing brining minors in here?!" Minor? Now wait just a minute...  
  
The yellow eyes were flashing. I wondered what had happened to the sly, mysterious man. But his absence was a blessing, so I dismissed it quickly. I was in danger of being thrown out or possibly arrested.  
  
"Back off Inuyasha! I'm not her mother! She can take care of herself!" Was that really Minnie talking? Couldn't she please be my mother just for tonight? My heart was sinking in panic.  
  
My eyes were pleading when I looked at her, and I hoped that she might see me in the shadow. She did, and she was unprepared. "Uh...sorry Kagome, but you have to watch yourself." I was on the verge of bursting into tears. "Listen," her voice was a whisper now, "just lay low and no one will suspect a thing. Who's gonna catch you now Kagome? You've made it this far..."  
  
There was hand suddenly on my back. And it wasn't Minnie. I jumped and yelped stupidly, and seconds later was thankful for the darkness that was hiding my vivid red face. "Shh, calm down. Have a drink."  
  
"Shit! Minnie! Don't do that!" So it was 'Inuyasha's' hand on my back... Well rescuer or not, I had just met him moments ago and that hand would have to leave or be broken in half. I was just reaching for his wrist when a glass was shoved under my nose. I winced at the potent alcoholic scent and recoiled.  
  
"Drink it."  
  
"Minnie! Dammit, no!" Inuyasha again.  
  
But I knew Minnie and I did not know Inuyasha, so I ignored him. "What is it?" I asked suspiciously.  
  
She shrugged in the poor light. "Just a drink. It will help you relax."  
  
"Don't!"  
  
"Does it have any alcohol in it?" We were still choosing to pointedly disregard Inuyasha in our conversation.  
  
"Just a drop. Nothing strong."  
  
"You sure?"  
  
"I'm sure."  
  
"Seriously kid, don't drink it!"  
  
Kid? I was no kid. Without further hesitance, I snatched the beverage from Minnie's hand and downed it quickly. It was hot and choking in my throat, but determined not to flounder in front of Inuyasha, I stomached it.   
  
Twenty minutes later Minnie's predication was gaining ground. I was more 'relaxed' than I had ever been in my life. I was drunk, and suddenly every single male looked attractive, until someone decided to hone in on my action.  
  
I wandered, clumsy and ridiculous to a sandy haired man, still unbelievably in the dark sitting area rather than wandering about the club. I saw him across the room through a hazy blur and made my way, stumbling, to him. Then I flopped into a plush, black velvet seat next to him and leaned towards his face.  
  
"Yer cute..."  
  
He looked over and smiled at me in a way that suggested he was also drunk. "So're you..."  
  
I grinned, "Really?" My breath was a whisper. We were growing closer and closer with each second.  
  
He whispered back, "Yeah..."  
  
Just as our lips were about to seal, I voice startled both of us away from each other.  
  
  
  
"Back off sweetheart, he's taken."  
  
I hardly cared about the voice and what it was saying. I hardly heard it at all. I was still swaying towards the random person I was about to kiss. But he, on the other hand, was slowly turning away from me and into the direction of the voice. His eyes were half-closed in drunken stupor. "Inu...yasha..."  
  
Inuyasha? Wasn't he the little bastard who had been prancing around a few...hours (?) ago? Well I wasn't about to let some stupid jerk tell me what I could and could not drink and who the hell I could and could not kiss.  
  
"Excuse me?" My syllables were slurred and incoherent.  
  
"You heard me. Now get the hell away from him."  
  
I looked between the two men. My guy was staring with a strange, abysmal affection for the white-haired Inuyasha, who was standing stoutly before us with his hand on his hips. He had been drinking heavily like the rest of us, but he seemed to have a good head for alcohol, and so he was a forced to be reckoned with for me, the underage first-timer. Having grown up in a persistent female presence, my foggy mind had no trouble immediately coping with the fact that this person had his eye on a fellow male. Everyone I had known for the vast majority of my life had their eyes on males. And from my point of view, standing there, dressed stylishly with sweeping hair that was perfectly healthy, he looked like a girl.  
  
"Why should I?" I swaggered towards the man again, and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, pulling him back towards me.  
  
"Because I fucking said so bitch." He took a step nearer to us, but I was unperturbed.  
  
"Oh so now I'm a bitch now am I?" I paused as I lost my train of thought, then found it again, "What happened to me being the 'kid?'"  
  
"I'm not...going to repeat myself..."  
  
The long silent male we had been fighting over for no particular reason suddenly spoke up. "Inuyasha baby..."  
  
I was as mortified as I could be while intoxicated. "W-What...?"  
  
Inuyasha was grinning broadly all of a sudden. "Anthony..." He stooped down and gave Anthony a long kiss.  
  
Shocked, I could only sit there and stare. Presently Inuyasha acknowledged my existence again turned his head to look at me, "Get outta here, you lost."  
  
A swooping, rushing feeling of utter depression, intensified by alcohol, consumed me. I was speechless, but the tears were gathering in my eyes before I had time to talk anyway. I stumbled to my feet and began pushing myself into the dark crowd; through the dark chairs and the dark light, into the booming dance floor and towards the doors.   
  
It was impossible to tell how long it took to work my way through the people, but I knew that it was far worse than when Nina had taken me through. Nina...Nina...Where was Nina? What had happened to her? Where was she when I needed her? Hadn't she said she would stay with me? My mind switched from heated rage and embarrassment to frantic desperation. Nina, Nina, Nina, I had to find Nina. Where was Nina? Had to find Nina... Nina would help, Nina would know what to do. Nina would save me.  
  
I lost track of where I was or what was going on beyond the fact that I needed to find Nina, and after spinning around in between the countless bodies I stopped dead and put my head in my hands, ready to break down and cry right there, even if I had to lay down on the cold concrete floor and risk being trampled to death by people who were just as drunk as I was.  
  
At that moment, it was the worst thing that had ever happened to me. I was confused and dazed, and there was nothing I could do, I crouched down and tried to muffle the music by putting my hands over my ears. I was an eighteen-year-old, underage for both the club I was in, and the fact that I was totally intoxicated. I had no experience, I didn't know what to do, I couldn't manage myself, and as far as I knew, I was doomed to die in the club, huddled on the ground.  
  
And then, like a whisper from the heavens, I heard a familiar voice. I hopped to my feet as quickly as I could without falling down and strained to hear Nina calling again. I gasped when I heard it and the music faded to a mute. My heartbeat sped up considerably as I began shoving people roughly out of my way. Didn't they understand?! Nina was calling! Gradually I felt the crowd dissipating as I grew nearer to my goal, and then they faded away completely when I stumbled out of their midst and stood before the bar, and Nina.  
  
Her back was to me and she was chatting wildly with somebody...the bartender perhaps, or a guy. I tapped her shoulder gently, feeling my exhaustion catching up with me at the same time.  
  
"Nina...Nina..." I gasped, looking for a seat and finding that all those near her were occupied by guys who were observing my dear friend with quite some interest.  
  
She turned around slowly and I saw that she had a little shot-glass in her hand. Her eyes were half-shut, there was a strange expression that I had never seen before on her face. I tried to place it but could not.  
  
"Hey sweetheart..."  
  
It took me a little while to realize that her pronunciation was sloppy. I was simply too overjoyed to see her to care about anything else.  
  
"Nina!" I sputtered, "We have to go! Now!"  
  
She took her time responding. "What's...the rush?"  
  
"I..." And then it hit. Nina was not herself. She was not the sane, sober, controlled, wise person I had met and befriended. She was drunk, and it terrified me. Nina did not get drunk, she didn't act irresponsible, she always managed herself perfectly. To add to my pain, I understood that Nina had not been calling my name as I had hoped, I had merely heard her voice and my battered mind had made me believe that she was crying out for me.  
  
"Whatz a matter...Kagome?  
  
I was too numb with fear to answer. Instead, I turned and ran towards the doors, too anguished to do anything but get away from the stranger as fast as I could. At the same time I felt a bitter despair welling up inside of me. I was truly lost now. Abandoned. Alone. No one could help me, I would die. I would be attacked or kidnaped or stuck by lightening and there would be no one left to protect me or tell me what to do.  
  
The large black double doors loomed into view and I crashed into them, hurling my body outside into the cool night air. I dragged myself to the side of the street and hung over the gutter as cars rushed by inches from my nose. There I surrendered the contents of my stomach to the inky blackness of the sewer below, hoping for one moment that I might be able to purge myself of the vile feeling that was reeking havoc in my insides. But alas, it remained, and I broke down and cried with my head in my hands.  
  
I heard someone come up behind me and prayed that they might take a hint and leave. Then I was afraid that it might be a lunatic brandishing a knife and my worst fears of being alone without aid resurfaced fresh in my mind. I was considering taking my chances and making a wild bolt across the busy street when I felt a calm, steadying hand on my back. It stroked my flesh and soothed me gently. Carefully, I turned my head and looked over my shoulder to see a long mane of flowing white hair and a pair of yellow eyes staring at me.  
  
My long forgotten anger came back full force and I sprang up and away from him. Or at least I hoped to. Instead I clumsily fell on my ass and swore loudly. He smiled.  
  
"Hey kid."  
  
"Get away from me..." My voice was still fuzzy.  
  
"Come on twit, you're drunk and you're vomiting on a street corner. Don't you want some help?"  
  
My brain scrambled for answers. Wasn't he supposed to be drunk? What about the guy we had been fighting over? Didn't he hate me for trying to steal his man? Why was he being nice to me? And what was his name again? I had forgotten it...  
  
He didn't wait for me to respond, he made a clucking noise in his throat that sounded like a motherly reprimand and swung his arm about my shoulders, lifting me up carefully and cooing to me all the way. "Well...we'd better call a taxi, don't you think? Where do you live?"  
  
I gave into the peace and security he was giving me. Plus his shoulder was warm, and he was offering it to me like he wanted me to lean on it. I mumbled, "School of the Art Institute of New York....dorm...building. Room...number..."  
  
"That's enough sweetie," he whispered in my ear while using his free hand to hail a passing cab. When it slowed down beside us he ushered me in and told the driver our destination. He recognized the location and nodded shortly before taking off.  
  
The car made me sick, and he saw this and told me to lay down and put my head in his lap. That was the first time I did that. But it wouldn't be the last. When I had settled down he made the clucking noise again. "Look what you've done to your hair!" He chided softly, "Tsk, tsk, tsk, it's all matted..."  
  
I closed my eyes with pure delight as he began gently undoing my tangles with soft fingers. He was so careful and his touch so light that I felt myself lulled to a state of peaceful relaxation. So I let myself fall asleep in this person's lap, and his name came back to me just as I nodded off. I whispered hoarsely, "Thank you Inuyasha..."  
  
"You're welcome Kagome."  
  
***  
  
I had found out from him later that he had a terrific way with alcohol. He was drunk for shorter periods of time and came out of his stupors quickly rather than gradually. He could drink anyone out without feeling a thing for the longest time. He said that he had watched me have shot after shot after the fist one Nina had offered me, and informed me that I had become roaring drunk within twenty minutes.   
  
Inuyasha had felt sorry for me, the new kid under Nina's influence, and told me that Nina was a sweet person, but made terrible decisions and was very irresponsible. Nina had probably known that I wasn't the right age for the club, and she had certainly known that I wasn't the right age for alcohol. She just didn't think of the consequences.   
  
Unfortunately, Inuyasha had been putting it away himself that night, and so when I had ambled up to his current "fling" he had reacted without a hint of sympathy because he was intoxicated and hardly remembered who I was. Minutes after he had made out with Anthony, who we never heard from again, and watched me stumble away, he had realized what had happened and chased after me. He had pursued me through the crowd but his recent doings with many small glasses of that certain potent liquid were still fresh in him, and his vision was blurred, his head was pounding with a raging headache, and he was still half out-of-it.   
  
But luckily, he had seen me run out the doors at the last minute, and he had followed me out and helped me home. Through gentle coaxing he had gotten my room number out of me, and then he had carried me to my room and put me to bed, leaving his phone number on a slip of paper taped to my refrigerator with his name beneath it and a note saying, "Call me."  
  
Our friendship had grown from that point, and he attended my college so we saw a lot of each other. I turned nineteen a week after the accident that had brought us together, and that made him two years older than me. Twenty-one. Inuyasha was going to become a fashion designer, he came from a wealthy family and had started college a little later than planned after he had taken a long trip in Europe to clear his head after the death of a close family friend.  
  
He introduced me to some of my closest friends, Sango and Miroku. Two years after we met we got an apartment together. We had had it for a year. I was a sophomore now. He was a senior. Neither of us spared much thought to what would happen when Inuyasha graduated. Only that we would stick together.  
  
***  
  
I pried myself from the pillow and wiped my tears away. Somehow I had managed to take a nap. I was lazy. I had a knack for sleeping. When I faced the clock hanging over the T.V. I saw that I had fifteen minutes to get to work, and I collected my limp self and scrambled out the door. I didn't know where Inuyasha was.  
  
***  
  
How do you like that? Nice third chapter all neat and laid out splendidly. I'm about to fall over due to exhaustion, so farewell gummies. 


	4. Coworker Alley in Candy Land

Glad you guys are liking it so far. It's nice to get such positive support. And because you are all so sweet, I'm going to respond to your reviews like a good little goose. .  
  
Kiki Smythe-I'm happy you like Inuyasha being gay. I was afraid of possible hostility...  
  
sashlea-No, I have never read Spider, or Wolf, for that matter. But now that you have recommended them to me I'll be sure to check them out. It's always nice to get advice in that department, I never know what to read anymore. Thank you! Yes, that was a rather dramatic first meeting...but it's more interesting than having them bump into each other on the street and giggle and all that. About putting the stuff on the same line, I'm not sure what you mean by that...And it wasn't impolite, don't worry.  
  
Rabid-Inu-Girl-Well aren't you a happy person? To start, thanks for reading and reviewing every chapter, that was very thoughtful. Yes, I will add more information about the stories, thanks for the tip. Um...Yes, I've met several gay men and they're all a riot. Not all of them are as feminine as Inuyasha, though. And I've never had artichokes on pizza but they are very good. That line was from the French movie Amelie. So is the title of the story and the title of chapter 2. The story title translates to, "do you want to meet me?" And the other one translates to, "I am no one's little weasel." ^ ^  
  
Stacerue-Well thank you very much! What lovely positive comments! I really appreciate your review!  
  
shadowcat-Yes, Inuyasha is gay. How very perceptive of you.  
  
***  
  
Chapter 4-Co-worker Alley in Candy Land  
  
***  
  
I clicked my pen. And clicked it. And clicked it.  
  
It was noon. Fifteen more minutes and I would be on my lunch break.   
  
Riba was sitting next to me sharpening her letter opener, which was shaped like a sword. If someone she didn't favor approached the desk, she would either sharpen it in front of them or lick it slowly. I liked Riba. She was my type of person. Riba was older than me, a plump, middle-aged, black woman with a wasp-like sense of humor. Today she was wearing a pirate-cut, white shirt and she had her hair piled on top of her head in a little mountain.  
  
Riba and I were both receptionists for the front desk of a building that was devoted to a vast company that produced office supplies. Our building was one of many that handled paperwork for the company in New York, and the world for that matter.  
  
My job was very boring. I sat at the desk in my spinning office chair and either answered the phone or directed people to where they wanted to go in the building. Riba was a nice, chatty companion, and often favored me with her conversation when we weren't busy with our own tasks.  
  
Today no one was calling. No one was coming in. Nothing was going on.  
  
My mind was whirring with thoughts of Inuyasha and what he thought of me. We both knew that our argument had been over more than just my going out for coffee and not telling him. It was about the club accident, and the fact that I was becoming too dramatic and stupid for my own good. I think we were anticipating that my next stunt would be something really bad. He probably did entertain the thought of me committing suicide as being a real possibility.  
  
I had professed my problems to Riba after I had bustled in several minutes late. Half-way through our discussion she made a very good point.  
  
"And he thinks I'm going to commit suicide."  
  
"Suicide?" Riba sputtered. "Where did he get that idea?"  
  
"Well...you know... Because of...Kouga." I said sheepishly while pretending to look for something in my purse.  
  
Riba shook her head slowly, "He thinks you'd commit suicide over Kouga?"  
  
I stopped rifling and looked at her. "What do you mean?"  
  
"Honey," she gave me an imploring look. "What do you think of Kouga?"  
  
"Think?" I snorted. "I try not to."  
  
"Then it's safe to say you don't like him?"  
  
"Duh."  
  
She threw up her hands in disgust. "Then what makes Inuyasha think you'd kill yourself over him?!"  
  
I paused in consideration of her statement. "You're right. I hate Kouga. I hate what he's done to me, and...and...now that I think about it, I've wasted a good week of my life! He's caused me so many problems! Why don't I get over him if I don't like him so much?!" I sighed. "I feel like I'm walking in circles..."  
  
Riba shook her head again and reached to answer the phone. "I don't understand either of you. Always pissing each other off, pissing other people off, getting pissed off by other people...lord, you need to beat yourselves back into shape before someone else does it for you."   
  
I pictured Sango coming at me with a baseball bat and laughed.  
  
Still clicking my pen, Riba alerted me to the fact that it was time for lunch, and I got up and left with her towards the elevator. We usually went up a few levels and hung out with the ditty ladies in the cubicle department. They were almost as crazy as Riba, and they always found time to make me cookies. I loved the ditty middle-aged ladies.  
  
When the little ding chimed, sounding the end of our brief trip up to the top levels of the building, I perked up a bit and then yawned. Riba peered over at me. "You okay?"  
  
I nodded quickly and adjusted the strap of my handbag. "Yeah, just a little tired."  
  
"Don't think I haven't noticed how pale you are these days." She added darkly as we stepped out into the vast maze of identical white boxes. I chose not to respond.  
  
We hadn't gone more than a few steps when I heard a bright voice call my name. It was Nancy. Nancy had vivid red hair a foot tall piled in a messy bun on top of her head. She was pleasantly plump, and wore daring make-up. "Heeey there Kagome!"  
  
I smiled meekly. "Hi."  
  
Riba clucked behind me and leaned in close to me, "You know where to find me." And with that she sidled off, though not before Nancy made a good natured insult in her direction.  
  
"So how are you?" I asked politely.  
  
Nancy's expression changed rapidly and at once she launched into a flood of talking that covered everything from her back pains in the middle of the night, to her young niece's birthday, to her cat's habit of tearing up the furniture. I nodded sweetly, bobbing my head customarily to every statement she made.  
  
"Oh that's awful." I commented casually when she finished a story about the demise of her new leather shoes at the clumsy hands of her husband.  
  
"Yes it is!" She reached over and roughly unplugged her persistent phone without averting her eyes from me. Then she made an excited noise and bent underneath her desk. "You're on your break, right dear?"  
  
"Yes I am."  
  
"Well..." She emerged with a little plastic container clutched in her chubby hands. "Maybe this will brighten your day! I just made them, Dutch cookies. Guaranteed to put a bit of meat on you, you skinny thing!" Nancy then burst into a fit of hearty laughter as she passed the box to me.  
  
"Thank you so much!" I glanced at the clock hanging over her computer and quickly bade her farewell. My break was almost over.  
  
After navigating my way through the hive and saying hello to a few of my other coworkers I swooped in through a door along the far right wall and closed it shut firmly behind me. I had a small tower of plastic containers balancing precariously on one arm and my bag in the other. Riba laughed from where she was leaning casually against the counter, there was a bubbling coffee pot to her left.  
  
"Get me some of that, will you?" I grumbled.  
  
It was the 'coffee room' where my friendly group of ladies gathered on our breaks to drink and gossip. The male population of the building had taken the hint several years back before I had even started working there and pointedly avoided the room at certain hours of the day, for fear of interrupting whatever sacred female rituals we were conducting beyond the ominous door.  
  
The coffee room was small, nothing special. There was a tiny table and some chairs in the middle of the tiled floor, a counter that stretched across the back wall, a little sink, a small refrigerator. Yet somehow, we managed to squeeze all of the overweight women plus me, the single other woman under thirty, Jordan, and Sheri, a tightly wound, gray haired lady who resembled a stick and smoked with a shaking hand in or outside of the building; it didn't matter to her.  
  
Kaede, my favorite person after Riba, and the closest thing to a grandmother I had ever had, was sitting up on the counter leisurely. She fetched a mug from a cabinet above her head and poured me my coffee. I slumped over to the table and let my packages tumble forth next to Jordan's, who was sitting in one of the chairs next to Sheri. I joined them after I took my beverage from Kaede.  
  
"Mind not smoking today Sheri? I have a headache."  
  
She made no move to put out her cigarette, but instead dug into her purse, muttering incoherently. In seconds she produced a bottle of aspirin and tossed it in my general direction. I narrowed my eyes. "Thanks Sheri." She nodded.  
  
"So..." Jordan leaned close to me, her bright blue eyes afire with mischief. "Riba tells us you're going to commit suicide?"  
  
I blanched. "What?! No, I-"  
  
Kaede made a low rumbling noise that was probably a growl of some sort. "Yes, explain yourself Kagome."  
  
I looked desperately from face to face, seeking help, and saw Riba snickering devilishly. "Fiendish wench!" I accused.  
  
"Ahem?" Kaede tapped her fingers impatiently on the counter.  
  
"Let me explain-"  
  
"Please do," she interrupted again.  
  
I cleared my throat uncertainly, very aware that were there about four sets of eyes focused on me. Even batty old Sheri was staring at me intently. "Well, you all know about, about...the um...break-up..."  
  
Jordan's eyebrows shot up and her mouth made a silent 'O.' Sheri sniffed coldly. Kaede nodded silently. Riba scowled and muttered to herself.  
  
"Anyway..." I continued apprehensively, "I've been acting bitchy lately, pardon me Ms. Kaede, because of it, and this morning I snuck out for coffee after a particularly bad night and when I came back Inuyasha was upset and proposed that I could have been killing myself for all he knew." I sighed and sank into my plastic roost. "And that's that."  
  
Kaede made a motherly noise and hopped off the counter to pat my head and give me a little hug. "Don't smother the girl," Sheri snapped.  
  
Jordan leaned back, "Well that's rough Kagome, and please don't hate me for saying this, but shouldn't you start thinking about getting over Kouga? I mean, he seems to be the cause of all your problems lately, and you're missing work all the time..."  
  
"Jordan!" Kaede reprimanded. "Horrible things like these take years to recover from!"  
  
Jordan shrugged and I gently pulled myself from Kaede's embrace. "No Ms. Kaede, she's right."  
  
Riba intervened, "Kagome has no reason to be hung up over a piece of shit like Kouga."  
  
"Don't be vulgar." Kaede said softly.  
  
"Let her say whatever the hell she wants." Sheri snuffed out her cigarette on her bare finger, a trick I had once been impressed by. Unfortunately, she simply pulled out a fresh one and lit it from the smouldering ashes of the first that were eating away at the plastic surface of the table where they had fallen. Riba scowled and threw a wet paper towel over the mess.  
  
"As I was saying," Kaede continued in her wisest voice, "Kagome has every right to be upset, if it soothes the pain." She smiled down at me.  
  
"Not if it causes other people pain." I added quietly.  
  
At a loss, Kaede faltered for words and then the room was quiet. After a few awkward moments, I slapped the table enthusiastically with both hands. "But the point is, I'm not going to commit suicide!"  
  
"Here, here," Jordan lifted her cup to me.  
  
Riba glanced down at her watch and then looked up again, "Kagome we have to get back."  
  
I grumbled and saw that I hadn't even gotten halfway through my coffee. I gathered my things and prepared to leave. "May I please borrow these for the rest of the day?" I asked Sheri, lifting the bottle of aspirin she had chucked at me earlier.  
  
Sheri cackled and very much resembled the witch stereotype from fairy tales. I took that as a yes and headed out the door after Sheri. "Bye everybody."  
  
***  
  
The rest of the day passed without anything eventful occurring. I sat at the desk with Riba and we chattered about such and such, trying to pass the time. A few people came in, there were a few phone calls, nothing out of the ordinary.   
  
But for however dull it was, I wanted to stay in my spinning office chair forever, because I dreaded coming home to Inuyasha. I was afraid of what would come from any more conversation between us, but I was even more afraid that I might come home to find that he had packed up and left. I wouldn't put it past him, who wanted to live with a psycho like me? Hell, I didn't even want to live with me.  
  
I volunteered to shut off all the lights, even though it was Riba's turn, and took my time, staying late. But eventually the janitor booted me out and I was on my way home. I dragged my feet for a while, thinking that I could walk, possibly get lost, and never have to face Inuyasha again. Yet after a while, I realized that if I came home late and Inuyasha still had any shred of concern left for me, I could ruin that past salvation. So I called a taxi and hurried home.  
  
The halls of my apartment building were quiet and forbidding. I stopped at Sango's door and rapped sweetly, hoping that maybe she would be able to tell me if Inuyasha was home or not; but she wasn't there. I continued to my own door, swallowed, and opened it with the greatest of care.  
  
My heart burst and I almost cried for joy when I heard the sound of the T.V. coming from Inuyasha's room. He had a private set. But just as quickly as my spirits rose, they came crashing down when I realized that now I would actually have to talk to him. Now was the time. I had to be a big girl for once in my life or risk losing my dearest friend in the entire world.  
  
I walked to his door softly, determined to make as little noise as possible. "I-Inuyasha?" My voice was meek and trembling. There was no answer except the sound of the T.V. as it was switched off. I cleared my throat, "May I come in?" Still no answer. Hesitantly I pushed the door open, only to be thrown out again by a stiff hug.  
  
My brain took a few seconds to register what had happened as I stumbled backwards and crashed into the couch. His arms were around me, holding me close, pushing the air out of my lungs with sheer force. My nose was buried in his white hair. I was speechless.  
  
He was too. For several minutes, or hours, we stood there like that. I didn't know about him but I was terrified to move and possibly shatter the beautiful moment. That and I was paralyzed with relief; surely this gesture meant he didn't hate me after all.  
  
Inuyasha was the first to speak. "Kagome I'm sorry."  
  
"Me too Inuyasha."  
  
I lifted my face from his hair and together we moved towards the couch, though he never released me from his grip. When we sat down I cuddled into him and rested my head on his shoulder. He pet my hair gently.  
  
"I'm going to try and be a better person Inuyasha." I began quietly. "I'm going to br better for you and Sango, and Miroku, and Rin, and myself. I need to put Kouga behind me, and after the other night I think we both know that that can't be done in just twenty-four hours. I think I need to take things one step at a time. Do you understand what I'm saying?"  
  
"Yes Kagome. I think you're right." He sighed deeply as I was starting to nod off into his shoulder. "And I just wanted to apologize because, well...it was probably all my fault. You know, at the club."  
  
I was startled out of my relaxation. "Why?"  
  
"Because what you said is true, it can't happen in one day. And I tried to make it that way."  
  
"Oh Inuyasha, don't say that..."  
  
"No, it's true! I shouldn't have forced you into it, it just made things worse." He held me even harder for a second, as if he were afraid I might escape. Again.  
  
I curled my finger into his hair. "Please don't say such things... Neither of us knew. You were helping, you wanted to help me. It wasn't as if you were being malicious or purposely trying to hurt me, and it isn't as if you're to blame."  
  
"But..."  
  
"Just trust me on this one." I sought a new angle. "You won't help me get over...You won't help me get better by feeling guilty about something that wasn't your fault. If you want to help, then forget about it. And I will too."  
  
He was reluctant, but finally agreed.  
  
"Good." I said, and then I yawned. I had exhausted myself worrying over Inuyasha. "Oh, and I'm sorry I walked out on you this morning. And I wasn't going to commit suicide. I met a girl at the café I went to, by the way. She's really nice, her name's Yukari. And another thing, thanks for sleeping next to me. Why didn't you get into the bed?"  
  
"Okay, slow down. For one thing, we aren't going to mention the stupid incident this morning ever again."  
  
I smiled. "Deal."  
  
"And I know you would never commit suicide, I apologize for that comment."  
  
Inuyasha..."  
  
"We won't speak of that again either. Anyway, I'll have to meet Yu...whatever her name is, sometime."  
  
"Yukari," I supplied sleepily.  
  
"Yeah, her. About the sleeping arrangements, I thought you might wake up in the middle of the night and freak out or something."  
  
"Now why would I do that?" I yawned again and rubbed my eyes.  
  
"I dunno. Seeing a male, maybe you would think I was Kouga."  
  
I laughed. "How very thoughtful of you Inuyasha."  
  
"Don't mention it."  
  
"Quit saying that."  
  
***  
  
  
  
Needless to say, having both exhausted ourselves worrying about each other the whole day, we drifted off to sleep soon enough. Of course, that was after we spent some time talking. Talking about what we liked to pretend were random subjects, but we were actually planning. Yes, planning, rather than bumbling along. Steps, as I had said, needed to be taken, and taken one at a time, very slowly.  
  
Inuyasha once again advised that we relieve the tension of the situation. But this time, he was more subtle. We tossed around the idea of visiting Rin, then went on to consider gathering up Sango and Miroku and going to lunch.  
  
When we both woke up, we lolled around on the couch for what seemed like an endless span of time; piecing our wits back together and flipping channels mindlessly. Gradually, after much small talk, we decided that we would go see Rin, and invite her to see a movie at the local Independent Film House.  
  
  
  
It was odd, how easy it was to forget how stressed out we each had been only a few hours ago. I guess it was the fact that for a time our whole lives revolved around and depended on the opinion of one another, and when it was all done, we were so relieved we couldn't think straight. It proved to me how strong our friendship really was, and for all my pain and suffering and fingernail biting through the day, and a lot of the week, I think that it was worth it to be rewarded with that knowledge. I only hope that Inuyasha didn't wreck himself up as much as I did, but it's almost a sure thing that he did-at least for one day. I saw the look in his eyes when I woke up on the couch with him. Before his appearance settled back down into his usual, lazy, I-don't-give-a-damn manner, I saw his eyes wide and frightened, and I felt his fingers still twisted in my clothes, afraid to let me go, afraid that he was seeing things, afraid that I would disappear out of his life.  
  
***  
  
Rin was in a good mood.  
  
She appeared beaming at her apartment door. Inuyasha had warned me of trouble when we had listened to her ecstatic voice over the phone as we told her of our plans. He told me that she was crazy when she was happy, and I knew from past experiences of my own that he was not lying.  
  
"Kagome! Inuyasha!" She embraced both of us and planted traditional Spanish kisses on our cheeks. She hung out with a European crowd. "Come in!" Rin ushered us both in enthusiastically and guided us through the greeting corridor into the spacious living room. It looked out on the city. Her father had helped her find the apartment; only the best for his little princess.  
  
She bounced out of our sight beyond a corner, and we apprehensively followed. I was just remembering her chirpy comment on the phone. It was obvious by her tone and childish giggles that she was only putting on a show, and an unfortunately badly acted show, of nonchalance.   
  
"So we'll see you in a half an hour, okay Rin? And thanks for having us, we know you've been busy with the art show and-"  
  
"Oh don't mention it Kagome, I can always make time to see my little big brother and his darling sidekick Kagome!" I was too surprised by her chipper attitude and colorful choice of words to acknowledge the fact that I had been called a sidekick. To Inuyasha no less. Rin, meanwhile, continued. "Oh and Kagome, I have a surprise for you and Inuyasha when you come over!" She hung up promptly in a poorly disguised fit of laughter. I'm not sure, but I think she was trying to fake a cough.  
  
I had been too caught up in snickering about Rin's awkward enthusiasm to even process what she had said. Now my carelessness was coming back to bite me in the ass as we stood in the hall. What had she produced this time, a new pet? Rin adored everything that moved. She had a large, violent Iguana named Ah-Uhn that would purr when she touched it or strapped it fondly into its little harness for walks, but threatened to bite the head off of every other living creature in the world. Including her other misfit animal, Jaken. Jaken was a self-conscious frog that would only move when Sesshomaru was around, and seemed to loathe Rin with a passion.  
  
I was stewing over these dear memories when I rounded the corner, and saw instead of a baby alligator or a balding goat, a boy. A boy with red-blond hair and playful green eyes. He was sitting casually on the couch. As Inuyasha and I walked in, he raised a hand in greeting and looked ready to speak when Rin interrupted him. She sidled up behind him and draped her arms around his neck, smiling broadly. "Inuyasha, Kagome," she began, looking affectionately down that the boy, "this is Shippou, my new boyfriend."  
  
He chose this moment to speak for himself, and once again raised his hand, "Hi! Glad to meet you!"  
  
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Inuyasha shift his weight from foot to foot uncomfortably. He was very, very protective of Rin, no matter how much he tried to deny it or ignore it, it was common knowledge. Sesshomaru was the same way, maybe a bit more open about it, but the point was that they both loved their little sister and would not let her go without a fight. Typically, Rin would blame whatever break-up she experienced on herself, and not the obvious; nine times out of ten, her older brothers' persistent meddling was to blame, and the other one time it would be her father's.  
  
I, on the other hand, was looking at this young man sweetly and politely. He looked cute. He seemed to act like Rin. I liked his name, Shippou, it was friendly. He hadn't made a single wrong move that I could see, so I had no problem with him.  
  
  
  
"Hi Shippou!" I walked up to him and extended my hand for a shake. "It's nice to meet you too!" Shippou's smile grew even wider. I turned to Inuyasha, giving him a vicious look over my shoulder.  
  
He folded his arms and sniffed. "Feh."  
  
"Inuyasha!" I hissed angrily. Obviously Shippou posed no threat whatsoever; Inuyasha was just making a big deal of things per usual. I was about to march over to him and slap him around when Rin began laughing.  
  
"Oh don't worry Kagome," She smiled to Inuyasha, "He's just being silly. Aren't Inuyasha?"  
  
He was startled and look ready to say something way out of line again but caught my eye, swallowed, and thought better of his next move. He muttered and shuffled his feet. "Yeah Rin. You know me, a silly guy am I."  
  
  
  
I grinned at him evilly and looked to Rin again. "So Rin, are we still on for the movie? You don't mind independent films, do you Shippou?"  
  
"No I don't mind. I'd be glad to go." How polite he was! Rin had certainly found a nice guy this time. Usually she picked up greasy rock stars, that didn't really have any bad qualities, but no redeemable ones either.  
  
Rin bent down and kissed the top of his head, "Thanks Shippou, you're a sweetheart."  
  
To which he replied, "No, you are!"  
  
My heart almost stopped. How precious! Oh, they were adorable. Inuyasha looked like he wanted to hurl, so I elbowed him in the ribs none to nicely.  
  
"So um..." I interrupted the cuddle fest they were conducting. "What do you want to see?"  
  
"I dunno..." Rin curled a lock of her hair around her index finger. "What's out?"  
  
"I heard about this new film," Shippou began, "about an Indian bride that runs away to France to escape an arranged marriage."  
  
"Well that's new," I said. "Do you know what it's called?"  
  
"Tash...mane...something, I don't know. Some obscure foreign thing."  
  
"That should be enough to go on...I don't want to call the theater, let's just walk over there and hope that it's around." I lifted my purse higher onto my shoulder and grabbed Inuyasha's shoulder in a vice-like grip to force his evil stare away from Shippou. "Alright with you, Inuyasha?" I ground the statement out between my gritted teeth.  
  
"Yes."  
  
Rin hurried into the bathroom to primp for a few minutes and left us alone with Shippou. I forced Inuyasha to speak once or twice, but his comments were clipped and dangerous. I had a distinct feeling that Shippou realized Inuyasha's scorn and was fiendishly using my good graces to both protect himself, and punish Inuyasha. It made me like him even more.  
  
When Rin came out again, we all bustled out of the apartment. As we journeyed toward the elevator, Shippou said, "Oh I have one request, by the way."  
  
"And that is?" I asked.  
  
"That we get candy. I love candy, can't get enough of it."  
  
"A sweet tooth huh? They say that's a sign of sensitivity in guys." I winked at Rin.  
  
Inuyasha muttered, "It's also a sign of-" he ended his remark in a gasp of pain as my fist made contact with his stomach.  
  
"Yes," Rin batted her eyelashes. "They also say, sweets to the sweet!"  
  
Shippou looped her arm with his. "I'm not sweet Rin, you are!"  
  
As soon as we were in the elevator, Inuyasha went straight to a corner with his back to us and began softly banging his head against the wall.  
  
***  
  
Sorry, I realize it's a bit short. Meh. I'm a little tired... Okay, now for the recommendations.  
  
Disease  
  
By psycho pixie  
  
Disease is Sess/Kag, the best one I've ever read. It's hilarious, it's clever, and I've just never read anything quite like it before. I can't even describe it...  
  
Ariels  
  
By psycho pixie  
  
This is the sequel to Disease. I love it, love it, love it. I think it's a riot, and it's got the most original plot I know of for a story on FF.net. For one thing, Kagome discovers that she wasn't the only one who got reincarnated... There's a touch of Naraku/Kagome action, but it's against Kagome's will and so it's only more precious when Sesshomaru comes to save her.  
  
Prisoner, My Prisoner  
  
By profiler120  
  
This is an alternate universe fic in which two powerful royal houses of Japan are at war with each other. Kagome is from one house, Sesshomaru is from the other. I think it's just ridiculously gorgeous and well-written.  
  
Ripples in the Sand  
  
By chickmooget  
  
This is a Trigun fic. It turns out that one of the ships from Earth got in an accident and was destroyed. It was carrying a girl with strange powers and before she was killed her father sent her in an escape pod to Gunsmoke. Vash stumbles onto her just after he comes back with Knives at the end of the series, and well...you do the math.  
  
Myouga Strikes Back  
  
By Myouga Jiji  
  
A cute, funny little story that plainly deserves more attention than it's currently receiving. It's about Myouga, and how he intends to get revenge on Inuyasha and everyone else for his mistreatment in the past.  
  
All That Matters  
  
By feathergurl  
  
This is an Escaflowne fic, it's about how Hitomi discovers that she is actually a Draconian princess. She travels back to Van with her little brother in tow, but they have Dilandau to contend with before they can be at peace.  
  
Moonstruck  
  
By Aiwendil Amaurea  
  
This is so beautiful... Sesshomaru kidnaps Kagome because he has heard of how drinking a healer's blood will restore his arm.  
  
Nine Men and a Little Lady  
  
By Kielle  
  
Oh lord...I laughed so hard when I read this. LOTR fic, it bashes Mary-Sues like no other story I have ever read. Read it.  
  
  
  
Speaking of LOTR humor, I'm a freakish fan, don't get me wrong, but I know of a fantastic parody at the address: http://homepages.nyu.edu/~amw243/diaries/ . MAKE SURE YOU READ THE STUFF BY PSYCHO PIXIE. IT'S FABULOUS. 


	5. The Importance of Being Attractive

Neh...things have been going on. Yawn...* Sorry. Glad you're liking it, will do review responses next chapter.  
  
Disclaimer: Don't own it people. Please don't sue.  
  
***  
  
Chapter 5-The Importance of Being Attractive  
  
***  
  
Inuyasha scoffed. "How did we end up here again?"  
  
I sighed and passed an apologetic look to Shippou and Rin. Leaning in close to him I hissed, "Listen moron, it's this or a romantic comedy. You decide."  
  
"We were supposed to see an Indie," he shot back.  
  
"Be polite asshole! Let them decide! It's their date!"  
  
"But I'm paying!"  
  
"Well that was your own damn fault-"  
  
"I didn't know he would be here!"  
  
"Shippou's a perfect gentleman!"  
  
"He's a perfect-"  
  
"Kagome?"  
  
Rin was tapping me on the shoulder gently and I spun around in a flash with a bright smile. Inuyasha muttered and scowled. "Yes?"  
  
"We're ready to go in now." She had three tickets in her hand along with Inuyasha's wallet. Rin passed them out. Shippou was at her side with his own pass. "Thanks for treating Innie," she beamed.  
  
We followed after her through the crowd of people gathered in the lobby of the theater. Shippou's flaming hair was easily distinguishable up ahead. "Innie?" Inuyasha shrugged.  
  
"Don't look at me. She's never given me a pet name before."  
  
I cackled. "It has a nice ring to it, Innie."  
  
"Zip it Kaggles."  
  
The lights were already dimming as we brushed into the seats. A half hour ago while we were huddled outside the Independent Film House, distraught after walking all the way and finding out that every show was sold-out absurdly, Rin exploded with the almost painful cheerfulness she sometimes unleashed at odd times. "I want to see a play!" She exclaimed.  
  
Inuyasha had cocked his head and taken a long, satisfying drag on his cigarette. "Good luck with that. You'll have to contend with the tourists if you're talking about doing anything today."  
  
He had a point. People came in droves to New York for the express purpose of seeing plays. They felt it was part of the experience. Whatever the "experience" was. And apart from that, I had to be at work for the afternoon shift eventually.  
  
But Rin was looking adamantly opposed to any other options in the way that only Rin can be. Her eyes got big and dewy all of a sudden. Shippou and I just hung back and watched the two siblings interact.  
  
Inuyasha lowered his cigarette with a startled expression. "You're not going to cry are you?"  
  
Rin sniffed grimly and stuck her nose in the air.  
  
Her brother was baffled and looked around at the surrounding public apprehensively. "Come on now Rin, don't cry."  
  
I would have pointed out that she had never actually said she would cry in the first place had it not been so fun to watch.  
  
She folded her arms and turned away from him to watch the cars pass on the street.  
  
"Riiiiiiiiinnnnn," he whined. Inuyasha stepped on his smouldering cigarette and reached out to her but she quickly shuffled away. Once again he glanced at the public as if suddenly mortified that someone might realize he had been the one to temper Rin. "Fine, fine, fine," he shushed.  
  
Rin squealed excitedly and threw her arms around his neck. "Thanks big brother!"  
  
He gagged. "No problem..."  
  
Shippou smiled happily, "so where are we going to go?"  
  
"I know just the place!" Rin giggled. There's this theater near my apartment that just opened, I think we should try it!"  
  
"You mean we have to walk all the way back...?" Inuyasha huffed and pulled out another cigarette accompanied by a lighter. "Dammit."  
  
"Shut up Inuyasha," I chided half-heartedly. "What do they do?"  
  
"It's a group, and they do everything."  
  
"A group?" Shippou looked impressed. "And they do everything? Not just one show?"  
  
  
  
"No, lots, they keep themselves busy."  
  
"Wow I'll say," I put in. Shippou nodded.  
  
Inuyasha puffed in silence for a while and then crushed it again under his foot. "Well then let's get going children. Time's a wastin'."  
  
Now we were seated in the velvety plushness of our seats. Inuyasha was already spitting criticism under his breath with the temper of a wet cat before the show even began, and Rin and Shippou were holding hands at the pinkies. I was in the middle. It was going to be a long show.  
  
The lights went even dimmer, and then faded out all together, leaving the audience in the echoing, stuffy darkness. A few people coughed. It was nearly a full house as far as I could tell. We had been lucky to score tickets after choosing to be so impromptu.  
  
The red curtain that shrouded the lighted stage rolled back revealing a man pacing about in what appeared to be an old English drawing room. Or...tearoom. I was confused for a moment before I remembered that after much argument, especially from Inuyasha, we had walked in for the showing of "The Importance of Being Earnest."  
  
The man was eventually joined by a butler who set a small table with elegant china and silverware when yet another figure entered the room. My eyebrows went up when I saw this one. He was a tall, healthy young man with bright eyes. His hair was reminiscent of Shippou's. When he spoke, his voice was clear and happy. You just couldn't help but smile when you saw him. I checked the program guide in my lap, straining my eyes in the poor light. My smile widened. I liked his name. Quietly under my breath, I whispered it as if it were my secret little treasure.   
  
"Hojo..."  
  
The play continued, and every time Hojo appeared on the stage my eyes automatically followed him around. I blamed what must just be natural talent of his. He was a very good actor. But I couldn't help but wonder what else he was good at...  
  
I watched him fall in love with a pretty actress and felt a pang of jealousy stir in my chest. I saw him kiss her and gripped the armrests until my knuckles turned white. It certainly had to be his talent. He was very talented.  
  
Very talented.  
  
When the show concluded and the curtain fell again the whole audience burst with applause. The show had been excellent. I think. I wasn't really watching the show. I was watching him.  
  
The actors began to assemble on the stage again and joined hands to bow with each wave of wild clapping. Whereas his fellows were smiling modestly, Hojo was flat out grinning, baring a set of splendid teeth. He looked over the audience happily, thanking them silently, and then for a split second, I had probably imagined it, I thought his gaze had rested on me in particular. But it couldn't have been possible. Who was I out of a hundred some people?  
  
His mouth moved and you could just barely hear his "thank you" as it was shouted over the applause before it was inevitably swallowed.  
  
The actors shuffled out after a while. My eyes were still trained on Hojo. I watched him move away and saw his co-star slap him on the back in a congratulatory manner. The lights went on. Inuyasha nudged me. "Let's go Kagome."  
  
I nodded dreamily. "Yeah..."  
  
Shippou and Rin were giggling and snuggling again as we picked our way through the rows of seats and the crowd. The ushers were doing their job at our elbows, guiding everyone along so they could prepare the theater for the next round.  
  
When we got into the lobby I saw that half the crowd was ducking into another room rather than making for the exit. "Where are they going?"  
  
Rin, Shippou, and Inuyasha stopped. Rin peered at them curiously, then turned to a nearby usher. "Excuse me," she said kindly, "Where are those people going?" She indicated the part of the crowd that was branching off.  
  
The usher smiled kindly and replied, "Autographs."  
  
Rin smiled excitedly, thanked him, and returned to us. "Did you hear that?! Autographs!"  
  
Shippou grinned. "Neat!"  
  
Inuyasha shook his head. "No. Way."  
  
Remembering Hojo, I elbowed him in the ribs and glared, "Don't be such a wet blanket, it'll be fun."  
  
He fixed me with a look that questioned my sanity, but I just growled and ground his foot with the heel of my shoe. His mouth opened wide for a cry of pain but I silenced him again with another scathing gaze. "Think of the children darling..." I murmured.  
  
"Let's go!" Rin turned and bounced off to the room with Shippou in tow, while Inuyasha and I followed quietly.  
  
Rin refused to leave until she had gathered signatures from the entire cast, which took a while, but I didn't mind. Hojo was waiting on a rather long line, signing slips of paper, pictures, and programs with admirable dedication. I watched him for a while, as Rin scuttled about and Inuyasha drifted and flirted. Shippou was tagging along with Rin, so I was usually alone; hanging out in a corner or leaning on a wall, staring quietly at Hojo.  
  
I smiled softly when a mother lifted her small daughter to him so that he could sign whatever she had brought. He was being a lovely guy, speaking to her in a playful voice and making her laugh gleefully. Before she and her mother left he shook her hand. As they went and I watched them go, still in my happy daze, Hojo momentarily looked straight at me. This time there was no mistaking it, no imagining it. He looked at me and froze, then after a moment of surprise he smiled, and I blushed suddenly and turned away. Stupid me.  
  
At that exact moment Rin suddenly took my elbow. "Okay Kagome! Ready to go?"  
  
Startled for only a moment, I saw that Inuyasha and Shippou were behind her, and then looked back hesitantly at Hojo. My spirits fell depressingly when I saw him back to work with autographs.  
  
"Yeah...Let's go."  
  
We turned and walked out slowly, it was hard to navigate through the sea of people. I was glum and sad all of a sudden; I pretended to myself that it was just one of my random mood swings again, but I knew that wasn't true.  
  
"Miss!"  
  
It was just a guy. I hadn't even talked to him yet. I knew his name because I had read it out of a program. There was no reason and no logic to getting worked up over him.  
  
"Miss!"  
  
It was stupid. Who need straight guys anyway? Was he even straight?  
  
"Miss!"  
  
And who was doing that? It was ridiculous, and terribly annoying. If you wanted someone's attention then call them by name.  
  
"Miss!"  
  
It was closer, and it occured to me that I knew the voice. It was actually very familiar. I turned out curiosity and saw that Hojo was plowing through the crowd, muttering soft "sorry's" and "excuse me's" as he went. I expected him to continue past us, but he stopped right in front of me, still in full costume. We watched each other for a second. He was looking almost stupidly happy. I probably looked imposing as usual. Then he recovered his wits.  
  
"Um...Miss, I'm sorry, erm...but..." I looked at him inquiringly. "May I ask, um, what is your name?"  
  
I was baffled, almost too baffled to respond. My voice was meek and soft when I responded. "Ka-Kagome Higurashi."  
  
He gave me a full grin and repeated it slowly, "Kagome..." Then he cleared his throat. "Erm, I, I'm-"  
  
"Hojo," I finished for him.  
  
He looked surprised. "How did you know my name?"  
  
I waved the program for him to see.  
  
"Oh!"  
  
Now it was my turn to clear my throat, and I almost whispered, "That was an excellent performance, Hojo."  
  
His smile grew wide again, "Thank you! That means a lot to me."  
  
  
  
We were silent for a moment again. I was aware of Rin, Inuyasha, and Shippou watching us curiously.  
  
"Well um I...I saw you, um, in the crowd, Kagome. And ahhh...I saw you, here and well, you, well, you have this, this, face, I," my head shot up, and so did his. Apparently we had both been looking at our shoes for a while. He recovered. "I think it would be perfect for...for this part..."  
  
"Part?"  
  
"Yeah um...Romeo and...Juliet. You, you look perfect for..." I waited patiently for him to continue. He swallowed, "For Juliet."  
  
I smiled and even exposed some of my teeth. "R-Really? You really think so?"  
  
"Yeah," he whispered. Hojo's look of stupidity faded and he snapped back to reality. "Of course you'd have to try out because you're not in the...the group. Try out for the group I mean, but, I think, Kagome, that you'd be really great..." And he slipped back into it again.  
  
I couldn't respond.  
  
Inuyasha suddenly yanked me back by my shoulder. "Yo Kagome, let's go."  
  
Hojo took one look at Inuyasha and his appearance changed a bit from bright to forlorn. I shoved Inuyasha away from me without looking at him. "D-Don't mind him, please."  
  
"Kagome..." Inuyasha was whispering in my ear in a condescending tone. "You have fifteen minutes to get to work."  
  
My back straightened and my eyes grew wide. I snatched Inuyasha's wrist and glared at his watch with a little "eep."  
  
"Quick," I snapped, "Gotta go! We have to leave right now!"  
  
"Well duh," Inuyasha muttered.  
  
"Shut up!" I made a dash towards the door but stopped when I heard Hojo calling me again.  
  
He was looking at me with another lovely smile on his lips. Then he looked desperate for an instant. "Hey, will you please promise me that you will try out?"  
  
"Yes!" I returned the smile. "I promise Hojo!" And then I was gone.  
  
***  
  
Seven minutes later I was in my apartment hopping around on one foot trying to squeeze my toes into a black high-heeled shoe. Inuyasha was lying on my bed with a sucker in his mouth watching me closely. There was quiet amusement in his eyes.  
  
"That Hojo guy was pretty cute..." He threw the sucker into a trash can under my night stand.  
  
"Paws off," I muttered.  
  
He raised a single eyebrow. "Oh? Taken an interest have ye?"  
  
I finally popped my heel into the shoe and made a dash to for the chair on the other side of the room on which my blouse was hanging. "An interest in what?"  
  
"Don't be coy. With Hojo, dink."  
  
The blouse slithered over my shoulders and I quickly buttoned it down over my bra. "Don't be ridiculous," I snapped. "It's much too...soon."  
  
"Yes..." His eyes became soft. "That's my concern."  
  
"How do you mean?" My hair was disheveled so I sprinted into the bathroom.  
  
He was noticeably silent. Ominously silent. When I peered at him around the corner curiously he looked startlingly serious and worried. His eyes were half-lidded, and lacked their usual malice.  
  
"Inuyasha?"  
  
He sighed and looked down. "You're going to be late for work Kagome."  
  
***  
  
When I went into work I was practically skipping, despite Inuyasha's disturbing behavior. It was amazing, record time, I had made it back to my apartment and to the office in just fifteen minutes, but that was not what had put me in such a good mood.  
  
Riba whistled when I flopped into my chair.  
  
"What's gotten into you?"  
  
I fluffed my hair, "Riba do you think I'd make a good actor?"  
  
She gave me a queer look. "Are you okay?"  
  
"Yes I'm fine. Why do you ask?"  
  
"You're acting funny."  
  
"I am?" I considered it for a moment. "Was I acting funny...well?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Was I acting well?"  
  
She blinked. "Are you sure you're okay?"  
  
"I'm fine."  
  
She shook her head while she turned away slowly. "Whatever you say..."  
  
I looked down thoughtfully at my pile of paperwork for the day. I had been neglecting it for some time, and it just continued to mount every day I did. And it didn't look like today was going to be any different. Instead of starting on my work, I simply stared at it for a while, thinking. Then I abruptly lifted the phone.  
  
Riba turned around, "What are you doing?"  
  
I didn't answer her. "Hello, operator? Can you please give me the address and number of the Amour Theater?" I grabbed a small writing pad and pencil from somewhere on my messy desk and wrote quickly. "Yes...alright...Thank you very much! Yes." I set the phone down again and tore off the piece of paper.  
  
"You know you're not supposed to use the phone for personal calls," Riba said softly.  
  
"I know. But I left my cell phone at home by accident." The paperwork was hanging over my head, so I looked at it again sharply, as if it would disappear if I stared hard enough. Then I slapped my knees.  
  
"You know what? I think I'll just call them right now."  
  
Riba said nothing.  
  
I picked up the phone and dialed the number on the paper. For half a second as I let it ring I imagined that maybe Hojo might pick it up and somehow be the one to answer...  
  
"Hello, Amour Theater, how may I help you?"  
  
It wasn't him. It was a girl. My spirits fell considerably and I forgot to talk.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
Clearing my throat I gathered myself up again. "Yes, um, I was wondering if you might be holding any auditions soon?"  
  
"We don't hold auditions for plays. If you want to act, you have to audition for the Amour Theater Group."  
  
"Yes I know, I'd love to try out if that's possible."  
  
"It's entirely possible. We're holding an open audition on Friday, you must be at least 21. Call backs are the day after. Would you like to sign up now?"  
  
"Yes, thank you."  
  
"Name please."  
  
"Kagome Higurashi."  
  
I gave my phone number, address, age, date of birth, and a number of other minute details. When we were finished with our mini-interview, she bid me goodbye and I thanked her.  
  
  
  
When I had finished my call I reached into my purse and brought out a small mirror. Holding it with one hand and letting my hair loose from its bun I examined my reflection carefully. "Riba, do you think I'd make a good Juliet?"  
  
***  
  
Yeah, I know it's a short chapter...Sorry. But it just felt like a nice place to end it. Next chapter will probably be longer. I think yes. Hopefully. Good. Have a nice day everybody! Remember review responses next chapter, so if you have any questions, ask me now. 


	6. Si Bête

Ha ha ha. Gotcha didn't I? Weren't expecting that were you? Ha! Wow I'm so. Cool. HA! In other news, I'm quite pleased with your reactions, carry on.  
  
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This chapter is dedicated to the splendid authoress Chickmooget who had a birthday a little while ago. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOOGET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! In honor of this momentous occasion, I want all of you to go out and leave her a happy birthday review please. I know it would make her very happy, even if it's stupidly late. And it would be a fantastic good deed for any of you out there who are hoping to escape the fiery depths of hell in the afterlife. YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.  
  
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As promised, review responses for chapters 4 and 5 and in this case, the other thing. I intend to do it this way from now on, responding to reviews from the past two chapters, but chances are I won't remember if you post a review in an earlier chapter to respond to it. It's not that I don't care, it's that I have the memory of a goldfish.  
  
RED DAY: Yeah sure. Kag and Hojo...whatever you say. Maybe. Maybe not...  
  
acrimsonnight: I'm not saying. I keep my secrets about coupling...it's just more fun that way. Glad you're liking the story. Thanks for the support about BLAH. I share your hatred for he/she/it. I didn't really let it get to me, I just sort of got frustrated; I mean, what do you say to someone like that? Thanks again!  
  
Tori: Yes, I'm very good with twists. They are my speciality. Have to keep you guys on your toes you know. Of course Hojo wants to play Romeo, sort of a dead giveaway, but hey, who said he would actually get the part? I didn't. But then again I never said he wouldn't get the part either...  
  
Rabid-Inu-Girl: Yeah...the object was to make everyone sick with the fluff from Shippou and Rin. I'm glad at least that I got the desired effect no? As for your latest comment about the pairings... Maybe. ~_^  
  
Tsuki Yume: Glad you're liking it.  
  
Choas Babe: You're darn right. GO SHIPPOU!  
  
Kagura Fanel: Dip. Bollywood. Asian Hollywood. We've already gone over this so I won't repeat myself further. Actually, I don't know how you could have missed it with your impeccable perception of the world around you, but Inuyasha is entirely and without a doubt, straight. Sheesh Kagura, everyone else got that real quick. I guess you're just behind as usual. (And why do you think I put it in a chapter that you and everyone else would see? Does it LOOK like I would mind the name "Kaggles?" Shnikies KAGURA.) ^_~ HAHAHA! See? If you posted your stuff you would get to do this to people. It ROCKS!  
  
Tiffany: The title of the story means, "Do You Want to Meet Me?" The title of the second chapter is, "I Am No One's Little Weasel." This chapter means, "So Silly." Good luck with Spanish!  
  
Sylaera: I'm delighted that you like the story. It's funny how Inuyasha being gay all started out... I have a female friend that I call Inuyasha, and well, watching the series, I saw that she wasn't getting any of the action she wanted, so I got the idea to write a story just for her in which she could enjoy all the male company she desired. And I totally agree, I should be getting waaaaaay more attention. When are people ever going to realize that it's ALL ABOUT ME? Dammit! ~_^  
  
Myouga Jiji: Yes you have heard that before. ~_^ Had to name her something different tho to respect her privacy and all that. And how does it feel being an insider? Knowing the connections and what not? Isn't it fun? As for BLAH, what's done is done, I have no idea what "The Message" is from anyway. ?  
  
sashlea: Ahhhhhh, gotcha. I'll do that with the recommendations, yes. It makes sense. Thanks for the tip!  
  
renamangga: Thanks for the support. And what the hell, he/she/it probably won't see it, true, but let's post it for them anyway, shall we? From, renamangga to BLAH: ahem,  
  
I'm sorry you think that about this fic, but you really need to learn to a.) be nicer about things, b.) only flame if you have the courage to sign, c.) shut your trap, and d.) all of the above. To be quite honest, I'd rather read about Inuyasha's homosexual escapades than read anything by someone so close-minded and rude as you. And just as an ending note, it doesn't make you cool to say things like that.  
  
What she said.  
  
Peenya Kowlada: Oh what a darling review! Yes, Kikyo is absent. I think the world had had enough of her when she died the first time. No need to revive such repetitive drama neh? She might make a brief cameo later if I need some random extra to fall off a building or something. And I know there was a lot of swearing in the first chapter...but hey, it's New York. Oh by the way, I'm glad you picked up on the jumping plot line. You know I was killing myself over that for a long time. I didn't know if it was going to fast, or going to slow, or getting too boring or too dramatic...It's nice to hear some positive input about that. Thanks again for the review!  
  
Gwen: Hoo hoo ha ha, neat! Such excellent praise! I'm most flattered, thank you. I figured Inuyasha needed a change, and what better way to change him than by reversing his sexual preferences? HA!  
  
koinu-no-ai: Oh...thank you. *a single tear rolls down her cheek* Your words are touching. If you can bring up such good points in a review I may just have to check out your story... ^ ^  
  
Fate Bringer: I agree, no need to bite people's heads off for writing. Be nice in reviews, sheesh. But even so, they probably did mean all gay people. Because if he hates Inuyasha being gay, he probably hates everyone else being gay too. And someone brought up a good point to me that the whole Inuyasha series is based on the power of love and how blind it is; demons and humans and what not. There's even the gay character Jakotsu later on. So that person must just not be a true Inuyasha fan...pity. Thanks for the review!  
  
Sesshyangel: I would assume New Yorkers do. To be honest, I've never even visited New York in my entire life, which is why you don't see many specific addresses in the story ^ ^. I've written this based on my frequent trips to Chicago. I have a sister going to college there, and I figure it's gotta be just as vile as New York so might as well work with it.  
  
Tsuki Yume: I'll try to update fast...no promises though. Thanks for the review!  
  
***  
  
Chapter 6-Si Bête  
  
***  
  
For the next few days I was puttering around madly. As far as I knew, there was nothing I needed to bring to the audition except myself. But that automatically created a requirement that I with my exquisite fashion sense could not ignore. A new outfit. It had to be perfect, it just had to be.   
  
Far back in my memory when I had first moved to New York I recalled feeling the driving need to become a contributing member of society despite the more-than-adequate financial support my parents were feeding me from across various locations. It was nothing compared to what Inuyasha was being backed with, but it was still something. A big something. At any rate, after being locked in a boarding school for a majority of my young-adult life I was delighted with the prospect of being able to support myself. Everyone else was doing it, I had to join the trend. And the moment I did would be a special one, with the essential outfit.  
  
When I had secured a job interview at the office building I now dragged myself to on a semi-regular basis, I used the week leading up to the occasion to search for the right clothes. The entire week.  
  
Now, however, I had Inuyasha. Inuyasha was a freak of nature. He could smell Christian Dior a mile away. And he turned his nose up at prices frequently because he knew exactly where he could find the same blouse at a dingy thrift store without the extra one-thousand dollars. Being a fashion major, he knew everything that was anything to do with clothes of any sort, shape, kind, or era. He truly devoted himself to his craft, and I had to admit that the creations he turned out while spending hours a day locked in the small sewing room of our apartment were quite nice.  
  
The audition was always on my mind; every hour and second of the day. After the first-moment adrenalin rush had begun to subside, I paused to reconsider my sudden ecstacy. Why was I so excited? Why was I even auditioning in the first place? Did I really want to be an actor? Had I dreamed about it my entire life and just not realized it?  
  
Immediately a reason snapped itself into place, but I ignored it. Certainly Hojo was a decent guy, hell he was a downright hometown bashful gentleman. You just wanted to pinch his cheeks. But honestly, I wasn't really doing this for him, was I? It would be insulting to my character, to go to such trouble for a guy...  
  
Again.  
  
Therein lied the fact that proved my reluctance to join the group for Hojo's sake was legit. Kouga still lurked in my heart like a taunting spirit. He was not about to abandon my soul anytime soon, it wasn't like I had suddenly become a happy, frolicking young woman again. I had been in love with Kouga. I was not, however, in love with Hojo.  
  
It was my belief that I was going into this thing as a type of therapy. It was probably just what I needed to relax and forget the past. It was just what I needed to make it possible for me to really, finally move on.  
  
***  
  
"Inuyasha you ready?" I yanked my jeans up and buttoned them.  
  
"Just a minute..." His voice echoed over to me from the other side of the apartment.  
  
I bit my lip with excited glee. How stupid I had been to waste a week of my life away sniffling in bed just a few days ago...Especially when there were so many things I still had to do! My lip-biting was in vain, and I was soon giggling stupidly. When Inuyasha came in, he found me sprawled out on my bed wiping tears from my eyes.  
  
"You're a freak," he commented innocently.  
  
I laughed softly and slowly until I was totally calmed down again. "Ohhhhh...." My head went up and I swung my legs over the side of the bed. "Ready to go?"  
  
He nodded in response and I clapped my hands enthusiastically. "Great. Where first?"  
  
Inuyasha blinked stupidly, then clicked back. "Oh. Um, BCBG."  
  
"There?" I was astonished. We hadn't been to BCBG in a while. We hadn't been to BCBG for months. Time spent together had dwindled substantially when I got engaged to Kouga.  
  
"Why not? It's got just what you need."  
  
My voice went up a tone. "Really?" It was terribly expensive. And to my knowledge it didn't exactly offer the semi-business attire I would have preferred for the occasion of my audition.  
  
"Sure. You love BCBG, and they just released their new summer collection.  
  
"Yeah I do but, do you really think they'll have what I'm looking for? I mean, I really need them to understand that I'm serious about this." I fluffed my hair.  
  
He rolled his eyes slowly and huffed. His hands on his hips, he sized me up with his eyes momentarily and then proceeded to snatch my wrist and drag me straight to my own closet. I sensed my own doom on the horizon felt a shudder of fear race through me.  
  
The closet doors were thrown open. "Observe." He pointed at my neatly organized clothing and then when I shrugged in answer he proceed to dishevel all of my hard work. Cashmere sweaters and silk skirts were hurled over his shoulder without hesitation. Eventually he came to a stop and held a nice jean jacket embroidered with daisies timidly in front of him as if it were crawling with disease.  
  
"What the hell is this?"  
  
I twitched sharply at his tone. There was no stopping him when he decided to rifle through my wardrobe, but I drew the line when he sniffed at my clothes so coldly. Without even giving them a chance! Hey, I liked daisies! They're cute! "It happens to be a jacket your royal wise-ass."  
  
"It's not a jacket, it's a monstrosity!"  
  
"Hey!"  
  
He continued. "And when you're not wearing something as ridiculous as this in public, you insist on prancing back and forth in lavender business suits! LAVENDER!" Inuyasha waved the hated jacket around frantically for emphasis.  
  
"I like lavender!"  
  
"Yeah well all shades of purple make you look like an eggplant."  
  
"HEY!"  
  
"I'm just a messenger of the truth Kagome." He tossed the jacket away and added, "When you look good it's because I have to spend an hour coyly advising you to wear this with this and that with that in a way that won't insult you too much."  
  
"I think I'm fine. I wear all the best designers."  
  
"In the wrong way."  
  
"Shut up. I'm not changing for you." I folded my arms and spun away from him with my nose in the air like a child. We were both children.  
  
As he continued to throw away various articles of clothing, he muttered softly, "Couldn't if you tried."  
  
I turned back, my mouth agape. "What did you say?"  
  
"You heard me," he spat. "I dare you to change."  
  
I fumed. "Why should I?!"  
  
"Because it's necessary!"  
  
"I'm not going to!"  
  
"You couldn't handle it!"  
  
"Oh? Wanna bet?!"  
  
"Sure!"  
  
"Fine! Twenty dollars!"  
  
"Fifty!"  
  
"Deal!" I puffed up by a good margin and glared at him with all my might. Little bitch. If he hated that jacket so much he good shove it where the sun don't shine. Or if there wasn't enough room in there next to the giant stick he could stuff it in the source of never-ending space, his big fat mouth.  
  
He got to his feet with the jacket in hand again. "First thing: You are going to get rid of this."  
  
***  
  
Up until that day, no one had actually told me I had a problem with fashion. I didn't even suspect. I just strutted around as if there was absolutely nothing wrong with my teal cashmere sweater/violet shirt-dress ensemble. I didn't find anything particularly repulsive about Inuyasha's taste either, which you would have suspected considering that he had just accused me of having horrendous taste. But I didn't. Yet the more I thought about it, I supposed that it was true; I never dressed like he did, and he allegedly had great taste. When I purchased fine designer clothing, whether the occasional real thing or a thrift shop product, and I did purchase them often, I didn't really put things together the way Inuyasha did.  
  
After a while, having been exposed to these things, they started to bother me deeply, and I spent most of our grim ride on the subway in deep thought, delving into this trivial issue that interested no one but us. After much thinking, it dawned on me that I had been scammed, and I peered over at Inuyasha to see him smirking with a smug look on his face. I resisted the urge to hit him forcefully.  
  
My anger seethed and boiled to its peak, but then gradually sank. At least I was getting fifty dollars out of it. Inuyasha had to have faith in this operation if he was willing to sacrifice a fifty for it. He was oddly stuck-up when it came to money. There was always the possibility that I would fail to complete the transition he had in mind, but I was not about to bow down to him, whatever it took. He obviously knew that...It made me wonder why he wanted so badly for me to switch myself around at this particular time. Perhaps it had something to do with Kouga; maybe he thought I should cleanse myself of the life I had had with him. I might really have to change after all, for my own emotional health; and if I had to change, I had to change. Might as well get some cash from it.  
  
Even if it was just clothes, I was still apprehensive, no matter how hard I tried to conceal it. Never once had I stepped out of character enough to wear a really scantily revealing top, and I didn't favor tight jeans either, because one of my most uncomfortable and closest secrets was that I highly disliked going commando, and I had never in my life even tried on a thong. They gave me the creeps.  
  
Besides, my wardrobe was part of me. I had spent my life in a religious girls school bedecked in a ridiculous uniform. The thing was an embarrassment: white shirt with green collar and a pleated green skirt that didn't allow you to bend down, plus a red ribbon holding it all together. And knee-socks. Please. Being a senior in that get-up was not one of my fondest memories.  
  
But despite my hatred of the flimsy thing, it inspired a need to keep to the plain attire in me. Having grown up wearing and in the constant presence of the uniform, I found myself unable to escape it, even after I had moved to New York. It was like it was laughing at me. I kept to the dull stuff and couldn't bring myself to buy even the most amateur of flashy outfits.  
  
This change was going to be even more of a change than I had previously thought. Imagine it had all started out with me wanting a new outfit for my audition. Sheesh, I would never go back to Inuyasha for fashion help again.   
  
***  
  
BCBG. Maxazria, BCBG. A prestigious fashion house, fairly expensive, Inuyasha was totally convinced that this was the place. He wouldn't listen to a word I said, and rolled his eyes when I told him it was too pricey. "Live a little..." He muttered.  
  
"Every time you say that and I listen to you I get closer to death."  
  
Again he rolled his eyes, and this time added an over-dramatic sigh for fun. I threw up my arms in disgust. The store was looming in front of us, tucked away neatly in a Nordstrom's. It wasn't that expensive, not compared to the other countless times I'd splurged, but I was still apprehensive nonetheless. I mean, reminding yourself that you could buy a shirt at BCBG for the same price from Eileen Fisher reduced the thrill of buying it.  
  
"Come on sweetie," he grabbed my wrist and dragged me towards the entrance. Why couldn't I have contracted a cold? Why did I accept his bet? Why hadn't the train stalled and why oh why hadn't there been a psycho killer riding with us to slow things down? "Come on," Inuyasha said again, a bit more sternly.  
  
Biting my lip, I allowed myself to be pulled inside, where the bright lights immediately sparkled in my eyes. While I passed a hand over my vision for shade, I asked, "What now slick?"  
  
"What now? Dear child I'm going to take you on the ride of a lifetime." He scuttled to a rack of fluffy summer dresses and pawed through them with expectant looks in my direction.  
  
I groaned and dragged my feet to him. Upon reaching his side he promptly shoved a few things into my arms. "Wow, should I go to the changing rooms now? That was fast..."  
  
His eyebrows went up, "I hope you have more energy than that, we're just getting started."  
  
***  
  
I loafed in a plush chair near a rack of belts-brooding silently. Inuyasha was like some sort of insect, an ant perhaps, gathering food for the colony. He scuttled around in a jittery manner; head bobbing up and down every so often from between rows of blazers and skirts. And amazingly, for such a willowy body, he could carry many times his own weight. Heaps of clothes were piled in his arms, and I could see the attendants from behind the counter flinching every time he sniffed and threw an expensive shirt onto his pile as if it were little more than a rag.  
  
For about the umpteenth time, you'd have thought he'd have noticed the trend by now, a nervous store-keeper approached him tentatively. "May I help you sir?"  
  
"What?" He observed her around the layers of clothing he held in his arms. "Oh...no, I'm fine thank you."  
  
The girl hung around him anyway, reaching out anxiously whenever she saw the mountain tottering and making soft mewling sounds. Inuyasha's head was darting around. "Kagome? Hey! Where are you?"  
  
I raised my hand where I sat, "Over here. Done yet?"  
  
"I think so..." He made his way in the direction of my voice. "Did I miss anything?"  
  
My eyes swished up and down the pile darkly. "No."  
  
"Where's the stuff I told you to hold on to?" Inuyasha's voice was half-muffled as he tried to speak around the clothes.  
  
Sighing, I gathered the few dresses I had been watching over for the past forty-five minutes. Being a weak, uninterested soul, I had quit after fifteen, and made myself comfortable in the depth of a chair positioned between the belts and the hats.  
  
He inspected the dresses I held carefully, then his yellow eyes glistened in approval and his enthusiasm was renewed with even greater intensity than before. "Wonderful," he chirped, "Ready to try stuff on?"  
  
I felt the blood seep out of my face coldly. "Try it...on? All of it?"  
  
"Well of course! What did you think we were going to do for the next three hours? Window-shop?" He snorted. "Please."  
  
Cursing, struggling to find a way out of the situation, my eyes strayed desperately to the clerks, but they were giving me evil eye venomously; accusing me of not stopping him when he had been in a mad rush through their store. I was stranded.  
  
"But..." Anything. What would get me out of it? Anything. Please. "Work! I have to be at work!"  
  
His golden eyes rolled upwards towards the ceiling. "You don't have to be at work for another four hours. That leaves plenty of time."  
  
"No! You see, I um...No!"  
  
"Don't try to escape now...I know where you live." Inuyasha allowed some of the clothes off the top of the hill to spill into my arms, and I groaned.  
  
"Inuyaaaaaaashaaaaaaaa..."  
  
"No whining!" He scolded. "To the dressing rooms! Scoot!"  
  
"I'll unlock that for you." A young female clerk, the same one that had been sidling up to Inuyasha not so long ago with a pained expression, came forth with a key dangling in her hand. She brushed past us with the stalking grace of a cat. An evil cat. "I'm happy to help." She glared sternly at both of us with a mocking smile and giggled at me with a false laugh as she bent and unlocked the door to the nearest dressing room and gestured for me to enter.  
  
"A ha ha ha..." My eyes were also narrowed. Bitch. Assisting in my doom. Bitch.  
  
"Please, call if you need anything." She retreated again, losing none of her predatory elegance.  
  
Bitch.  
  
My gaze was trained on her as she returned to her post by the counter and began to chat with a co-worker. They were snickering and looking at us. The moment was interrupted, however, when I felt something hit me in the backside, and I knew immediately that Inuyasha was continuing to impatiently urge me to get into the room.  
  
"Goooooooooo!"  
  
"Hold it princess, I'm moving, I'm moving." Grumbling all the way, I moved into the changing room.  
  
"Take these with you!"  
  
I turned just in time to get a jumble of clothes thrown in my face. Shocked by the force, I stumbled backwards a bit and collided with the wall behind me in a loud thump. I couldn't suppress the wave of curses that spewed from my lips as I considered all the abuse my butt was taking. The laughter of the salesgirls rose in the background.  
  
"Hurry up now!" Inuyasha smiled and waved as he began to shut the door. "I'd come in with you, but between you and your possible apparel I don't think there would be much room." With that delightful parting comment, he shut the door firmly and left me wallowing in a heap of expensive fabrics.  
  
"Screw you," I hissed.  
  
"Don't forget to show me everything."  
  
"Shut up."  
  
He sniggered from behind the door. Growling once more, I carefully pulled a silk dress away from the pile. It was a lovely, delicate, not to mention see-through thing. Flowers sprawled down from the top left corner of it to the bottom right. Beautiful flowers. The dress itself was beautiful. And probably expensive too.  
  
Sighing again, stupidly, I stripped down in front of the mirror and carefully slid the flimsy material over my skin.  
  
"Show me," Inuyasha barked.  
  
Frowning as I learned an anatomy lesson about myself that I shouldn't have learned while "dressed," I responded, "Is there something I should be wearing under this?"  
  
***  
  
Fifteen billion shirts, dresses, jeans, and combinations of them later, I was nearing the end of the torture. Inuyasha had finally given in and joined me in the changing room. Technically, every piece of clothing had been fitted to my flesh. I was through with that. Now for the tricky business, Inuyasha had to scan through everything again, using his excellent memory to remember what had looked reasonable and what hadn't.  
  
I sniffed haughtily and stood with my arms extended as he held a something to me.  
  
Suddenly his face lit up. "I think we have a winner."  
  
My expression immediately changed from painfully and desperately bored to astounded. I had been losing hope of seeing the world outside of the dressing room again. But could it be? Had he finally reached a conclusion?  
  
"You serious?"  
  
Still grinning, he stooped and collected a pair of tight fitting navy blue-denim pants and a few other garments, then rose again. "Here you are!"  
  
I accepted the small bundle happily. "This...is so great..."  
  
"Go, go!" He was jumping around excitedly in the confined space. "Try it on, try it on!"  
  
Looking down at the carefully selected items, I remembered them all, but not particularly. They hadn't stood out in my mind as being anything fantastically stupendous. "You sure about this?"  
  
"Well if you'd rather go through everything again..."  
  
Not wasting anymore time with words I nearly tore off my clothing in my haste. First I squeezed into the pants. At first I thought I had grown several inches, but presently I realized that they were clam-diggers. The were dark denim with a lighter shade of the same fabric sewn around the bottom of the pant-legs. The pockets and zipper were announced with strips of white fabric.  
  
"Top?" Inuyasha passed me something white. I turned it over in my hands for a moment, and then slipped it on. It was a spaghetti strapped shirt made of white linen. The fabric was course and rough, and should have been thick and heavy, but it was instead light and semi-transparent. My skin shone beneath it with a bright, youthful sort of glow. All in all, it was a nice enough summer outfit.  
  
"This it?" I asked.  
  
Smiling, Inuyasha produced one last item that I hadn't seen before or recalled trying on. "I found this while you were experimenting," He was still grinning impishly when he helped me shrug into it. "Don't know how I could have possibly missed anything, but I did." His curious behavior failed to irk me, as Inuyasha had a habit of acting weird at equally weird moments.   
  
It was a jacket, a beige, sort of green jacket with tan lines of thread cris-crossing all over it form a checkerboard effect. It had three-quarter sleeves and fanned out a bit around my torso with a pink zipper. Very retro. Every bit of it fit me perfectly. I was not impressed.  
  
"Isn't it beautiful?" Inuyasha primped the clothes dutifully; pinching the sleeves affectionately. I shuffled my feet in the stray clothes crowded on the floor. Then he slipped some shoes onto my feet that were white with high heels and resembled damaged spider-webs.  
  
"Well?"  
  
"Um...It's great." I was lying, and he knew it. As I stared down my reflection in the mirror I just couldn't see myself anywhere. Nothing was me. Sure I whore designer stuff, sure I swung for a form-fitting thing once in a while, but this thing that I was wearing now...It just wasn't me.  
  
Inuyasha's face fell, and I prepared to face the music and the loss of a good fifty-dollars. "Is it really that bad?"  
  
"No, no," I shushed, waving my hands. "It's just that...well..."  
  
"It's not what you usually wear?" Never once did his tone become smarmy, never once did he make the slightest action to imply that he was going to rub my failure in as much as possible.  
  
I hung my head and whispered, "I'm sorry..." His hands left my shoulders. "Guess you'll be wanting that fifty dollars now huh?"  
  
"Don't worry about it." He was smiling again, but with far less enthusiasm than a few minutes ago. "I tried..."  
  
Again I mumbled my apologies and gently eased out of the jacket. Next the top went over my head, then the pants. When I was back in my own clothes, I found a strange satisfaction and comfort that I hadn't been aware of for a long time. But with the gladness came a nagging regret.  
  
I was ready to leave, but Inuyasha claimed he needed to buy some shirt or belt or whatever, so he stayed and politely turned down my offer to remain with him; telling me to go get us some lunch at the café directly across from the store. I obeyed and ordered us salads and tea, feeling for whatever reason that I needed to cleanse myself with healthy food.  
  
Inuyasha came in with a white BCBG bag. A very big BCBG bag. Far too big for a belt or shirt, or even both. I leaned over the table as he sat down seemingly as far away from me as possible. "What's in there?" I asked.  
  
His eyes flashed for a second and he stabbed a pepper roughly with his fork. "Just some things."  
  
Inuyasha could act jolly, he could act like an idiot, he could act like a psycho or a jerk or anything but a bashful guy. Whenever he turned even the faintest shade or red or showed the smallest sign of uncertainty, you could be sure that something was up.  
  
"Come on, what's in there?" I pressed.  
  
He pressed back. "N-None of your business."  
  
My curiosity raised to its peak, I once again pushed myself up from my chair to see down into the bag. He pushed it behind his seat with his foot, so I hopped up and ran over in an attempt to snatch it. But just as my hand came down for the handle, he slid it under the table and my fist closed empty on the air.  
  
"No way." His fork resumed its quest through his greens without another word from him.  
  
Pouting childishly, I dragged my feet back to my chair and flopped down on it with my arms folded. After watching him sourly for a few seconds and trailing his first bite with my eyes as it traveled to his mouth, I sprang up and dove under the table, sending the glassware trembling. People turned shyly to observe the mad woman who was crouching on all fours under a table.  
  
Inuyasha dropped his silverware abruptly and swooped down after me, contributing to the scene we were making; but I swooped up again before he could catch me, this time with the bag in hand. "Ah-ha!" I cried triumphantly while simultaneously driving my hand into the BCBG clothing. He was still in hot pursuit, and once he had disentangled himself from the chair and table legs Inuyasha was blindly snatching at my hand, trying to stay it before it revealed his purchases.  
  
My gleeful sniggering stopped suddenly when my eyes rested on the first thing I had pulled from the bag. The jacket was dangling from my fingertips, still half-wrapped in tissue paper. Inuyasha made an attempt to snatch his things back but I yanked them from his reach with my attention still glued on the jacket. My mouth hung open and I wordlessly set the jacket down after a while, sifting through the bag again. I was searching for the receipt, and on my way I saw the rest of the outfit, along with several of the summer dresses I had tried on also folded neatly inside. Eventually I drew out the slip of paper. His total had come to roughly $600.00.  
  
"I'm not taking anything back!" He growled.  
  
I stared at him. "Then what are you going to do with it?"  
  
Inuyasha hesitated again. "I was going to give it to you..." He pulled back the bag and all its contents, taking the receipt from my grip. "When the time was right."  
  
My confidence came back a little, and I started to reply smartly, "Then I'll take it ba-" I couldn't finish. Inuyasha had spent six-hundred dollars on me. Even for friends, even for wealthy friends, that was still saying something. That was saying a lot.   
  
"Why do you want to change me?" I wasn't trying at all to be mean, and he understood that and handled my statement calmly.  
  
"I'm not trying to change you...not that way. I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't think that you might like it if you gave it a real try." He stared me down with his piercing eyes. "I'm only trying to help you." His nails clicked on the table as he rolled his fingers in impatience and frustration; searching for the right words. "Just think of...think of it as experimentation...exploration. Okay?"  
  
After much inner debate, and finding no other solution, I settled on a simple, well-worn phrase of mine, "Thank you."  
  
***  
  
The clothes felt strange in my hands. I sat on the bed, listening to the noises of the city outside. Work had been slow and repetitive. When I came home dragging my feet I took a shower and changed into my pajamas, intending to go to bed early.  
  
Yet after several hours of staring up at the ceiling watching the blades of the fan swirl before my eyes I got up and brought the white bag out from its hiding place under my night stand. It was ridiculous, getting so worked up over a few outfits. All I ever did was overreact. And I had lost enough sleep already in the past week. There was absolutely no reason to pursue the trend with as trivial a matter as clothing.  
  
But I did. It was easy to see that the outfits were symbolic. To me, it seemed that if I gave in and wore them, I would be warping my entire image. That could possibly mean disregarding Kouga. It could possibly mean scoring Hojo.  
  
But did I really want Hojo? Would it really change me that much to wear something different? Would I never be able to go back to the way I was?  
  
The matter was deep and complex, I couldn't go into it much farther than meeting the wave of questions that sprang up.  
  
While I gazed down at the fine filmy material of one of the dresses, I decided to approach it from a different angle. Supposing they were really just clothes, what was the big deal? They weren't ugly clothes, they were actually quite pretty.  
  
Just not on me.  
  
It was almost surprising. A major turning point in the situation for me. I realized that half of my trouble with the stuff was that I found that it was not meant for me. Really, it belonged on a model! Not a drab, plain, silly, obedient girl like me... I felt...unworthy of it.  
  
But there was no reason for me to feel unworthy of anything! I was fine just the way I was, if I wanted to wear some clothes, I wanted to wear some clothes, dammit.  
  
Ten minutes later I was standing in front of the mirror in the stuffy summer darkness in a peony-cream, beautiful dress. It shimmered and caressed my skin all the way down my body. Lovely. I sighed and hurried out of it, folding it down and pressing it carefully to the bottom of the bag.  
  
Next I eased into another dress, than another, and finally the pants and jacket outfit.  
  
Change was good. Change was healthy. Change was just what I needed. And there was nothing wrong with me. I was a good person. I wasn't unworthy, that was stupid. I hadn't done anything that should make me feel unworthy. I hadn't done anything wrong.  
  
Right?  
  
***  
  
The day of the audition swiftly approached and I spent the many hours in between quoting movie lines in front of my mirror like a nitwit. I had no experience, and the possibility that I would get in the group seemed very slim. Inuyasha searched for support and eventually came up with, "Well, you are very dramatic. That's good, right?"  
  
Riba drilled me at work, and although it was supposed to be a secret, all the other ladies eventually found out about it and we performed horrific "skits" in the coffee room on breaks. I felt like a total idiot, and every time I stuttered or blushed and turned away (as I did frequently), I could practically feel my desire to become an actress slipping away.  
  
When asked about my chances of success the women would politely change the subject. When Sango and Miroku found out about it they cheered me with obviously fake enthusiasm. As I sniffed at what poor actors they were the bitter phrase "it takes one to know one" rang about in my head.  
  
Rin and Shippou of course beamed with enthusiasm every time I walked in the room. But those two could get excited about the shapes of clouds for heaven's sake. They hardly counted. But I figured at that point that I had to take all the support I could get, so I puffed up reluctantly whenever they announced that I would be the next Audrey Hepburn.  
  
In other news, the clothes remained in the bag, which was tucked away discretely in my closet until the moment came to decide what I would wear to the audition.  
  
Other than that, things were more or less a combination of up and down moments. Which was the way they usually were. Which was boring.  
  
However, something mildly interesting did start happening over the next few days; though it was hardly unexpected. As in accordance with tradition, when Shippou started hanging around Rin more and more often, so did her older brother. Her eldest brother.  
  
Sesshomaru's watchful eye was never far behind the young couple, and since Inuyasha and I enjoyed going places with them so much, well, I started to see a lot more of him. Every time I was in his company I felt strangely uncomfortable. You tend to get the feeling that he's not only watching his little sister when he's around, he's also watching you too. It's not a particularly intimidating gaze, or a judgmental gaze... Not if you avoid looking him directly in the eye...  
  
Which is what I happened to do one day while Rin, Inuyasha, Shippou and I were all having lunch together.  
  
Rin brought up again that I was going to be a wildly successful actor someday. "She has talent, I know it. Don't think I haven't noticed your talent Kagome!" She shook a finger at me as if she were a mother scolding a bad child. "Don't you think so Sesshomaru?"  
  
The previously silent observer of our conversation had now been dragged into it. I blushed, for no reason at all. The table went quiet as everyone leaned forward a bit for an answer. Timidly, I raised my gaze to his, and froze like a deer in the headlights. To be honest, I hadn't actually expected him to be looking at me when I looked at him, but he was.  
  
My heart beat accelerated, I held my breath.  
  
There was something about the way his eyes rested on me so calmly, as I had never seen them before. Maybe it was just that I didn't really look at his eyes directly very often, but it seemed that...there was something lifted from them. They were calm and steady, beautiful. Not cold or reprimanding. Just perfect.  
  
"Everyone has talent."  
  
The statement stung; my emotions got the better of me in the frozen moment, and I turned away pretending that something outside had caught my attention. It felt like for just a second or two after I had looked away that his stare had still been fixed on me, but I had probably imagined it.  
  
Rin shrugged. "Yes, but Kagome has really special talent."  
  
Shippou put something in before Sesshomaru had a chance to counter Rin. If he had even wanted to.  
  
***  
  
My foot bobbed up and down where I sat rigidly on the bed. Up and down, tapping with a persistent beat. I looked over at my bedside clock. 4:00 a.m. After checking for details I had forgotten to ask about the first time, I had discovered that the auditions went on anytime between eight and three in the afternoon.  
  
  
  
The noises of New York were dim. The lights were still down in the city. In an hour or two, the sun would rise on a city that was already awake. In fact, there were probably people already at work. I flopped backwards onto the mattress of my bed.  
  
My restless body had been tossing around in the sheets for nearly forty-five minutes now. At this rate, when I turned up for my audition I would be nodding off before I had a chance to say my lines. I had to get some sleep.  
  
There was already a sleep aid floating around in me somewhere, it would kick in eventually, but eventually wasn't coming soon enough. I switched on the T.V. and watched the fan spin. As a little girl the sound of people moving around and talking outside my room had made me feel safe and sleepy.  
  
Someone was blaring back a story that had been playing on the news for days and days. I didn't listen, didn't know what it was...didn't care. In New York you could see the news live everyday. The stories that ended up on T.V. started in the streets. I wasn't interested in it anymore. The first months after boarding school had made it seem exciting and exotically dangerous, but not anymore.  
  
The sounds of gun shots from live coverage of some story leaked into my ears and I screwed my eyes shut against the ringing sounds.  
  
To my surprise, the darkness that now swarmed across my vision was oddly soothing. It was peaceful... I must have been more tired than I realized, because in moments I was dropping off, with the gun shots still blaring in my head.  
  
I dreamed about running alone down a dark alley by myself. It was strange, I could see the shadowy buildings all around me, but there were no lights on. Even the street lamps were extinguished. In the distance, over my own ragged breathing, I could hear the distant sounds of the city; of people and cars and buses and trains moving and thriving in the night. But they were so far away, I couldn't reach them.  
  
Then the buildings seemed to fall on top of me, and I fell. It was a wretched feeling of despair and loneliness, and shame. Like I had humiliated myself or let someone down. I was sure that I was going to die of crushing unhappiness, and with the city noises still hovering around me.  
  
But all of a sudden, I felt something warm wrap itself all around me, and I sighed, realizing that up until that point I had been bitterly cold. I saw golden eyes dancing in front of me, and sighed in rapture. The city was all around again, and I was happy.  
  
***  
  
My eyes cracked open to the sound of cars zipping back and forth under my window, and country bird calls replaced by a chorus of horns. Sunlight was pouring through the blinds. I stretched my arms and legs dreamily and blinked in the potent light.  
  
I bumped into something. Only mildly surprised, I rolled over and saw a pair of yellow eyes blinking away sleep in front of me. Inuyasha yawned and smiled.  
  
"Hi," I said sleepily. "What're you doing here?"  
  
He yawned again and rubbed his left eye slowly. "I heard you crying in your sleep."  
  
"Crying? Not again." Cry, cry, cry, cry, cry, cry. Cry. I was kind of a repetitive person.  
  
"Yeah, don't feel bad about it." He scratched his head and turned onto his side.  
  
I was about to return to sleep myself when I sat bolt upright. "TIME!" I screeched.  
  
Inuyasha cried out in surprise and slipped off the bed. There was a loud thump as he hit the wood floor. I scuttled over to the ledge and peered down at him. He was rubbing his head sourly. "What the hell was that for?!"  
  
"TIME!" I screamed again.  
  
"Crazy bitch!" He growled.  
  
I looked around wildly and then made a fantastic lunge for the night stand. I missed it completely and landed on Inuyasha, who was spitting and screaming obscenities as I was rolling off of him.  
  
"Time, time, time!" My alarm clock was turned away slightly, and I grabbed at it furiously. 2:30. "WHAT THE HELL?!"  
  
"WHAT?!" He shouted.  
  
"I'm going to be late!" In my mad scramble to get up I landed my foot squarely on Inuyasha's gut and slammed into the closet. Throwing it open, I began ripping through my clothing. "What am I going to wear?!"  
  
Still moaning and groaning in a pathetic heap on the floor, and clutching his stomach as well, Inuyasha was of no help whatsoever. Baby. I tore at my hair and practically screamed. After sifting through my blouses again I spun around and kicked him violently in the ribs. "GET UP AND HELP ME!" I was violent in the morning...afternoon...whenever I woke up.  
  
"SHUT UP!" He resumed moaning.  
  
"LISTEN BASTARD! I HAVE A HALF HOUR TO GET TO MY AUDITION!" I knelt down so that my face was level with his. "DO. NOT. RUIN. THIS. FOR. ME."  
  
Inuyasha squirmed a bit more and then pointed into the closet at the BCBG bag. "Jacket," he wheezed, "clam diggers, white top. Find some white high heels." And then he continued to writhe.  
  
I sat frozen for a moment. The outfit that was supposedly too good for me. My gaze strayed to the bag. "T-That outfit?"  
  
"Yes!" More huffing and puffing. "What are you waiting for?!"  
  
I swallowed once, and then without a second thought, I raced forward on my hands and knees and grabbed the bag and a pair of shoes. Then I tore into the bathroom. 24 minutes left.  
  
***  
  
I probably forgot somebody in the reviews. If that is true, SORRY! You can hate me all you want if I did. Recommendations next time. Too lazy. Zzzzzzz... 


	7. Eggplant

Okay, no time. Hey, hi, hello. Sorry about not updating quick enough. Get over it.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not Inuyasha or Electra or Antigone.  
  
***  
  
Chapter 7-Eggplant  
  
***  
  
I worried the hem of my jacket by twisting it up in my fingers, I was so anxious I could hardly think straight. The cab driver tapped his fingers rhythmically to the music pounding from the radio, and it made my thoughts chaotic. Eventually I leaned over to him from the backseat.  
  
"Excuse me," I said politely.  
  
He was a nice elderly man, the type of kindly grandpa folk that you just adore. Well, not that morning. The driver smiled at me over his shoulder to hint that he was paying attention.  
  
The corners of my mouth twisted up vaguely as I glanced at the heavy traffic we were stuck in. "Could you stop that please?"  
  
"Pardon?"  
  
I indicated his drumming fingers, "The tapping?"  
  
He looked slightly confused for a moment and then shifted his weight. "Oh, sorry, I didn't know it was bothering you."  
  
I sniffed. Shortly after that he began humming to the music and I just slumped back in my seat with my arms folded in frustration after giving a dramatic sigh. My eyes wandered out the window to the congestion of crowded vehicles. Why oh why did there have to be a Celtic Festival on Saturday...   
  
Leaning forward again, I interrupted the man once more, "Excuse me?"  
  
He was still grinning innocently when he turned back, eager to please no matter his passenger's mood; charming. "Yes?"  
  
"Could you please tell me the time?"  
  
He nodded, "Certainly," and moved to the left to get a view of the small digital clock near the steering wheel. "Well, it looks to be about..."  
  
About? About what? About too late?  
  
"2:52."  
  
About too late.  
  
"Oh shit," was my appropriate response. I snatched my purse from beside me, withdrew my wallet, and grabbed a fistful of cash that included at least thirty dollars, "Here," I shoved it all in the driver's face, "keep the change, don't spend it all in one place." And then before either of us could say another word, I was out the door.  
  
I scooted in between the cars in a mad dash for the sidewalk. Ignoring the honking horns, I mindlessly muttered, "excuse me" as I brushed past. When I finally hit the walkway I made a hairpin turn, skidding on my heels, and then began to run.  
  
My heart thudded in my ears, I wouldn't be tearing down the streets of New York in white high heels for anything else, though I couldn't put my finger on why the audition was so particularly special.  
  
Suddenly my ankle crumpled and I was set flying towards the ground with a strangled, unfeminine cry of distress. I hit the pavement in a crash and ended up tumbling a bit to my right until my skull was inches from ramming into the side of a building. The sky swirled above me as I tried to catch my breath. For a long moment I wondered what I was doing, and saw that the people above me walking past were giving me very strange looks.  
  
Slowly I dragged myself up, groaning and moaning in agony, and inspected myself. Except for being a bit dirtier, with a scraped knee, I noticed nothing serious. It wasn't the wisest move, but I certainly couldn't keep them on any longer, so I carefully unfastened my shoes and buckled them into my belt. Then I began the painful process of lifting myself up.  
  
Although I was aching, all went well, until I applied pressure to the foot that had given way. With a yelp of pain, I gingerly shook it about as I danced on my uninjured foot limply. Biting in my lip I looked down and saw that it was swelling considerably, going from red to something worse.  
  
"Oh hell," I whispered. But there was nothing for it, I knew I was losing precious time, so I bit the bullet and broke into a run again with my shoes flopping uselessly at my hip. My only consolation was that the traffic beside me, which was stretching in miles now, was still unyielding.  
  
It was stupid, and hurt like hell, but I ran, and I ran, and eventually the terrible burning hurt in my foot subsided a bit to a thundering numbness. By the time I hit the street that the theater was on I was fairly certain that my bad foot was pulsating with its own heartbeat.  
  
Thankfully, the Amour wasn't even half a block from the turn I had just made to get onto the street, so I was able to drag myself to it without collapsing.  
  
After shoving the doors open with a pronounced victory laugh, I hobbled into the lobby realizing at the same moment that I had no idea where to go from there. A girl was leaning against a wall to the right next to a small door, so I grinned, slipped my shoes back on (at which point I realized that my foot was still attached to my body because once again it was worse than squeezing lemon juice over an open paper cut) and made my way towards her.  
  
She was dressed casually in overalls and a white tank top. Even though her back was to me and I could tell that she seemed totally absorbed in a book she was holding; I could see that she had an olive complexion, and I could see that she wore her short brown hair in pig tails. Strangely familiar.  
  
"Excuse me," I asked, gripping her shoulder lightly, "Can you please tell me where the auditions are today?"  
  
She didn't respond quickly, but after about fifteen seconds she mumbled, "hold on..." and then fifteen more seconds later she turned a page and closed the book. Then she turned around with a sudden wind of perkiness. "How may I-"  
  
Her words were cut short when the girl's eyes rested on me.  
  
I reeled, small world... My voice came out dazed when I tentatively asked, "Yukari?"  
  
Yukari grinned wonderfully and put her hands on her hips "The one and only. Is that really you Kagome? You look great, how are you?"  
  
I smiled sheepishly, knowing that she was speaking about my outfit. "I'm okay, just ran halfway here and made an ass of myself in the middle of the street... How are you?"  
  
She nodded, probably not quite comprehending my bit about the slip, "Fine...Fine. I um, I work here, at the...theater." She indicated the theater in question with a thumb over her shoulder.   
  
"Really? Well that explains a lot."  
  
"Yeah, an actor actually," she blushed with pride, "been one for nearly a year now."  
  
I flexed my purpling toes in inspection for broken bones. "Wow, that's impressive."  
  
"Yeah..." She scratched her head bashfully, "So ahh, you said you were here for...What were you here for again?"  
  
Reality hit me hard and my brain rammed into a state of panic simultaneously. "Auditions," I snapped.  
  
"Really?! That's excellent Kagome!" She slapped my shoulder affectionately. "Boy, it'd be great if you were acting here! We could have so much fun I-"  
  
"No, you don't understand," I interrupted harshly, "I need to get to them NOW, I'm LATE."  
  
Yukari blinked, "Well...okay then, right through this door," she thumbed towards the door she had been guarding when I walked in.  
  
"Great," I muttered, and I turned for it, she caught my arm as my hand was poised on the doorknob.  
  
"Wait, they're seeing someone right now."  
  
"What?"  
  
"They've got somebody auditioning, we can't walk in on it." I huffed in frustration and she hesitated, "But I'll go poke my head in and tell them we've got one more, okay?"  
  
"Thank you," I slumped against the wall while Yukari opened the door a crack. A young woman's voice performing lines wafted to my ear. She had an amazing voice, clear as a bell and supremely gorgeous. I was reminded of the voice actress in the Disney version of Sleeping Beauty. Another movie that Inuyasha and I worshiped in our spare time.  
  
"...You've earned my hatred, and that of our dear brother too, by rights," the feminine voice said. I had no idea what she was quoting, but it was excellent, delivered wonderfully, and it made me shrivel. "...I will suffer nothing worse than death in a good cause..."  
  
Then there was Yukari speaking, warning whoever was judging the young woman that I would be entering soon. She retreated from the door after she got an answer from someone and returned to me.  
  
"What was she reading from," I whispered.  
  
Yukari smiled, "Her? Antigone. Great, wasn't she?"  
  
"Yeah..." I sighed, "Superb."  
  
Yukari shifted around uneasily, "Oh but I'm sure she'll be no competition for you Kagome," and she elbowed me in the ribs playfully.  
  
I slithered out of her reach and changed the subject. "I thought you worked at the coffee place Yukari."  
  
"Part time," she explained, "Can't get everything from an acting job you know," and winked.  
  
"Oh." More lines came to me through the wall at a particularly dramatic scene. "...With life still strong in me, I'm going on my last journey..."  
  
Yukari asked me a question, but I gave a halfhearted response and she backed off, realizing my extreme discomfort.  
  
"...Unmarried, never having heard my wedding song, death takes me to the dark riverbanks to be his bride..."  
  
There was such a strong burst of applause from the next room that Yukari jumped a bit in surprise. After a bout of enthusiastic whistling and more applause there was a brief exchange of dialogue and then the door opened as a beautiful girl walked past us, leaving me with my mouth agape and Yukari smiling and waving ignorantly as she bid the girl farewell.  
  
"She's sweet, isn't she?" Yukari said dreamily as if she were talking about her own child, and then she clapped her hands and pinned her gaze on me. "Well, your turn!"  
  
I swallowed and shrank a few more inches, "Great."  
  
Her arm went around my shoulders briefly, shaking me with light-hearted affection. "You'll do great," she said, but the statement seemed far off, and I thought I heard it echo around inside my head before I was able to understand that she was wishing me luck. My toes went first, and I tumbled a bit in the one foot walk that was required to get to the door.  
  
"Am I going to feint?" I asked dimly.  
  
"No, no, no, of course not..." She was already opening the door with her other hand.  
  
The light from the next room was starting to shine onto us, my eye twitched when I realized my doom and the most I could managed to get out of my throat was, "Wait a minute."  
  
But it was too late, Yukari had managed to slide her hand from my shoulder to my back and with a gentle push she scooted me in. Having lost control of my body I obeyed mindlessly. My eyes were still alive though, and they were busy swerving around with the intensity of a cornered animal.  
  
There was a gentle click, the door closing behind me. I swallowed dryly and ended up making petit coughs, I was stalling; and making an ass of myself at the same time. I like to think of myself as a multitasker. Meanwhile four judges-three male, one female were watching me affectionately from behind a plain wooden desk that was chipping a bit. There were no windows, the room itself was very small. It was just me, the desk, the judges, and the carpet on the floor.  
  
Then came the straw that broke the camel's back; ironically, that was sort of a good thing. Hojo beamed at me enthusiastically, wearing the same dopey school boy grin I remembered from our last meeting. All my systems crashed when I saw his face, my mouth opened wordlessly for a second. Everything was torn down in an instant, I realized that there was absolutely nothing more that could make the situation more uncomfortable than it already was. Therefore, at the end of the line, confronted by all my obstacles at once, a small voice in my head announced the conclusion of everything. And the conclusion was: fuck it.  
  
And that's just what I did.  
  
My vocal chords kicked in suddenly. I even managed to wave like I was actually happy to be there. "Hi, I'm Kagome Higurashi."  
  
Hojo stared at me with utter, pleased fascination. He had been waiting for me to show up, no use denying it. That was awfully sweet of him, but stupidly predictable. It was like something out of the Baby-Sitters Club. If he would just change his name to Jake Lionheart, then I would have something to worry about.  
  
Meanwhile, a male judge was bringing a paper to his face that had been resting on top of a small stack since I had entered. "Yes," he answered, then he ran through a list of the information I had given the woman on the phone, who I suddenly realized had been Yukari. I nodded slowly to him, still wrapped up in my revelation. He continued, "Wonderful, let's get it over with then."  
  
Hojo was the youngest one there by looks; the rest of the group seemed to be anywhere from 23-32. The oldest one being the man who had just spoken to me.  
  
The female, second youngest, 23 at a guess, addressed me. "Have you had any experience before, Kagome?"  
  
I shrugged, "No, not really." The woman was real pretty, a classic beauty; black hair to her waist, shockingly pale, flawless skin, dark eyes, red lips, the works. She reminded me a little of my mother in terms of physical appearance, but my mother, though she tended to forget about me, was still happy-go-lucky. This woman was more or less cold as ice in my opinion. Like she really had something to bitch about but kept her mouth shut because she felt it was below her to actually speak to people.  
  
The last one not to have spoken brought me back to earth, "What made you consider acting Kagome? Or, acting at this theater, perhaps?"  
  
Any typical girl would have blushed. Yeah well, I didn't blush. I put every known shade of red to shame and flat out insulted Woody Allen for the award of most stuttering in a what should have been at most a three word sentence, that's what I did. What came out of my mouth was something to the effect of, "I, w-well, um, and, yes, I, a-ahhh..." Then repeated in that order several times.   
  
Finally, on the verge of using the word, "shucks" and after pointedly avoiding eye contact with Hojo, I managed to announce that Sango's sister Kirara had inspired me. She had been an actress for a good long time and was well on her way to making a good, really recognizable name for herself. And the statement wasn't entirely a lie, I had always admired Kirara's guts, and the profession was appealing...It just wasn't the main reason I all of a sudden wanted to start acting.  
  
The most agreeable judge, second oldest guy nodded pleasantly and said that was very nice. Somehow I felt like they were all looking down at me, except Hojo and especially the black-haired woman. One corner of my mouth turned up, "Thanks," I said coldly.  
  
There was an awkward silence for a moment that I knew they were expecting me to break. Their eyes were trained on me critically, but I was still angry with my treatment. So instead, I had the nerve to fold my arms and cock my head, "Well?" I asked, "Are we going to get this started or what?" The woman's eyes flashed darkly for a second while Hojo and the second oldest guy chuckled softly. The other one pulled out a packet from the stack of papers in front of him and suddenly tossed it in my direction.  
  
"You're up."  
  
I fumbled with the packet and then secured it in my arms frantically, "I'm what?" My sudden bitchy cool was gone, out the window like my stomach and my confidence.  
  
He nodded towards me, suddenly looking disturbingly amused. "Read to us."  
  
Read? Did I even know how to read? I became visibly confused and just stared at the booklet in shock. The moment of truth had come far too soon. "From this?" I pointed at the packet. He smiled.  
  
Hojo spoke apprehensively from the corner, "He means that you should read some lines from the script, Kagome."  
  
"Oh, so that's what this is. From what scene?"  
  
"It doesn't matter," the woman snapped suddenly, "Just open it up and read."  
  
My eyebrows went up immediately, "Yes ma'am."  
  
There was a gentle roll of laughter from the judges in which the woman did not participate. She simply continued to give me a half-bored, half-belittling stare. After puttering around a bit and sort of playing with the pages like I was actually doing something, I took a deep breath, opened the book, and looked down.  
  
I didn't even know what the thing was, I didn't even know the names of the judges! My eyes went down onto the page, I wasn't ready, shouldn't they have done something more than this? What were they thinking? Was this really what actors were? Free form and sketchy and unorganized? The lower lip of my mouth opened very gently, just as I as I was about to speak the woman interrupted me suddenly and I jumped a few inches up into the air.  
  
"Page number please."  
  
"P-Pardon me?" Somehow there had to be something I was missing. I was probably extremely lucky to have survived this far because obviously I was going through the process with absolutely none of the required knowledge.  
  
"Page number!" She looked like she wanted to break my skull over the desk. My eyes searched frantically all over the page, questing for the number. Number number number number.   
  
"Number 56."  
  
"Thank you," she hissed. They all reached over from the original stack of papers and passed individual packets around to each other. I was awkwardly confused, more so than I could remember being before in the past few months. Was this a joke?  
  
After some silent deliberation amongst the group, the oldest man spoke up and calmly asked Hojo to "take this one." Take this one? What one? Me? Take what now? In what manner would the taking be accomplished? The sudden realization of how much I didn't know up against the fact that I was actually doing an audition went straight to my head, and the adrenaline nearly made me swoon on the spot.  
  
I looked at Hojo pathetically only to find that he was looking back at me with utter faith and confidence. "Ready Kagome?" What should have sounded like, "I'm sorry, could you please explain to me what we're doing again," actually came out as a dazed nod that took two seconds to be registered by my brain.  
  
His bright eyes slipped down to the packet, "Alright Kagome, you've chosen to read from Electra," and he paused to say, "Very nice." I would have said, "Gee, thanks," had I not been too petrified to open my mouth. "I think that in this scene I'll play the leader, and you can read as Electra, alright?"  
  
"Um, a-alright."  
  
"Okay, I'll start." He straightened himself and cleared his throat before beginning with a clear, ringing voice that I had never heard or imagined him using, "Tell me, is Aegisthos near? Or has he left the house?"  
  
Looking down I realized in the moment of ultimate panic that I needed to talk. My mind chose this moment to go completely blank except for a single purpose that remained fixed and immovable. Read. Read your lines stupid...Don't think about reading, DO IT! The words were right in front of me, all I had to was say them and be done with it. Say them...Just. Say them. But other things were invading my brain too fast for me to keep track of things, and very soon my perfectly understood task was floating somewhere in space above my head, but not in it. For example, what the hell was an Aegisthos?  
  
Fortunately, my eyes swerved up and locked with someone's at just the right time. No, not Hojo's, I wasn't the dippy moron who drew strength from a boy's eyes, I was the dippy moron that understood the meaning of the words: I'll prove you wrong. The deep brown orbs became narrowed and fierce as the unknown woman regarded me with absolute disapproval. The look she was giving me made me quiver with rage. How dare she...She didn't think I could do it, did she? She didn't think I was "good enough?" Yeah well...You've got another thing coming bitch, so just shut the fuck up and watch.  
  
"He has left, of course. How should I be out, if he were near?" Oh yeah...How do you like that?  
  
"If he is away, then, I may speak further with you?"  
  
Hojo was pretty good, I couldn't help but be impressed for a moment. But with my intent I was on the warpath to not only show him up but wave it in Bitchy McBitcherson's ridiculously perfect face. And that's what I did.  
  
"Yes, you may speak."  
  
"Let me enquire about your brother...Is he coming? Delaying? I must know."  
  
"He says he is coming but...does not come."  
  
"A man with a great works likes to delay."  
  
"When I saved him, I did not delay."  
  
"Take courage. He is the man to help those he loves."  
  
"I trust him...or I should not still be alive."  
  
I could feel it, I could feel the splendid deliverance. The timing was right, my voice was right, everything was in sync with everything else.  
  
...TAKE THAT!  
  
Coincidentally, at the moment that my supreme victory was dawning on me, the eldest judge lifted a hand and said, "Thank you, that's enough."  
  
I wriggled in my shoes with glee, this was very good, I could feel it. And I could see it on the woman's face because she looked mighty pissed and nothing else at that moment could have made me feel so satisfied.  
  
Hojo was the first one to speak, "That was very good Kagome." There was something beyond tender feelings mixed into that statement, and I think that it was real admiration.  
  
"I agree," the second oldest male seemed a little dazed, "That was...excellent."  
  
The woman looked too murderous to speak, and so she just sat there with her jaw set and her arms folded. I grinned and concealed my urge to gloat as neatly as I could. "Thank you very much."  
  
"Well now that we have gotten that part out of the way, I think we owe you an introduction," the oldest judge said.  
  
I blinked, "What?"  
  
"Well we don't usually do it this way, but we were so tired after all the auditions and you were late, so we decided we would let your read first and then if we didn't like you we just wouldn't give you the time of day and simply send you packing so we could get out of here," the second oldest said pleasantly for such an unfeeling speech.  
  
Blinked again, nothing else to do.  
  
"And well, you were very good Kagome," Hojo commented kindly.  
  
"Ahh...Thanks." These people were insane.  
  
"Now then, that's Hojo, you've met I think; I'm Myouga Kanzaki," the second oldest judge pointed to himself, "That's Adrian Grey," he pointed to the eldest judge, "and that, is Kikyo Nomiyaki."  
  
Kikyo? Stupid pretty name...I hated it. Mentally I ticked off yet another candidate for the title of my future first daughter.  
  
Mr. Grey spoke again with his deep, serious voice, "Kagome you have very impressive talent, I must admit that I am rather in awe."  
  
Oh wow, it was too perfect, Kikyo looked excellently ticked. I prayed silently for the compliments to keep coming.  
  
"Yes," Myouga said, "You were certainly very well prepared for this, you're quite a natural Miss Higurashi. We'll certainly be considering you as one of the best we've seen all day."  
  
Wait, what? Was that it? Was it over already?  
  
Hojo nodded, "You can count on that."  
  
"Thank you for your time Miss Higurashi, we'll be contacting you very shortly when we come to a decision," Mr. Grey told me formally.  
  
"Wait a minute," I interrupted, "That was it?"  
  
Hojo hesitated, "Yeah, we don't really need much to judge a possible actor."  
  
"But...but what about information? Don't I need to know anything about this theater...what I'd be doing, all that?"  
  
Mr. Grey stepped in, "You'll be getting all of that when we reach you with our choice, don't worry."  
  
"Assuming," Kikyo muttered coldly, "You get the chance to perform at this theater."  
  
I smiled sarcastically at her with my head tilted at a falsely cheery angle, "Well thanks."  
  
"No problem," she hissed.  
  
"Well thank you again for your time Miss Kagome," Mr. Kanzaki, Myouga, got up to shake my hand.  
  
"Yeah..." I started moving towards the door, still a little dazed, "H-Have a good...um...afternoon...."  
  
Hojo waved at me fondly as I slipped out, and I waved back with a sort of helpless smile on my face.  
  
Once out the door, Yukari immediately slapped me on the back, "Well what do ya know," she chirped brightly, "You survived, didn't you?"  
  
"I guess..." I whispered softly.  
  
Yukari peered at me deeply, "What's wrong?"  
  
"Oh nothing, I just expected...I don't know...a little more."  
  
She laughed shrilly, "What do you mean? What exactly were you expecting?"  
  
I shrugged absently, "I don't know, I thought they might give me a lecture or have me answer some questions or fill out a form or something."  
  
"Oh yeah, we're just not that formal here at Amour!" She laughed again. Yukari laughed a lot. I sort of chuckled dryly.  
  
All of a sudden, I toppled to the side and crashed into the wall clumsily. A stabbing pain screamed from my wounded ankle and I cried out a bit as I slowly slid down to the floor.  
  
"Whoa," Yukari knelt down beside me, "Better watch those high heels, you could-HOLY SHIT!"  
  
I blanched knowing that she had noticed my foot. It had to resemble an eggplant by now.  
  
"What the hell happened to your foot Kagome?!"  
  
Yeah, I knew it.  
  
"I um...tripped on the way over. It isn't that bad, is it?"  
  
The door opened beside us unexpectedly and Hojo's orange-red head poked out. "Are you okay out here Yukar-Hey! Kagome, your foot! Are you alright?"  
  
"It's okay," I tried to stand, "It's nothing, really, I just fell on the way here, I'll just take a taxi and administer some first aid when I get home, it's no big deal."  
  
Unfortunately I found standing to be a rather difficult feat, and soon tumbled again only to have Yukari swing her arm around my shoulders for support just in time. "You can't even walk!"  
  
"Don't trouble yourself, I'll be fine, honestly."  
  
Myouga soon appeared beside Hojo, "What's the trouble?"  
  
"Kagome sprained her ankle."  
  
"I did not! Honestly, it's not that bad!"  
  
"It looks like an eggplant."  
  
"It does NOT! Well...maybe a plum. But not an eggplant..."  
  
"Face it Kagome," she hoisted me up so that I was standing on one leg, "Your foot looks like an eggplant, and we can't let that go."  
  
"Right," Hojo suddenly put an arm around my shoulders as well, and I couldn't help the blush that arose on my cheeks, "We'll help you get to a med center, I don't think there's one very far from here..."  
  
"Please," I begged, "Don't go to all this trouble for me! I'm telling you, it's not as bad as you think! I hardly feel it."  
  
"So those are tears of what, joy?" Yukari gave me a skeptical look.  
  
"I'm not crying," I countered.  
  
"You look like you're about to."  
  
"Besides," Hojo said next to my ear, "It's no trouble at all."  
  
"And we can't have a very likely future actress walk off with an injury like that," Myouga winked at me.  
  
I realized that I couldn't win the fight, and found myself smiling weakly at all of them, "Thank you so much, this is really very considerate you."  
  
"You're welcome," Yukari replied.  
  
"Now then," Hojo turned to Mr. Kanzaki, "Will you please tell them that I'll be back in a little while? Just let me take care of Miss Higurashi and I'll be back in no time."  
  
Myouga nodded, "But don't bother if you get held up past six, we'll all be gone by then."  
  
"Right, thanks Myouga."  
  
"Yeah, hold the fort while we're away," Yukari laughed again.  
  
"This is really great of you guys," I muttered quietly.  
  
"Don't mention it, let's get moving."  
  
Carefully we tried leaning forward, and immediately I fumbled and almost dragged the three of us down to the ground. We all giggled a little and tried again on the count of three. That time I fell into Hojo and we both tumbled into the wall. After apologizing with embarrassment, Yukari stooped and carefully removed my towering shoes.  
  
"There, is that better?" She asked.  
  
"A little..."  
  
Hojo's unfaltering enthusiasm for everything showed through again, "Terrific, let's give it another go."  
  
The "go" managed to land Yukari on her knees, and we came to acknowledge the fact that we had a problem.  
  
"Okay...there has to be another solution to this," she mumbled as she swept the dust off of her overalls.  
  
After a pause, Hojo spoke up, "I think I've got an idea. Kagome, pardon me."  
  
"What? I-Oh, hey there!"  
  
Before I'd had time to question him, Hojo had swept me off my feet into a bridal style hold; with a hand under my knees and another supporting my back. "I'd feel better about your safety if you held onto my neck," he said softly, "That is, if you don't mind."  
  
"No of course not, I only hope that I'm not breaking your back or anything," I sputtered.  
  
Yukari snickered, "You guys make quite the couple. I can see I'm not needed here."  
  
Panic seeped into my veins instantly, if Yukari left, I somehow knew that I would find a way to embarrass myself. I was already blushing madly.  
  
"But I think I'll come along anyway, just incase superman runs out of ammo."  
  
My relief came out in a sigh. And I think Hojo noticed it because he seemed to glow a little and immediately waves of guilt started to pour over me.  
  
"Come on," he said in a voice seemingly higher than usual, "Let's get this show on the road ladies, before Kagome feints from the pain."  
  
"I WILL NOT! WHAT PART OF 'NOT SO BAD' DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?!"  
  
***  
  
The medical center was strangely clean for anything of the title in New York. If you weren't going to your own doctor for treatment you usual wound up in a decaying hellhole. But this place...It was fascinatingly spotless. There were of course an assortment of interesting characters in the lobby, no use trying to avoid that, but other than that, it was very orderly. The rooms were even more impressive because the magazines were from the present year. It may have been the pain killers they had fed me that had made my observations so bright and sunny.  
  
I bounced on the paper-covered couch they had set me up on. "Did you notice how clean this place is?"  
  
Yukari looked up from her magazine, which she was reading propped up in the corner. "Huh?"  
  
"Look, no cracks in the walls or discolored ceiling tiles or...anything!"  
  
She giggled and resumed reading, "Don't trouble your ankle Kagome."  
  
"Ankle," I laughed, "What ankle? I can't even feel it anymore!"  
  
"Good."  
  
"She's right," Hojo said, "It is pretty clean in here for New York."  
  
"You see what I mean?" I pointed to him, "Hojo believes me."  
  
"I never said I didn't believe you, Kagome," Yukari started to snicker.  
  
A lengthy silence settled over us, and after a short time I started to hum absent-mindedly. My eyes brushed over the room childishly. I was tempted to swing my legs. My state of mind was totally out of order, and I had no qualms with it.  
  
Suddenly, I cried out.  
  
"Kagome?" Hojo asked nervously, "Are you alright?" Yukari looked up from her magazine again.  
  
"I have to call Inuyasha," I told him blankly.  
  
"Inuyasha?" He didn't remember him from a week ago when he had come with me with Rin and Shippou.  
  
"Her best friend," Yukari put in, "Right?"  
  
I nodded, "He'll get really pissed if he doesn't find out where I am soon." I felt around uselessly in all of my pockets, to no avail. I didn't have my cell phone with me, "Do either of you happen to have a phone? I left mine at my apartment."  
  
Yukari searched all of her pockets, and Hojo searched his. In a few seconds she shrugged in dismay. "Sorry."  
  
"It's okay, thanks."  
  
"Maybe they'll let us use their phone here, I don't see why they wouldn't."  
  
"Wait a minute," We both turned to Hojo, who was removing his small portable phone from the front pocket on his shirt. "Here, hold on...let me...turn it on."  
  
He pressed a lot of buttons...too many buttons too just turn it on. It was a suspicious action that I didn't think much of; on the other hand, maybe it was just a very complicated cell phone. After a bit more button punching, he handed me his phone with a scarlet face. I almost asked him if he was alright, but I knew better than to embarrass him so.  
  
Looking down, I saw that his little screen read, "I LUV MOM." There were several extra spaces between the words "LUV" and "MOM." I ignored them, but my heart beat sped up a little when the possibilities arose in the uncontrollable part of my head.  
  
"That's so sweet Hojo..." I told him lovingly.  
  
"What?" Yukari asked us.  
  
"He has 'I love mom' written on the top of his screen."  
  
"Awww, Hojo you prince..."  
  
Hojo blushed even more, "Um...you have to push the green button to start dialing, then push 'send.'"  
  
I nodded and followed his instructions to the best of my abilities with my drug-clouded brain. Soon it began to ring on the other line, and I waited patiently for Inuyasha to answer the phone, praying silently that he hadn't gone out...because I couldn't remember Sango's number. Or Miroku's for that matter.  
  
To my relief, the phone was answered after only three rings. "What."  
  
"You're awfully polite," I quipped sarcastically, "You know you really should brush up on your people skills."  
  
"What the hell do you want? Or did you just call to lecture me?"  
  
"Hey! What did I do?"  
  
"You kicked me in the stomach," He told me bitterly.  
  
"Oh yeah...Whoops."  
  
"Yeah. Whoops is right. What do you want," It came out sounding more like a statement than a question.  
  
I started to twiddle my thumbs and looked down at my lap glumly, "I um...kind of sprained my ankle, or ahhh, twisted it, or something, we don't exactly know yet."  
  
"You what?! How the hell did you do that?! Hey, where are you calling from anyway?!"  
  
I laughed a little empty laugh, and smiled for the peculiar situation. "Well, it's a long story...I took a cab first, but then we got caught in traffic because of a festival downtown...So I jumped out and tried running to the theater."  
  
"Wait. Stop. Let me guess, you were still wearing your heels, weren't you?"  
  
"Yeah..."  
  
"You moron."  
  
"Shut up. Anyway, I fell over."  
  
"Where are you?" He pressed.  
  
"I'm at a med center not very far from the theater," Yukari shouted the address for me, "Did you hear that?"  
  
"Yes, who was that?" He asked.  
  
"My friend Yukari."  
  
  
  
"Coffee house girl?"  
  
"Yeah, small world...she works at the theater as an actress."  
  
"Wait," He interrupted, "So you actually GOT to the theater?"  
  
I nodded even though he couldn't see me, "That's right, I ran on my bad ankle anyway, and I even did my audition."  
  
  
  
"Idiot! ....How was it?"  
  
"Good, I'll give you the details later, I don't want to waste minutes on Hojo's phone," Hojo waved his hands in distress, indicating that I was free to use his phone for as long as I wanted. I beamed at him.  
  
"Hojo?!" Inuyasha screeched desperately, "Wait, Kagome, Hojo? He's there?"  
  
"Come pick me up in a taxi okay?"  
  
"Kagome! Answer me dammit! Hojo is there?!"  
  
I smiled fiendishly, "See you soon Inuyasha."  
  
"WAIT!"  
  
"Bye." I flipped the phone shut, which disconnected me sufficiently, and handed it back to Hojo, "Thank you so much."  
  
Hojo blushed a little bit, "You're welcome, but really, you could have used it as much as you liked." The blush deepened considerably, "I-I'm sure Inuyasha would have been happy to hear about what a great job you did, Kagome."  
  
"You're sweet."  
  
He smiled.  
  
"I'd tell you guys to get a room," Yukari said dryly, "But it seems you already have one, I was just unfortunate enough to be landed in it with you."  
  
I threw the limp headrest-pillow on my couch at her, she giggled insanely. Hojo was too red to speak, apparently.  
  
A nurse came in at that moment wielding a small basket that had a needle in it, among other things, and I stiffened instantly. The doctor came in after him, smiling kindly.  
  
"Well then, I hear you landed badly on your ankle," He said in a pleasant voice.  
  
I nodded, "You could say that."  
  
"My..." He looked down at my foot, "It looks just like an eggplant, doesn't it?"  
  
***  
  
At this moment, I have NO TIME to do review responses, reccomendations, etc. Sorry! Thanks for reading! 


	8. Bugged

Hola muchachas. Summer is here thank GOD. Alas, I have only two months to bust my tail trying to finish maybe at least ONE story. Because, well...

Guess who's going to boarding school?

.........................

Disclaimer: I DON'T. OWN IT. Okay? Yes? We good?

.................

Chapter 8-Bugged

..................

Inuyasha barged in shortly after they set my cast. Apparently my ankle was sprained, and limping around for so long had only made it worse in a very short period of time. They had to brace it up, and instructed me casually after the treatment had been administered that I should avoid moving around too much.

The doors burst open just as they were assigning me some crutches and Inuyasha came in with a cloud of fussy satellite nurses wavering around him. They cried in delicate anxiety every time he flipped his head around wildly, searching for me in the small space contained in the room we had originally been waiting in.

"Kagome?!" he snapped, "KAGOME!"

I raised my hand awkwardly as everyone stared at him wide-eyed, "Present."

He fixed his vicious yellow stare on me instantly, and then he saw my foot. "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!" He shouted.

I sniffed, "You're so damn violent. Control yourself."

"Like hell!" He snapped, "What the hell happened to your fucking foot?!"

"It's just a foot," I told him icily, "You don't need to attach the extra adjective."

"Don't give me that shit!" Inuyasha strode over to me as the doctor quietly shooed the panicked nurses away. As he bent down to inspect the cast, I sort of flinched.

"Don't touch it," I whimpered, "I know for you the urge must be strong, but please refrain while it's in a cast. It still hurts a bit, you see."

"What. Happened."

"I told you already, I–"

"She slipped on the way to the theater. Right?" Yukari smiled at me, and at Inuyasha, affectionately.

"Right."

"Thanks," he muttered coldly. Yukari beamed.

At this point in time Hojo chose to speak, which thoroughly annoyed Inuyasha in a very visible way; I couldn't quite imagine why at that very moment. "I, um–" Hojo got up tentatively and reached out towards Inuyasha, who took his hand with obvious reluctance, not to mention distaste, and shook it numbly, "I'm Hojo."

"I noticed."

Meanwhile, I was shriveling where I sat. The doctor seemed totally oblivious to everything and just continued scribbling over his clipboard for medication I would need to pick up. He didn't appear to mind that there were five people crowded into the already cramped space in the little room, including himself. He also didn't appear to mind that a very volatile homosexual was moments away from punching out the shrimpy guy with the red hair for absolutely no reason. I was beginning to regret calling Inuyasha...It really wasn't necessary, I was sure that Yukari and Hojo would have been delighted to help me home.

Quickly, I interrupted the scathing glare-fest that Hojo was losing. "Ahhh, Inuyasha, these are my um, friends, from the...theater. That's Yukari," she waved happily, "And this is Hojo, as you know."

" Yes." His eyes never once left Hojo, even when I pried him away with a gentle hug and brought him down to ear level.

"We will discuss your behavior later," I hissed in a low voice so that the others wouldn't hear me.

"Well," the doctor, who I had learned was named Tom Fitzpatrick, turned to us on a stool with wheels affixed and handed Inuyasha a paper, "I assume you're going to get this little lady home?"

Inuyasha nodded.

"Alright, I'm prescribing a few things to soothe the pain, you may want to pick them up as you go." He nodded again, and Doctor Fitzpatrick went on to describe the do's and don't's of wearing a cast. I would be able to return to the same med center to have it removed in a mere three weeks. But he told me that I wouldn't be allowed to go to work for the next fifteen days, or walk around much at all, despite how light the damage really was. "The injury isn't as bad as you might think," he told me, "Which must be why you didn't seem to be too bothered with it for such a long time."

"I think her nervousness outweighed her pain," Yukari commented.

The doctor laughed a little, Yukari and Hojo had only been too happy to explain the events leading up to the trip to the med center in great detail while they were setting the cast.

"I suppose if you don't have any questions or concerns, you're free to go." I shook my head. "No? Well good luck Miss Higurashi, don't forget to check out at the desk, I'm sure you'll be able to get a hang of the crutches with no trouble at all. And the burning agony you're going to start to feel after the pain killers we just fed you start to wear off is perfectly normal, no doubt one or two capsules of what I've prescribed will take care of it in no time." He then winked casually.

"Thank you," I replied with a tint of fear.

He smiled, "Not at all, I hope all goes well with your acting career."

............

Hojo seemed a little reluctant to let us go. He sort of hung around, even after Yukari left to go feed her cat, Max. He just kind of fluttered around us as we were signing some forms and what not, and then he accompanied us out and helped me limp around gingerly, as I was a more than a little inept with the crutches.

Hojo was in fact trying to get me to practice with them near a bench on the sidewalk as Inuyasha was trying to find a cab in the somewhat quiet part of town. I sat on the bench crossly, arms folded and looking perfectly indignant when he suggested I try again.

"Come on now," he begged, "I'm sure you'll be able to get a hang of it."

"No way," I snapped playfully, "I'll fall. It's still really sore you know." He snickered at me and tucked one under each arm. "What are you doing?" He started to hop around and do pirouettes on the sidewalk.

"Trying to show you how easy it is," he smiled warmly at me and began making great bounds like a man on stilts.

"Stop it," I started to giggle just watching him, "You'll wear them out!" He continued to prance around, and began circling my bench. "You lunatic."

"I'll tell you what," he told me, twirling. "I'll give these back to you if you promise to use them in front of me."

"I didn't say give them back, I said stop wearing them out!" My hand shot out as he swooped past. Hojo laughed heartily.

"Oh so you _do _want them back?"

"No!" He made noises behind me that sounded like he was deliberately dragging the ends against the concrete. I whipped around, "Hojo!"

He was actually just dragging the heels of his shoes around. "Made you look."

I sniffed, but couldn't help chuckling. He was pretty damn cute when he wanted to be.

"Come on Kagome," all of a sudden he was right in front of my face, big silly eyes gleaming woefully, "Please try them?"

I struggled, remembering my hurt foot and the multiple times he had already made me attempt to coordinate my actions with the crutches. But his sappiness was in the end, irresistible. Holding out my hand stiffly, I muttered, "Give em' here."

He was all smiles when he placed them in my hands. I cradled them under my arms briefly before throwing my weight before me and trying to stand. Adding pressure to my wounded foot made me wince, but I endured it regardless. Hojo immediately placed a reassuring hand on my back to steady me as I rose.

"There," he coaxed, "You're doing great."

"I haven't even stood up yet."

"Hey, you want encouragement or not?"

I grinned sheepishly and tried to straighten myself, only to topple to the left a little. Hojo reached out and placed his arm over my shoulders pleasantly, though despite how comfortable he appeared, his face was burning sensationally. "O-Okay," He said shakily, "Let's try taking a step, shall we?"

I nodded, "Onward, ho."

The "step," of course, made me pivot and fall. But I didn't fall just anywhere, I went right into his chest and ended up slamming my face into his neck, just below his chin. Blinking stupidly for only a moment, I felt his heart rate speed up where my nose was pressed against skin. His hands were both on my shoulders, securing me against him.

I was the first to speak, "S-Sorry," I whispered faintly. I was more disturbed than I had supposed.

He swallowed, but did not let go at first. Eventually, however, he released me, and helped me to steady myself a little haphazardly. He had his head bowed a little so that his hair hung over his eyes, "Sure...it's okay," Hojo mumbled.

It wasn't long before he lifted his head and revealed his eyes to me. This time around though, they weren't misted or jovial, they were purely emotional. I hesitated, and almost drew back from him, but it wouldn't have felt right. After noticing that my mouth was slightly ajar, I shut it with a snap and began biting down on my lip fiercely. I would have chosen to break the ice again, but my voice was long gone. Yet still, echoing in the back of my mind, lurking in my heart, this mute feeling of regret was shivering inside of me, like a warning. Not a warning of past experience, not something that was trying to make me afraid of relationships. It was something else connected to, a person.

"Hey."

Inuyasha startled us both, and I was almost glad, if a little disappointed, to have an excuse to abandon the uncomfortable situation. He was standing some fifteen feet away, thumbing back behind him at the taxi that had just rolled up along the curb. "Ready to go kid?" He asked me. His tone was flat, not something I was used to. It bothered me. Had he seen us together?

"Yeah," I replied. Slowly, I turned around to look at Hojo. He was looking very embarrassed then. "I should go..." I said stupidly.

"I guess so." His voice suddenly went up enthusiastically, "Hey, work on those crutches, okay?" He slapped me on my shoulder.

"Of course."

"Great, we'll um, we'll call you about..." His hands moved while he spoke, "About the thing, the tryout, audition...thing."

"Oh yeah," Inuyasha came up beside me and leaned my way so that I could wrap my arm around his shoulders for support, "Thanks."

Hojo moved forward instantly when he saw Inuyasha trying to help me to the car, "I can help!"

Inuyasha stopped dead in his tracks and gave him the most icy stare I had seen coming from my friend in weeks, "It's okay," He said coldly.

Hojo halted as well, "Oh, alright. Um...have a good evening, be careful."

"Thank you for everything Hojo," I called quietly to him.

He waved, "Anytime Kagome."

Inuyasha then opened the cab door and shoved me in. Before I could say another word to Hojo he practically slammed the door shut and started barking directions to the driver. Once we had started to move, I turned on him.

"What the hell is a matter with you?" I asked furiously.

"Nothing."

Fuming, I closed my eyes tightly and then opened them again, "Nothing? Nothing?! What do you mean '_nothing_?' What happened back there?"

He gave me a very heated stare, "Nothing. Happened back there."

He didn't say another word, and neither did I. For about ten seconds. Then, "Are you still mad about this morning? Look, I'm sorry for kicking you and all that, I was just really nervou – "

"No!" He cut me off dejectedly. "NO! It, it was _NOT _about that." Inuyasha slumped over on his side and stared out the window, "I, it was not about that. It wasn't."

"What was it about then?" I pressed.

"Nothing."

"Quit saying that!"

"God dammit Kagome! It was about...about Hojo."

"What about Hojo?" I inched closer to him, though his eyes still remained fixed on the window.

He sighed gruffly, "Kagome, will you listen to me? I mean, _really_, listen to me?"

The sincerity in his voice was duly noted, and I carefully looped my arm around his and put my head on his shoulder. "Of course I will," I told him softly, "As your best friend, I'm entitled to listen to every word you say with love and respect, even if it ticks me off."

Inuyasha sort of half-smiled and patted my head, "You're a good kid." Then he sighed again very slowly. "Kagome, you know I just want you to be happy, right?"

"Right, of course. I want you to be happy too."

"Well now, of course you remember Kouga..."

I sniffed, "I try not to...wait," The pieces suddenly fell into place. "Inuyasha, you don't – Hojo's nothing like Kouga!"

He looked at me over his shoulder. Didn't say a word, just smiled at me.

"He isn't!" I insisted shrilly. My head left his shoulder in panic. "You don't really think that, do you Inuyasha?"

"I'm just worried." He ruffled my hair affectionately.

I gaped at him, "Oh Inuyasha, how did you come to such a conclusion?"

He shook his head, "It's not that I think Hojo reminds me of Kouga, it's that you're, well, you're obviously getting closer to him every time you guys meet. You practically started making out the first time you talked to each other."

"We did not!"

"Oh you did too. But let's not fight about it-"

"That was new, you just broke up one of our fights."

"Thank you. As I was saying, it's not Hojo, it's the possibility of something happening between you guys that makes me uneasy. Something serious."

"Why would that make you uneasy?" My chin found its way back to his shoulder without me realizing it.

"Because then you risk..."

"I risk...?"

"You risk getting hurt again."

I released him promptly. "Oh, o-oh, Inuyasha..."

"It's okay, I can understand if you get a little angry with me."

I shook my head, "It's not that!" I cried, "It's not that at all!" He turned around and stared at me woefully, "I – ," I threw my head down into his chest and gave him a massive hug, "Thank you so much Inuyasha."

He returned the hug warmly.

"Your welcome."

"But please, try and understand that I'm not going to let myself be screwed over again. I'm just not. It's not worth it to go through that shit another time."

"I know."

"I promise Inuyasha, I'm not going to let it happen, alright?"

"Alright Kagome."

I looked up at him, "Okay?"

Inuyasha started to laugh. "Okay."

"Good." Nuzzling into his shirt, I closed my eyes and kept him wrapped up in my arms. It felt oddly like being a little baby again. Inuyasha was almost like a brother to me. Or...a sister. Only he would let me hug him in such a fashion.

...........................

Breakfast At Tiffany's was showing for about the five millionth time. I didn't mind though, at least I wasn't at work. The _idea _of being a hard working member of society was appealing, but I detested little more than following that noble thought through. My vacation was profoundly enjoyable, especially after the pain started going away in my foot.

Inuyasha flopped around the house. When I was at work in the summer he was usually home sewing in his little private room devoted to the hobby. He loved to make clothes, all the time, it was his passion, and the reason he'd majored in fashion design in the first place.

My presence did not disrupt his habits in any way, so if I wanted him to turn the machine off for a while so I could take a nap, I'd have to fight for my right to sleep. The option of getting a hotel room for the remaining week and a half was sounding mighty tempting.

But my more or less immobility (I still refused to use the crutches, and thus hadn't set foot outside of the apartment for about ten days) plus the fact that the phone number I had given the theater pertained to the flat prevented me from taking the initiative. I learned to deal with Inuyasha hammering away on his sewing machine, and both Sango and Miroku were more than happy to keep me company; granted, they wanted to do so for slightly different reasons.

At that moment, watching Audrey Hepburn's painfully beautiful face be aired yet again on T.V., Sango herself was situated next to me on the bed, her fingers twisting around in her hair idly. I had no qualms with seeing the heroine of the film eat her breakfast in front of the extravagant and lovely jewelry store, but my companion was a bit bored. Hence her motivation for starting a conversation as we stared at the screen.

"Kagome, do you think I have a chance with Miroku?"

I snapped out of my reverie. Until that moment I had been completely entranced by a diamond the size of a small bird's egg. The question was so sudden, and so personal, that I was shocked into silence for a while. Sango seemed to have no trouble with voicing it, and didn't even avert her eyes from the television as she waited for my response, still fondling her long tresses distantly.

"What?"

"Oh, I know he loves to fool around...but do you think someday he might settle down?"

My eyebrows went down in confusion and surprise while she continued to look out in front of her dreamily. Feigning innocence, I smiled at her sweetly, "Why Sango, you should have told me you liked Miroku."

"Please," she huffed, "I know it's been obvious forever."

"Obvious to everyone but Miroku." Sango sighed deeply and bowed her head. Noting her blatant disappointment, I spoke again to lighten the mood. "What made you come out with it just now?"

She laughed gently and tangled some sheets up in her fingers, "It will sound silly."

"Try me," I suggested immediately.

Her eyelashes fluttered, and I could see her glowing just a little bit. Gradually she let her chin tilt upwards with a sort of pride evident. "Do you mind if I close the blinds?"

It was a strange request, but I gave her permission, of course. Sango leapt up off of the bed and scuttled to the window, where she closed the blinds securely until the room was swamped in shadows. Her movements were that of a happy housewife. As she made her way back to her original location she stopped and closed my door as I turned off the T.V. Finally settled again she looked at me in the dark and lowered her voice to a whisper.

"I've been seeing some telltale signs..."

I nodded, feeling not unlike a fourteen-year-old playing truth or dare.

"Well, he's been acting...nice, lately."

"How?"

She shrugged, "Oh, he's been helping out more, staying home more, cleaning, if you can believe it."

My eyebrows rose, "What else?"

"And, well, the other day, I saw him leafing through photo albums..." She twiddled her thumbs idly while she spoke. "My photo albums."

"Yours? Why would he do that?"

A long sigh escaped her lips while she gazed wistfully up at the ceiling. "I have no idea..."

"Sounds like stalker work to me," I warned her, sniffing coldly. "Has he leafed through your unmentionables yet?"

Sango gave me a hard look, a single eyebrow arched; as if to say, _are you kidding_?

I whistled slowly, "Okay, stupid question. It _is _a tad strange though."

"Not as strange as what happened today."

We let the statement hang for a while before I finally asked the inevitable question. For which she seemed to be oddly prepared. "What happened today?"

Then again, that idea went out the window as soon as she actually opened her mouth. Simultaneously as she did so her face blushed a vivid pink that was recognizable even in the dark.

"I wasn't doing anything," Sango began heatedly, "It was completely his move, I swear. I'm not a slut, I don't seduce everything that is distinguishably able to reproduce –"

"Slow down," I shushed suddenly. Out of breath, she lay panting for a second. "I don't mean to offend, but I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about." The panting gradually became stiff, forced breathing, like she was either very angry, or about to cry. My hand rested on her shoulder firmly, "Now, tell me calmly...what happened?"

Her large brown eyes were fixed adamantly on her busy thumbs, "I had just called Kirara. We were, talking about Kohaku."

I fought down a wince. The mere mention of her brother's name was enough to remind you of everything else that had happened to Sango, and those were not pleasant thoughts.

"When I hung up, I sort of sat there for a second by the window, and then all of a sudden Miroku showed up."

"Showed up like...how?" I questioned, "Like pop up? As in, 'I was eavesdropping?'"

She nodded, "I get the feeling that he was."

"Stalker," it came out like a hiss. "So what happened then?"

Swallowing once, she tilted her chin down a little and stopped twiddling her thumbs. "He gave me a hug."

"That was sweet. I would too."

"You don't get it..." she whispered. Her voice was suddenly filled with awe, "This was a _real _hug; and you know what he did next?"

"Surprise me."

Her throat emitted the smallest of giggles, "He _kissed _me."

There was a hushed silence for a second while we each tried to read to read the other's reaction in the dark. I'm pretty sure Sango didn't expect mine.

"Fucking bastard..." I growled vehemently.

She looked over at me in surprise, and in a delicate tone asked me why I was so upset.

"He took advantage of you!" I threw up my hands in disgust. "I think you should kick him out of the apartment.

"No, no, no..." Sango said, "You have it all wrong."

I glared back at her, "Oh yeah?"

Nodding, she took my hand in a very serious fashion, "I think he was being sincere."

With a disdainful snort I flopped backwards into the wall of pillows behind me. "Miroku's never been sincere once in his life."

Sango was moved into submission by my outburst and quietly lay back down herself, though she still held my hand. "I suppose your right..."

In the dark I could hear her sigh deeply, and realized immediately that she was crushed, and it was my fault. As much as I didn't want to admit that I was wrong, I felt that I had to, if I wanted to lift poor Sango's feelings. She'd had enough to handle emotionally for a while, and just as she was finally getting her hopes up, I'd come around to knock her down again.

"Hey," I began sweetly, "You never know..."

"What do you mean?" she asked flatly.

"Well, you could really be right. Anyone can change, especially for love."

She looked up curiously. "You think he's in love with me?"

I snickered at what I lead her to believe was her own naivete. "He's been living in an apartment with a gorgeous, good-natured person. I'm pretty sure he's had a hard time resisting falling in love with you."

I could see her light up gradually, and it was a very nice thing to watch. It was good to see Sango get cheered up once in a while, no matter what it took. Even if you had to lie.

On the other hand, I began to consider the fact that maybe she was right. Maybe Miroku was serious... Yet still, a voice in the back of my head insisted I come to my senses. Miroku? Falling in love? _Settling down_? When hell froze over.

Our thoughts and conversation were interrupted when the phone started ringing shrilly on my nightstand. It rang once or twice as we stared at it blankly before Sango nudged me and told me to answer it.

"Ah, oh, of course..." I said, feeling as though I'd just come out of a trance. As I was reaching out for it Inuyasha barked at me to answer the phone from the sewing room. Mimicking his voice sullenly I lifted the receiver and held it to my face.

"Hello?"

I could feel Sango's curious stare in the dark; she was straining to hear the conversation.

A familiar voice came to me over the connection, filled with enthusiastic happiness. "Kagome? Is that you?"

I paused, "...Yukari?"

"Yeah, yeah! It's me! Kagome, I have news for you..."

It had to be about the theater. My heart thumped wildly in the tense moments that followed while I waited for my sentence. All of my thoughts were balanced precariously in between the two outcomes of Yukari's phone call.

And then, in just a few, long, agonizing seconds, it all came crashing down.

"We chose _you_!"

Crashing down _excellently_.

It was like a weight had been lifted from me, and I screamed on the spot with complete ecstacy. Up until that point, I hadn't realized how much I had dearly wanted to be accepted at the theater. It wasn't until my happiness came gushing out in the bedroom that I was brought to earth, and it was so great that I forgot for a second that my ankle was wrapped up in bandages.

Yukari was squealing with delight on the other line, but I didn't listen to that for long; I slammed the phone down onto the bed and cheered to the ceiling with my arms twirling in the air.

Sango looked over at me awkwardly, having difficulty suppressing the little smile that was creeping to her lips. After watching me flail around singing wildly for a few seconds she tentatively asked me what had happened.

I halted in my display of extreme joy to turn to her and wrap my fingers stiffly over her shoulders. "I GOT IN!" I cried, shaking her slightly, "THEY CHOSE ME!"

At that moment Inuyasha came crashing through the door clutching a pair of scissors. "What's going on?!" He snapped fiercely, looking around the room as if expecting an attacker to appear out of nowhere.

"I GOT IN THE THEATER JACKASS!" I shouted, now throwing pillows over my head.

He blinked and frowned in confusion before it dawned on him. At which point he shook his fist in the air triumphantly and tried to think of something to say.

Sango, who had been very patient with the both of us, congratulated me politely and gave me a little hug. I was still blindly throwing things around though, so I didn't quite notice it. My pillow supply exhausted, I determined that the alarm clock was next and told Inuyasha to duck.

...................

Okay okay, review responses NOW. For whoever read the last chapter and left a note because...well...why not?

Sibby: Hey, glad you like it.

Tsuki Yume: Yeah, it takes me a while to put new chapters out. I'd like to say my summer romance had been keeping me busy or, 'you know those needy children in Africa, they're always so happy to see me,' but alas, no. I'm just lazy and unenthusiastic.

Ichigo: Yeah, I always thought Inuyasha had the potential to be gay. I mean, super feminist gay, minus the high voice. Can't you just see him wearing designer clothes and looking excellent? And besides, you heard that girl in the beginning episodes, she was wild for his hair. Does that not suggest that he pays a little extra attention to his mane? Plus he looked a little flattered if you ask me. Well anyway, I never disclose pairings unless I really don't care, so I can't tell you who Kagome gets with. Sorry.

acrimsonnight: Ha ha, glad you liked it! Time constraints are frequent in my department, yes, but there's always a moment to spare for fanfiction.net.

sashlea: Jake Lionheart is a name I made up. It struck me as being kind of "baby sister's club-ish." As for Inuyasha's temper, I'm trying to tame it gradually. The guy needs to loosen up, in the episodes he's always on edge. Another reason I thought he could be written as a gay character, he gets so pissy about everything. "A sliver?! I HATE EVERYONE!" Like that.

Now reccomendations:

Ariels by psycho pixie

**Ripples in the Sand **by Chickmooget

Everything by feathergurl

Myouga Strikes Back by Myouga Jiji

Moonstruck by Aiwendil Amaurea

Disease by psycho pixie

Nine Men And A Little Lady by Kielle

And The Secret Diaries for LOTR. Of course I almost died laughing reading these:

http:home.nyu.edu/amw243/diaries/


	9. The Boy Next Door

Okay, look, responses **NOW**. Aren't you _excited_?!

acrimsonnight: Awww, look at the nice long review! Thank you thank you thank you! Okay, let me answer your questions, if I can;

I'm going to boarding school. . .Let's see, I move in September 7th, yes. That is correct. I am going because, well, I applied for a scholarship to this particular place because it looked cool, art based education and what not, but I decided I wouldn't go if I didn't get the super huge scholarship because it's pretty fucking expensive for a place that isn't even a college. It seemed pointless. However, I got first runner up for that thing and then, they started dangling financial aid in front of my face _and then_, they started sending me all these letters and packages. I'm a sucker for attention. So I said yes, and now I'm going. That was a nice big long explanation, but you asked. . .Sorry if I bored you.

Yukari was beaming because in this story she's a bit out-of-it. The kind of person that's a weird combination of a soccer mom and a drug addict. However, she may have had hidden motives, you never know. . .

Yes, Hojo is a little sweetheart. I hate sweetness.

Well I'm not saying if it said, "I LOVE KAGOME." Hee hee, I'm a terrible tease. I make my poor readers guess at everything. Pretty soon they'll all hate my guts, just wait. But I will say this: supposing it _did _say that (and I'm not saying that it _didn't _either), it would be stalker-creepy, but in a cute kind of way. Hopefully.

I'm not going to tell you what person Kagome was unknowingly thinking of because it would spoil the surprise. :)

Well it _did _sound like stalker work. I wouldn't want somebody rifling through my underwear. Okay, it depends on just who would be doing the rifling. Hmm. . .

I'm so glad you're interested when I update! Ooo, I have a fan!

Love the long reviews, it's a comfort. Thanks!

ruinku: Hey, thanks for the support!

Tsuki Yume: Ha ha, good point. There are many many computers where I'm going, but they aren't necessarily the issue. The issue concerns time and the lack thereof. I guess I'll just have to make time, won't I?

MitsukiKikistar: Glad you got used to Inuyasha being gay. I don't know if you've noticed, but I didn't try to tweak his personality that much. He's basically the same character. Makes you wonder about his preferences in the series. . .You never know, maybe Kikyo actually shot him with the arrow because she caught him cheating with Jakotsu. Just kidding. Hey, thanks for the support, I'll bet Queer Eye _is _his favorite show. Ha ha.

...................

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha for cripes sake. Quit sending people after me.

..........

Chapter 9-The Boy Next Door

..............

I was sitting on a bench massaging my ankle. The room had wood floors, one wall was all mirror. To the casual observer, it looked like a dancing studio. Lucky guess. It was. But for actors.

My fingers fondled the heel of my foot appreciatively, it had been little over five days since I had gotten my cast removed, and I was enjoying ever minute of it. It wouldn't be easy to forget that cast. I mean, _hell_. It was so itchy by the time I went in to get it taken off that Inuyasha had already had to rip sharp objects out of my hands on several occasions. I'll admit that I'm rather confident, even when I know what I'm doing is impossible; like, for example, cutting a cast off with safety scissors.

Everyone had signed it. I eventually got so bored that I forced myself to manage with the crutches, and Inuyasha wasn't about to carry me to work either. So when I made it into the hall very gradually word spread and people came out of their rooms with felt-tip markers in their hands. Sango of course gave me her signature, and Miroku. Inuyasha wrote something rude and crude where I couldn't see that made all the ladies gasp.

And then, when I made it to the theater to sign some forms and what not, everyone there signed it. Even people that I didn't know. I'm pretty sure the entire staff there made their mark on my bandages, except for Kikyo. However, I'm not complaining.

From my family, I got a single phone call from my mother and a cute little get well card from Souta, which was given a permanent honorary space on my bedroom windowsill. My mother, though she got points for speaking to me, was hardly as cute. She managed to express her concern half-heartedly with no malice, but no real worry either. She also represented dad, who apparently cared just as much as she did and was only allowed a brief mention in a very short string of comments related to my injury.

I continued to wait on the bench. These practices were starting just in time for me to get used to life without a hurt foot again. Well, not really practices, they were more like auditions. Again. This time, however, it was for a part.

Yukari had given me all the details over the phone shortly after I had finished celebrating destructively. My eyes wandered to the place on my arm where I had sketched out everything she told me in black marker. Several showers later it was faint and somewhat difficult to read, but the essentials were still there. I squinted at my skin for a while before raising my head and looking around. It was a bit lonely sitting there all by myself, and I blamed the absence of everyone else on the fact that I had shown up an hour later so as not to risk an accident similar to the one I had just experienced regarding an audition.

But time was running out for everyone, and now I was starting to worry that Yukari had told me to come to the wrong room in the theater to meet my fellow actors. Yet I had no other options but to continue to sit on the bench and wait, so that was what I did.

A few more minutes passed, and I grew more and more tense as they passed. My fascination with my foot had dwindled and I was very soon completely absorbed with concern. It would not be good to mess up my first day, I wouldn't be rid of the embarrassment for weeks. Then again, I knew in the back of my head that Hojo would smile and help me recover in the presence of people who were far more experienced than I was, and thus the superiors I was trying to impress. Yeah, Hojo wouldn't let me crash and burn so easily.

Just then, my thoughts were interrupted as someone began opening the door. I sat up immediately and began walking towards it, immensely relieved and already talking non-stop.

"Hi," I said jovially, "Are you here for the auditions too? Is this the right room? I've been sitting here for a while, I don't know if I'm where I should be, I'm new, I – "

My mouth shut with a nearly-audible snap as a pretty woman with waist-length black hair emerged from behind the door and closed it silently with a withering stare directed solely at me. Kikyo.

A well of anger stirred in me at the sight of her, but I quieted it thinking that this was not the time to hold grudges. It was a time for fresh starts, and I was going to take advantage of it. Dropping my surprise, I smiled politely. "Hello," I said again.

She smiled, badly. My first thought was that the half-sneer, narrow-eyed 'smile' was a poor attempt at making me believe that she wasn't actually thinking something that didn't yield a smile – about me. Then I remembered that Kikyo was an actress and realized that she could have summoned a decent fake smile if she'd wanted to, and this evil look was the real thing. It was the kind of look that stereotypical, snobby, rich old ladies give to everyone else just before they say something like, "charmed." Kikyo did not say "charmed." Kikyo didn't say anything at all.

But I was determined, and decided that she would get used to me if I continued to express the fact that I meant her no harm. "You're here for the auditions, right?" I asked her innocently.

Her murderous smile faded immediately. "Of course I am."

Well _excuse _me. Third time's a charm, I told myself with dwindling faith in my plan to make amends. "So I'm in the right room?"

"I would think so," she snapped coldly.

"Ahh...Great." I looked around uselessly, "Well, that's a relief."

She didn't respond. Just stared at me icily with the poise of a statue.

Stupidly, I tried again to make small conversation and devoted my entire attention to her once more, "So have you been an actress long?"

I should have seen it coming. Nine times out of ten when something is unnaturally quiet and evil, it's two seconds away from going off. Albeit, it was a rather silent explosion, but an explosion nonetheless, and one that stung very much at that.

Kikyo advanced on me a few steps like a panther stalking it's prey, and stopped abruptly about a foot away. Then, looking down at me from above, she started to speak in heated tones with vocabulary that was as sleek and dangerous as the edge of a knife.

"I haven't the slightest idea what Adrian and Myouga were thinking, but I can tell you right now that _I _certainly wasn't thinking the same thing," she began, "I would like you to know that in my opinion you have the acting ability of a rock and it is highly unfortunate that I was the only one competent enough to realize that. However, the fact that you managed to flagrantly seduce the rest of the judges does not in any way mean that you are actually deserving of the station you've been so stupidly granted. I'm sure that up until now you've allowed yourself to believe that you actually have the skill to participate in this theater but I assure you," she leaned in closely, and hissed, "it doesn't exist. I advise you not to pretend that you're something you're not, because I can see straight through your poorly acted performance."

I stood there blinking several moments, caught completely off-guard by Kikyo's sudden outburst. My mouth opened a little as I was about to say something, and as it did so I could feel the tears collecting in my eyes.

But just then, as I was on the verge of bursting into tears and expressing some sort of pathetic comeback to Kikyo, Hojo and Yukari bounced through the door together. Yukari ran to me immediately and gave me several happy pats on the back with a string of congratulatory compliments while Hojo emerged at her side, smiling.

As Yukari threw her arms around me in a crushing hug, my eyes wandered back to Kikyo over her shoulder and I saw that she was grinning darkly. Then Hojo attracted my attention, as his companion had released me and he was stepping up to the plate shyly. Swallowing my tears, I gave him a little smile, and felt my hurt disappearing gradually as he gave me a look that suggested he was purely enjoying just standing near me. Then, before I had much time to react, he wrapped me up in a tender sort of embrace.

I hugged him back, suddenly finding myself in a realm of bliss, when again my gaze was pulled back to Kikyo. She had a different look on her face that time. It was one of shock, surprise, and then it became one that was calculating. I didn't bother trying to figure out what she was thinking though. I didn't want to know.

"Oooo! I'm so happy you got in Kagome!" Yukari was still squirming with glee beside me.

Hojo let me go awkwardly and I smiled up at him. His face was a vivid red and I found the fact that he was still old enough to blush and fumble around in the presence of girls to be absolutely adorable. It was a dream for me, a sensitive guy who A) wasn't gay, B) blushed, C) stuttered a little when nervous, D) liked theater (and _still_, not gay!), E) wasn't Kouga, and finally, F) wasn't Inuyasha either. Kikyo's harsh reprimand hovered in the background of the moment, stamping its foot for attention that it certainly wouldn't get from _me _anymore.

I turned to Yukari, filled with a passiveness that made me more calm and content than I had been in days. Suddenly I felt like I was a head above the rest, and Hojo was the only one level with me. Together we looked down on everyone else, not in a prideful sort of way, but just happy, bright, enjoying each other's company at the top of the world where we suddenly understood everything.

"Thanks Yukari," I said gently, watching her jump up and down, grinning.

"We're going to have so much fun!" she clapped her hands once. I saw Kikyo set her purse on the floor and pull out a water bottle from the corner of my eye. She looked around at the walls with disgust while screwing and unscrewing the top of her bottle as if it were her sinister weapon of torture. She really didn't strike me as a particularly happy person.

People filed into the room gradually, some greeted Kikyo, until the crowd grew large enough so that she was lost in it. Nearly every one of them found me where I stood, practically clinging to Hojo and Yukari, my only connections in the little sea of faces, and congratulated me somehow. In the earlier moments before there were many actors in the room, I was sufficiently introduced. By the time Mr. Grey had arrived to conduct us around into some form of order, I had learned quite a few names.

He waved around and called out in his deep, resonant voice, telling us to quiet down. At first he suggested forming a circle, but that idea was lost in the crowd of persistent voices and eventually he just settled for standing on top of an overturned crate from the corner to continue to tell us to shut up. When we did, he began speaking loudly about what the agenda for the next few hours would be like.

"Now," his arms dropped to his sides, "Today we are going to start trying to form a cast for our next project, Romeo and Juliet. But first, I would like you all to acknowledge the presence of our latest fellow actor, Kagome Higurashi."

I pulled a Hojo and went pink as many sets of eyes came to rest on me. One at a time was fine, but when they all suddenly decided to stare at me it was almost too much. Performing in front of an audience was going to be tough.

They burst into applause immediately after they'd trained their gazes on me, and Mr. Grey smiled fondly. I returned the smile, with a little difficulty because I was still trying to get used to all the attention. Instead of being hurt or insulted, I knew suddenly that out in the room Kikyo was probably sulking bitterly and her hands were undoubtedly folded or at her sides, but they most definately weren't clapping. My thoughts on the subject at the time were something like: fine, if the bitch doesn't want to applaud me, fuck her.

As the cheering faded, Mr. Grey's voice leapt up again and a plan of action was formed.

......................

We were going out alphabetically. Out and in front of a decent crowd of about fifty people to read snippets of dialogue from a sheet of paper. This was not what I was used to, doing the acting thing in front of a group, a _big _group. My experience came to about two or three elementary school plays and my tryout before three good-natured guys and a woman with the temperament of a wet cat.

Hojo and Yukari had last names that came before mine, and so I watched them. They were both bright and splendid, and had roughly the same style about them. Secretly I was crossing my fingers for Hojo, thinking in the back of my mind of him as Romeo, and what was steadily appearing impossible, me as Juliet. There was no harm done if we were acting like we were in love, was there? No, no harm at all, purely innocent. However, if Yukari and Hojo both acted roughly the same, we had a problem. There couldn't be _two _Romeos.

Kikyo stepped up, and gave a performance that, I cannot deny, was pretty darn good. Deciding that it would sting all the more if I made it obvious that her shower of insults was on par with the buzzing of a fly to me, I clapped heartily for her so that she saw me in the crowd. Then I made sure to mouth the words, "good job," and wink. She looked furious.

But my entertainment and comfort were short-lived when I was ousted from my spot among the actors and nudged onto the stage of the upturned crate. The expectations of lots of people was weighing on me tremendously, but I found that all I had to do was keep my lifelines clearly in my head. Hojo and the prospect of being his Juliet, and Kikyo and the prospect of beating her to pieces.

It was over shortly, and when I was finished I listened closely to the muttering that swept the people before me before strong applause reached my ears. My eyes found what had very shortly become my arch-nemesis and I gave her an enthusiastic thumbs up with a huge, open smile. Having finished reaping the benefits of a performance well-completed in theater bully department, I shifted my attention to Hojo and Yukari.

Yukari was jumping around energetically, something that was making me think more and more of her as a ferret, and Hojo was still clapping. He lifted his hand up and out to me, and after a few puzzled moments on my behalf I realized what he was doing and let him help me off the crate, a pointless thing that made me glow all over.

To my dismay, the process was repeated, this time, more selectively. Mr. Grey had been taking notes the entire time, and using them as a guide, he called names out randomly and this time, those who were called were shuffled into a room off to the side. The next phase of the operation was more relaxed, so I was too. There weren't people all around to make me nervous anymore.

I did my bit, Hojo and Yukari, who were also called, did theirs. So did Kikyo, and all the rest, and then that was done.

But before we were to breath easy, call backs were once again initiated. But this time, the contenders of the fight were few. They consisted of Kikyo, Hojo, and Me. Kikyo and Hojo entered the ring together first, with their heads held high, and left me standing with Yukari outside the door, free to speculate about the goings on inside.

A few minutes later Kikyo emerged, alone, and paused once in her step to give me a look obviously reserved for the very lowest creatures of the earth; namely me. . .and just about everyone else. I took her place inside after Yukari wished me good luck.

Hojo was standing with Mr. Grey and Myouga, who up until then I hadn't noticed in the swarm of actors. They were conversing quietly when I walked in, and then at my entrance Hojo was left by himself as the other two retreated to their seats, which had been set up just a few feet from us.

I walked to him with my hands folded on top of each other, primp and sweet as a junior high girl. Mr. Myouga announced to me that Hojo had officially been chosen for the part of Romeo, and my heart soared. Immediately I drew my own conclusions, and decided that my presence could only mean one thing. . .

They were considering me for Juliet.

Acting with Hojo was a breeze. I was more comfortable than I felt I'd been in a long while, and just let the words tumble out of my mouth with a pretty picture of myself bedecked in a flowing gown, leaning over a balcony and expressing my love to Hojo in front of a fake full moon and castle courtyard in mind.

Before I knew it, it was over again, and I was looking up into my partner's eyes in the wake of a sudden rush of blissful peace again. I would have been content to just stand there and waver before him like a flower, but Mr. Grey yanked me away from that idea.

He thanked Hojo and myself for our performance, and together we left. As we were walking out the door, the most amazingly wonderful thing happened.

I felt a hand snake around mine gently, and my eyelashes fluttered. Hojo gave my fingers a quick squeeze and whispered, "You did very well, Kagome." Then without another word, he released my hand and Yukari faced us from where she'd been waiting next to the door.

...............

"Romeo will be played by Hojo. . ." A last name was no longer necessary for Hojo. He was so well known and loved in the theater that everyone just called him Hojo, or picked from a variety of nicknames.

There was a wave of clapping, not very wild because it was expected news. He regularly secured large parts in the plays, often leads, and Yukari had already spread the news eagerly when we told her after coming out of the room.

Myouga grinned and hesitated, his eyes hovering over the recently compiled cast list. I knew that he was about to announce who was to play Juliet.

It'd taken a while, the rest of the auditions. The parts of the main characters was important, but hardly the biggest concern of the directors of the play, Mr. Grey and Myouga. There was a whole other bunch of parts to deal with. So after tackling one bit of the equation, they moved on to sort everything else out, and according to plan, made a cast list.

To be exact, it'd taken several hours. My name was not called again, and neither was Hojo's, but Yukari's was. In the many minutes surrounding her leaving us for the room of doom, we sat together on the floor, the three of us, and played cards with a deck that Hojo had brought along.

"Juliet will be played by. . ."

I pretended to look unconcerned while my hand, still clutching a royal flush, drooped slowly. Yukari was chewing on a pen, and it sagged as well. The fingers that were reaching towards the stack of cards in the middle of our group fell to the ground inch by inch as Hojo stared as well. Gravity pulled on the three of us in the heat of the moment.

.......

Thunderous applause, Yukari screaming in my ear, Hojo almost falling over in excitement and surprise and sending all the cards flying. I looked out at everyone, trying to breath with arms clamped so tightly around my neck. A spray of cards glittered like party confetti in front of my eyes.

There was a rush of ecstacy roiling around inside of my gut. I was no longer wasting time with wimpy emotions like "passivity" and "happiness." I wasn't taking any prisoners, I felt like I'd just won the game show of the century, and I was fucking _ecstatic_.

Hojo was grinning next to me a twinkle in his eye, the boy next door. . . In years to come I'd find myself looking around for that very smile, feeling a little let down when I failed to spot another like it, or the same one. It was the moment and the circumstances that made us both, Hojo and me, so wonderfully pleased.

I didn't know it then, but trouble was brewing on the horizon. I'd really gotten things going when I'd gotten that part. Hadn't actually expected the situation to go so far. . .but it did.

.................

Perfect activity for a rainy day, updating. Second only to _playing _in the rain. Hm. . .


	10. The Price is Wrong Bitch, the Price is W...

Am not a mean person. If you think so, you really haven't seen anything yet. But I'm **not **doing review responses. Just too out-of-it.

......

Disclaimer: Not mine. Don't even _think _of pointing that finger this way.

.........

Chapter 10-The Price is Wrong Bitch, the Price is **Wrong**.

..................

I was sitting in a restaurant, having found myself in the company of lunatics. Again.

Inuyasha had arranged the entire evening with the attention to detail of someone who couldn't possibly be straight. I never found out to what extent he'd tried to control the event, but quite suspected he'd even attempted to order the angle of the silverware to the edge of the table. I wouldn't put it past him.

The gathering was rather large. Very fun though, I had to admit. The best part was that it was all for _me._ I chose to remember this at particularly awkward moments, after discovering that I was being consistently reintroduced to people I hadn't seen in about three years. I could only wonder as to how Inuyasha had managed to summon them all to the location after only a week's notice, and how he had even persuaded them to care in the first place.

A mental picture of Sadie, my friend from boarding school who happened to live in the city, finding the invitation among her usual mail. "Kagome Higurashi is going to play Juliet?! Marvelous! I _must _attend this party!" Sadie already had a family of four to run; a husband and twins, and the next scene in my daydream featured her herding them into a minivan in their best attire like a swat team on the move.

"It was nice of him to do all this, wasn't it?" Sango said casually. I looked up at her from across the table. An array of glasses lay between us.

Nodding, I let my head settle in my hands. "Yeah, really nice." There was a pause as I peered out at the patio where many couples had started dancing under the stars. "He makes such a fuss over me sometimes."

"It's a great party," Miroku said from beside Sango. He'd brushed up quite a bit in a very short amount of time. Surrounded by free alcohol, he hadn't had even a single shot since the whole party business had started roughly three hours ago. His shirt was hardly ruffled. And if it was, it was to look disheveled and hot, which he was. Lucky Sango.

My head bobbed again, and I continued to stare out at the patio. Inuyasha drifted by, dancing with Rin. It was adorable, older brother dancing with younger sister, how precious. I cooed at them as they passed, and Sango smiled. She had also been watching them.

"It's so sweet," she whispered.

I giggled, "He loves her so much. He'd do anything for Rin."

"He'd do anything for _you_," Miroku said.

"I can think of about ninety things he would never, in a million years, do for me," I countered with a note of disdain. "Rin is different. I mean it, he'd do _anything _for her."

"They both would."

I looked up, "Both?"

"Sesshomaru and Inuyasha," Miroku explained. Sango turned to him curiously, with a look in her eyes that was daring him to say another word, but would be greatly amused if he did.

"They both what?"

He smiled at me cunningly. A, "you're sweet," kind of smile. I hated that, but let it pass, expecting an answer that would quell my anger. Instead he said, "Nothing, nevermind."

Though dissatisfied, I decided to let him keep his secrets, as they were no doubt filthy and unfit for the ears of children.

Inuyasha came up to us after a few more sleepy, burnt out snippets of conversation. The three of us were getting more tired with each passing moment, but our friend, on the other hand, was completely alive. He settled himself in a chair beside me. High on caffeine and excitement, he looked around at all of us eagerly.

"Come on!" he chirped, "The party's just started!"

Sango rubbed her eyes drowsily, "Then why do I feel like I'm about to pass out?"

Inuyasha frowned at her, and turned his attention expectantly to Miroku. "There's a sea of women yet to experience your touch out there," he shook his finger, as if he were reprimanding him for not getting to work sooner.

Miroku gave him a half-smile. "No, I don't think I'm up to that business tonight." I was quite sure I saw his eyes flick to Sango and back, lightening-quick.

"Go," she said, lifting herself from the nest she'd made for her chin with her arms, "Knock yourself out, don't worry about us."

He scratched her back affectionately, "You sound really tired."

"I _am _really tired. Go have a good time."

"Go for it Miroku," I insisted, gripping his shoulder from across the table, "You must carry on the legacy."

"Damned straight," Inuyasha cheered, his fist shaking triumphantly in the air.

"What legacy?" Miroku asked me, looking baffled.

I shrugged, "I don't know, but it needs carrying, doesn't it?"

His confusion only visibly deepened, so I gave up and just flashed him a toothy grin. "Come on, Sango wants you to."

Even with her head buried in her folded arms, I could see the blush creeping all the way up to her ears, and Miroku probably saw it too, because his eyes had returned to her in his hesitancy. He looked back at me, "Fine."

Inuyasha let loose a war cry and stood up, sending the glasses trembling and clinking delicately all around us. Miroku went to his side, but just as they were about to set out into the dance floor, a hand fell in front of my face. "May I have this dance?"

"No way Inuyasha, I can't leave Sango all alone."

She moaned her disapproval and shooed me away like a fly with a limp hand. "Please go, I can hardly stand your foul presence anymore."

Smiling, I placed my hand in his and allowed him to pull me up to my feet. His other hand fell on my waist, while I let mine hang on his shoulder. Grinning fiendishly he guided us both in a mighty twirl away from the table, with Miroku following us silently, looking very entertained at our antics.

We entered the crowd on the patio gracefully, spinning around to a waltz that the band was playing from their platform at one end of the floor. Faces whirled past us, only a quarter of which I recognized. "You invited so many people!" I said to Inuyasha, awed.

He beamed with pride, happy that someone had commented on what he seemed to think of as a very high achievement. "Thanks."

I continued to look around at everyone we drifted by, "I don't know most of them."

Inuyasha laughed, and brought me near his knees in a dip, "How strange, and it's _your _party."

"A party for what?" I asked shortly when I was returned to my proper footing, my hair flying in front of my nose irritably.

"The start of your acting career!" He said heatedly as I spun for him with as much grace as I could muster in high heels, which I had come to distrust since my ankle incident.

I sniffed and hissed at a stray tendril that refused to leave my range of vision. It tickled my nose teasingly and fluttered in the air I blew at it, but refused to move. Growing more annoyed with each second that it lingered in front of me, I began thrashing my head a little to shake it away.

While I was so foolishly caught up with a few stray hairs, Inuyasha suddenly gasped in delight, "Riba!" He exclaimed. "We must dance!" I continued to snap at the source of my frustration. "Hold on to this for me, won't you?"

Before I had a second to realize what was going on, I was pushed from Inuyasha's arms, suddenly reduced to just a thing "to be held on to." But I was not stranded for long, alone on the dance floor. I sailed into the arms of the person to be doing the holding unceremoniously, like a football being passed around. The person held me awkwardly for a moment or two before I finally succeeded in ousting the hair from my face and was able to comfortably raise my eyes to his face, a little perturbed at Inuyasha's sudden abandonment.

I went rigid with shock in an instant, and then gathered my wits again quickly. "Hello Sesshomaru."

He looked down at me, holding my right hand with one of his own, his other laying on my shoulder strangely. In as flash the uncertainty vanished from his eyes and he resumed looking emotionless as he usually did. "Inuyasha has left you," he noted from several inches above me. Sesshomaru was very, very tall, but hardly intimidating to me anymore after having known him for so long.

I sighed distantly, "Yes, and after leading me on like that." My head shook hopelessly, and my eyes followed my former dance partner across the floor, in the arms of my co-worker then. They had left the grace of waltzing and were making themselves quite content with modern, spontaneous moves. A crowd was starting to gather around them.

My gaze jumped back to Sesshomaru's face, and I smiled gently, "Shall we dance?"

The very smallest of smiles crept to his lips, that was more of a smirk, if anything. He placed his hand on my hip, and I couldn't help the rise of heat that flared inside of me at the intimate touch. "Yes."

I took hold of his shoulder, and together we began to move. Under his direction, we were flawless. It was like being liquid, just letting him move me around the way he did. For a while I simply allowed him to guide me, I didn't even try to strike up a conversation. The stars spun above us, the band played harmoniously, and Sesshomaru pulled us into a more secluded part of the patio.

Soon I found it very easy to forget that he was my best friend's older brother. I found it easy to forget that they had always had a silent war. That he never showed a shred of emotion, and for all I knew, he was probably suffering as the minutes passed by, hoping to God that I would ask to stop dancing so he could wash his hands. I found it easy to forget that what I didn't know about him could fill several books. That he was such a mystery to me. In fact, I allowed myself to remember only one thing about Sesshomaru: that he made me feel safe.

It was true. Whenever I discovered that I was in his company I felt an immediate calm wash over me. It wasn't necessarily alluring, it didn't suggest that we had a secret love affair, that we were deeply passionate about each other, or that we had a unique attraction that was purely natural. I had just accepted it as a fact of life after a while, that when I saw him hanging around I would sort of think, 'Oh yes, Inuyasha's brother, there he is. He seems so much older than everyone, he's so quiet and wise, I'm sure he'll keep the peace around here. Yes, there he is.' I blame this assumption of mine that he made things automatically secure everywhere he went on his close protection of Rin, which I'd seen in action many times.

Very gradually, the distance between our bodies shrank, until with the effect of an earthquake from my perspective, our chests collided. I gasped, and almost stopped, but he didn't even falter. After a few tense moments of resting against him, my heartbeat slowed and returned to its normal pace; I relaxed into him, and very soon found myself resisting the urge to let my head fall on him.

"You're an amazing dancer," I said eventually. "Much better than Inuyasha."

I suspect that pleased him. Sesshomaru always seemed to enjoy one-upping Inuyasha, and vice versa. Typical brotherly behavior. However, it did not please him enough to respond. He just remained silent, and my desire to lean completely into him grew.

Time passed smoothly again, and we continued to dance closely together. I wondered vaguely how Sango or Miroku would react if they saw us, or even Rin or Shippou. But then, I would react similarly if I saw any of them dancing together, and they probably were at that point.

"Would you like to stop?" His voice startled me out of my sleepy thoughts.

I looked up at him, surprised, "What? No, no. . .I'm fine."

"You're exhausted," he insisted coldly.

Again I told him that I was perfectly all right and he shouldn't bother. He did bother though, and in a very unexpected way. We had taken only a few more steps before he suggested that I rest my head on him, just the thing I'd been dying to do for a long time.

"What?" I was completely confounded by his statement, which sounded very much like a demand.

His golden eyes narrowed, "If you refuse to stop, I will have to ask that you rest your head on me."

"But I'm fine!" Odd request.

A dangerous stare was my only answer. That alone was scary enough to bully me into doing what he asked, but on top of that, the temptation was maddening. The skin of my somewhat exposed chest already told me that he was a delightful pillow. It was as if it was barking up at my chin, telling it that the water was fine. Somewhat reluctantly, I turned my head to the side and let it fall little by little onto him.

The effect it had on me was immediate. I was lulled by the steady, even beating of his heart, the gliding motions of our dancing, and the softness of his shirt and toned chest combined. While I started to succumb to sleep, his grip on me tightened, holding me even more firmly against him lest I fall in my weakness.

He never protested once to my closeness, though he did frequently ask if I wanted to stop. Each time I said no, with an increasing slur arising in my voice.

The patio dissolved under our feet, and soon I realized brightly that we were dancing in the sky. I raised my head and giggled at him, and he smiled back openly. The floor trembled like water each time our feet landed on it, sending little circles scattering around.

I sighed in bliss as we started to fall gently; rather, Sesshomaru was lowering me. The scene changed bit by bit into one of trees spread out all around us. They were flowering trees that shed their large, billowy petals in a snow of white on the breeze that swept through them.

My body connected very softly with the ground, landing on a lovely carpet of the blossoms. Sesshomaru was still hovering above me, but he too drifted down towards my face when I had settled down on my plush mattress. I waited for his presence beside me, but heard a voice instead.

It was Inuyasha's.

"You fell asleep on Sesshomaru," he said, and there was unmistakable mockery in his words, "And I am _never _going to let you forget it."

My vision swayed and swept around the inside of a cab before I slipped out of consciousness yet again. Cabs were number two on the top ten list of places where I'd fallen asleep the most. And down at the very bottom of that list, another entry was made:

Sesshomaru.

............

He wasn't kidding.

Oh, did I _hate _him.

Pouring over my newly acquired script at the breakfast table, he was there to break my concentration.

"You slept on Sesshomaru. Funny how much that sounds like, _slept with _Sesshomaru."

"Shut the fuck up Romeo – er, Inuyasha."

Talking to Hojo on the phone, he was there to spoil our chances together.

"Does he know you slept with Sesshomaru?"

After putting my hand politely over the phone, "It was _slept on_, and I swear I'll shove this phone straight up your ass if you don't leave immediately."

Helping Miroku clean his apartment that he shared with Sango, Inuyasha was out to spread gossip through the fastest connection.

"Hello?" Miroku would lift the phone to his ear with a broom in the other hand.

"You're fond of this type of subject, surely you're interested in the fact that Kagome slept with Sesshomaru?"

Thankfully, he had apparently dropped his affection for such. "You already told me Inuyasha."

Meanwhile I was storming out the door and across the hall with a bottle of cleaning fluid to spray mercilessly into my 'best friend's' eyes.

Screw being 'worried for me.' Inuyasha changed in a heartbeat with no trouble at all. A new relationship after Kouga? His first reaction would be to act concerned. But as soon as heard that this nonexistent post-Kouga thing involved Sesshomaru, his very subtle nemesis, Inuyasha eagerly jumped at the opportunity to torment us both, or so he imagined. I was quite certain at the time that Sesshomaru didn't give a flying rat's ass about the whole thing. Either that or he was still furiously rinsing his hands.

It didn't matter to me so much after a while. Every now and then Inuyasha would make under jab at me, but soon, he got tired of it. His eyes didn't cease glinting whenever Sesshomaru and I happened to be in the same room for a while though.

...........

I quit my job. It was difficult, and the ladies made a horrible fuss. Especially Riba. Sheri didn't seem to give a shit; in fact, I suspect she was somewhat happy. When I broke the news to my group in the coffee room, Riba screamed, Kaede burst into tears, Sheri sucked idly on an aspirin and watched the progress of a fly trying to land near the smoldering remains of her last cigarette.

I sniffed at her dejectedly, having expected a larger reaction, but my cool demeanor was suddenly chucked way off balance, like the rest of me, when Jordan threw her arms around my neck. "I'm going to miss you _so much_," she shrieked into my hair. My fingers tapped her head affectionately to keep her from exploding into tears like her co-worker.

That very co-worker made us all jump suddenly when she snorted loudly into a handkerchief. When her puffy face emerged from the wet mess he held in her hands, her watery eyes stared at me. "Why are you leaving?" she asked me in a small voice.

I hesitated and tried to form an answer in my head. Their sudden outbursts were a little unnerving. "Um well, remember when I told you all about the theater stuff? How I got Juliet?"

The nodded like a single person, except for Sheri, who was still glowering at the fly. I continued apprehensively, "I've decided that it would be best, if, you know, I quit my job here."

"Why?" Riba snapped, looking completely prepared to break my neck.

"It takes up a lot of time..." I said while I gently coaxed Jordan off of me; she complied reluctantly.

They grumbled and growled, shifting on their feet uncomfortably. Each one of them knew and remembered the support they'd given me through the whole ordeal, from my first audition to my second. On top of that, they remembered how much they'd cheered when I secured my part as Juliet, and when I'd been accepted as a start.

However, from the filthy looks Kaede and Riba were tossing my way, I could tell that they distinctly didn't want me to leave the building. I shrugged as nonchalantly as possible, "Sorry."

Jordan sighed and shook her head around like she was trying to shake something out of her ear. "Okay," she said blankly, and then with renewed strength, she looked up at me, "Okay," it was firmer that time. I was given another hug, though it was more relaxed and less threatening than the last one. "I'm happy for you," Jordan stepped back from me and stared down at her feet, "This is what you really wanted, this part. I'm really glad you got it. You'll keep in touch though, right?"

I nodded, "Of course."

Kaede also released a long, deep breath. "Naturally you'll be letting us know when you perform, won't you?"

Again I nodded fervently, "Yes, yes, I will."

Lastly, Riba came forward. I cowered a little, expecting some form of verbal abuse, which I knew from experience she was quite capable of. Instead, much to my surprise, she stepped forward and, smiling broadly, wrapped me up in a great bear hug. Whilst patting my back gruffly, she shouted, "You deserve this chance!"

And again to my complete surprise, she let me go sobbing. Seeing Riba in such an emotional state made my lower lip involuntarily start to tremble. For a second I felt a pang of regret, leaving the work place I had come to adore; and even more lethal to my ego, who would replace me? _Me_! An urge to snarl surged inside of me, just considering this idea of a renegade outsider staking her claim on what was unarguably _my _territory. Pfft!

"When do you leave?" Sheri asked, the only sign of life she had shown since I'd broken the news. The remains of the fly were twitching gruesomely near a rolled up newspaper on the plastic table.

"I already gave my notice two weeks ago. This is my last day," I said glumly. Jordan wailed.

Looking around at all of them, listening to Kaede and Jordan explain over and over again how much they would miss me, wringing their hands and my hands and begging me to drop by for visits or make calls or send e-mails, I realized that this was not at all what I had been expecting. Just a quiet goodbye was all I had in mind, certainly no tears. My regret swelled, and so did my guilt; they really _would _miss me.

"I promise I'll keep you all informed on everything," I insisted consolingly, "And you keep me informed on how you all are doing too, okay?"

The agreed in unison, except for Sheri, of course. She just wasn't a team player.

"And don't give the new girl..._too _hard of a time," I added as an afterthought.

.........

And now for the rehearsal that would change me for years to come. The fateful day I learned just how vile Kikyo really was.

It was my very first real rehearsal, after a few meetings for simply running through the script with the main characters gathered around a long table, and there were several instances when everything was halted so that I could stop looking so excited and giddy and focus on being distraught about the forbidden love I was sharing with Hojo – I mean, Romeo.

But what my thoughts were really spinning around was the kiss. The kiss to end all kisses, no tongue, but just as passionate; my character was pouring her heart and soul out through the icy-dead lips of her true love.

Perfect, you couldn't have asked for a more excellent first date; and that was what I playfully thought of it as, deep down. Screw the movie angle, we were Romeo and Juliet, and we would kiss like no other two people ever did.

There were other scenes of romance throughout the play, but nothing had been planted in the script so moving as the final kiss. I could hardly wait.

And lo, before I knew it, it was upon me. I pined in agony over the lifeless body of my significant other, moaned about the poison spent on him, shed my tears, bent my head. My lips brushed softly against his, and we both went still for a moment; I relaxed first, and pressed myself more deeply onto him with a hand clasped over his shoulder for support. When the kiss was broken, I opened my eyes and saw that his cheeks were rosy-red, which sort of ruined the moment a little.

That, and the fact that I had to pretend I was stabbing myself about ten seconds later.

Still, the high didn't wear off for a while, until just after the rehearsal was over and done with. Everyone was gathered in the changing rooms, which doubled as the bathrooms, and a type of lounge area. There were plush chairs gathered around a low coffee table, and even a mini-kitchen complete with a microwave, sink, coffee maker (we liked coffee, a lot), and cupboards that never had anything in them.

I was in my own dressing room, something that I hadn't stopped fussing over for a week and a half, packing my script away and entertaining the last few people that had stuck around to say I did a good job, for my first time performing. The dressing room wasn't anything huge, small, with a chair and mirror, and a little sofa. The main characters always had dressing rooms like these set aside, because they had to be in so many scenes and it was helpful to have a single place to keep all of their costumes.

There had been a steady stream of visitors coming through and knocking on my door since the end of practice, all wishing me good luck for next time or congratulating me again on winning the part or even making suggestive comments regarding Hojo that I didn't mind a bit.

Yukari was the last to leave, and had sat on my sofa chatting with me even after everyone else had left. It was then that I expressed my thoughts about my co-star for the first time, to anyone.

She reacted well.

"_Really?!_" a squeal, then, "That's great! You're perfect for each other! I always suspected that you had a thing for each other, and was like, 'yes! That's so cool!'" Then a dark, knowing look came over her. "But, hey...are you okay with it?"

I blinked, "What do you mean?"

She fumbled around, "I mean...you know, Kouga..."

My face fell, "O-oh...Well..."

Yukari made a series of stressed gestures, "Oh no! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said anything! Forget I said anything, sorry!"

I brushed her concern off gently, "No, it's no problem. I just think, the sooner I get over him, the better. This is one step that's definately in the _right _direction, for once." Wrong.

She smiled at me, "I agree."

When she finally left me, I hung around for a while, watching my reflection in the mirror. We hadn't discussed anything more than how nice it was I had a girly crush on Hojo. What we _should _have discussed was my plan of action, because I was certainly clueless.

I talked to myself too. I weighed the pros and cons of a relationship, I actually willed myself to think about Kouga, and I just had to figure out if it was a risk worth taking. I wasn't really afraid of rejection, I'd been through that times ten. And...I _knew _Hojo had something for me too. I just knew it. The way he blushed when I was around, the way he looked at me, and the way he talked to me. We had something.

So I decided, just to prove to myself that I really wasn't afraid of being turned down, I'd march right up to him the very next chance I got and ask him what should be done. That filled me with pride and confidence. Something would happen, I'd already promised myself.

With my bag slung over my shoulder, positively bursting with good thoughts and intentions, I left my dressing room and began walking down the hall towards the exit. But I halted, when I saw Hojo's dressing room door, slightly ajar with light flooding through it.

My heart pounded, and my own vow came rushing back to me from the moment I'd spoken it to my reflection. _"I'll make the first move...next opportunity I get." _I ran a hand through my hair nervously and looked up at the barren, white ceiling, saying in the very softest possible, "_Now?_"

So it seemed. I gathered my courage, and my wits, organized myself a little, and let my fist go to the door.

There was only a second of hesitation before I knocked, just a second where maybe, possibly, my heart might've flashed a warning in front of my brain. You see, the heart _always _knows what's going on. But whatever it was, warning or no, I ignored it, knocked, and entered.

Nothing could've prepared me for the sight I saw.

Hojo opened his eyes, blinked, and pushed her away a little, looking surprised and slightly horrified. "K-Kagome?"

Kikyo stared fixedly at me from his arms. There I'd found them, Hojo, holding Kikyo by her upper arms before him, kissing her passionately as they stood together before his mirror. It was the very _worst _thing I could have seen when I opened the door.

For many awkward seconds I just stood where I was, rooted to the spot and completely frozen with my mouth a little open. My eyes were no doubt large and disbelieving. I'll admit I really didn't believe it, at first.

No one spoke, there was perfect silence. Inside my chest a firework-display of emotion was exploding, every one vying to force words out of my mouth or keep me statuesque. But amongst them all, came quiet experience. It let me know, that I'd done this before, that I'd been through the pain, and that the only thing for this now, this particular situation. I had to remain calm. I was an adult, I had to act like it, or fall to my doom.

"I-I'm sorry..." I said weakly, the tears gathering in my eyes, though I couldn't possibly let them fall, "I guess this is...a bad time."

Hojo was speechless, gaping just as I had been doing. His hold on Kikyo, however, did not falter, and she was the first to respond.

"Oh no," she said, with a smile that turned my blood to ice, "This is a perfect time, Kagome. You should know before anybody that we're in love," her gaze strayed up to Hojo's rigid face.

"I-In love?" I couldn't help the question from leaving my lips.

"Yes, completely in love..." Kikyo's voice was cold and almost emotionless. I knew instantly that it was a rouse, that whatever tiny bit of emotion expressed in her tone wasn't real. This was fake, it was fake for me, to hurt me. I could tell by the way she smiled in such a way, and by the way her eyes seemed to look down on me from a very great height.

But I couldn't say anything, and I didn't want to. The tears were moments away from leaving my eyes, I had no time, and I had no will. It didn't matter to me, anymore; because I knew...it was hopeless.

I bent my head to keep my eyes and their weakness from them, and said in a rushed, heated whisper, "I am very happy for you." Then, I turned around and left the room, then the hall, at a run.

........

My head hung low to hide my tears from the rest of the world, I stormed out of the front doors of the building overcome with rampant emotions. Truly, I wanted nothing more than to hate Kikyo, to explain to Hojo, and everyone else, just how horrible she was, just how malevolent she could be, just how much she deserved to be shunned as much as she had me. But for whatever reason, my heart wouldn't allow it. All I could see at that moment was what was in front of me, and what I saw was a pretty picture of romance.

Hojo was in love, I'd gotten the news straightforward, from a decent source. He was blissfully happy with the woman of his dreams, and all was right with the world. But that woman of his dreams wasn't me, and that was the problem. It was Kikyo. So she had thrown herself to him to spite me, big fucking deal. It made him _happy_; I couldn't do that.

But oh, did I want to... I wanted to so badly it hurt, and I had waited until the moment that my heart was shattered to realize it. Feeling ultimately doomed to unhappiness, I let the tears fall without the slightest bit of hesitation.

It was easy to think that fate was trying to tell me something, and judging from its choice of signs it was getting pretty frustrated with the little big girl who thought she could make a difference in someone's life. "_You can't _do _that," it said to me fiercely, "Don't even try falling in love! No one will ever love you back! Just take the hint and quit..._"

I stood alone under the street lamp in front of the theater, head clutched in one hand.

"_You're parents can't stand even seeing your face, that's why they stay away from you._"

Stumbling around, my sobbing quickly overcoming me, I grew exhausted and found my way to a wall where I leaned on it for support.

"_Your brother doesn't visit, he hardly even writes._"

My surroundings became a blur, I grew dizzy but couldn't cease weeping. Every time I tried my emotions would catch up with me and I would sink deeper into my own despair.

"_Your fiancé left you_."

Suddenly a voice called my name from right in front of me. I blinked dimly and raised my head a little, fingers furiously wiping away the tears from my eyes. First I saw the shadow of my visitor from the lamp's light.

"_You can't even admit your feelings to the one you love the most._"

I could hardly believe it, but not even my surprise could stop my tears from falling, and I continued on, even in his presence.

"_You don't mean anything to anyone_."

Sesshomaru stared down at me, looking completely unperturbed; except for his eyes. They shone with concern, glinting in the half-darkness. In my state of chaos I didn't once try to imagine why on earth he was there. _Him _of all people, it was just too bizarre to analyze. Too bizarre for me anyway, especially when I was too beat up to figure anything out besides the fact that I was suicidal.

While I was sniffling quietly, trying to get myself under control enough to piece together something decent to say to him, he began speaking to me. I only heard the first part of what he said; anything else was lost.

"Kagome," he began stiffly. He looked slightly put-off, even I could tell. I think he was uncomfortable knowing that he was going to have to actually _talk_. In a conversation. "Why are you crying." No question mark. Just order and obedience.

Fuck obedience, I wasn't in a good mood. So instead of answering him, I just continued to sob, and again my head went limp on my shoulders and he left my sight behind a curtain of my own hair.

The rest of whatever he said to me couldn't be heard, I was crying to loudly for me to understand anything else. Worn out, physically and emotionally, I didn't protest when he wrapped his arm around my shoulders, and guided my body toward his. He held me to him very briefly, still talking in soft tones, before we started to walk.

His hold didn't slacken once, even when my feet refused to cooperate and I tripped or when my legs failed me and I refused to move for minutes at a time. I didn't know where he was leading me, I didn't care. Eventually I quit struggling against myself and relaxed into him. Resting my head on his shoulder, I continued to cry.

Soon I found myself being coaxed into a car. It was Sesshomaru's, of course. Unlike the rest of us, he didn't rely entirely on taxis and trains for transportation. It simply added to his importance. A sleek, modern car for a sleek, modern guy. We, Inuyasha, me, Rin, fought constantly over who would get to ride with him if we ever had something to go to together. We were fascinated by personal cars...

The ride soothed me just a little, though there wasn't any clear sign of that. Though it did grant my strained muscles a little release, it did nothing for my emotional state. I kept on sobbing, what a surprise. Sesshomaru said nothing for the duration of the trip, which I soon found out was made back to my apartment.

He didn't quit there, didn't just drop me off to fend for myself and find my way up the steps. After I was lifted gingerly out of the front seat, and together we entered the building, my head resting again on his shoulder. As we came to my door, he tried the doorknob with one hand, my being cradled to him with the other, and found that it was locked. Futilely he knocked, but no answer. Inuyasha was out. I was just stable enough to understand what was going on, and pulled my keys out of my pocket.

Again, Sesshomaru didn't stop there. As I was still in tears, very heavy ones, he didn't abandon me, but helped me to my bedroom and set me down on the mattress. That was when I was truly astounded by his actions.

I felt him tug at my jacket, then my shoes, and naturally assumed that he was helping me shed some of my extra clothes so that I could sleep more comfortably. It wasn't until his fingers brushed across the strap of my tank top that I began to worry a little.

"What are you doing?" I asked so quietly that it was barely audible.

"You need to calm down," he said when I promptly started weeping again after asking him my question. "You're going to take a shower, to relax. I am helping you undress, as you're obviously too agitated to do so yourself."

I don't know why I did, but I just relaxed. I'd gotten my explanation, and though I was still slightly uncomfortable, I let him lift my shirt up over my head so that my torso was naked except for my bra. He worked at the clasp until it was loose, and immediately looked away as I simultaneously crossed my arms over my exposed upper half. When he saw my jeans, he hesitated, and I understood. I lifted myself carefully off of the bed and turned from him as he rose and made for the bathroom where I heard him prepare the shower.

In his absence, I finished the job of undressing myself. Never once, in the whole awkward affair, did I quit crying. I was weak, my heart had just been broken...again. I was simply pitiful.

Sesshomaru returned, pointedly not looking in my direction, with a towel in his arms. I took it, and wrapped it around my body; effectively shielding myself from his eyes.

The shower was an excellent idea. I stood in it for a long time, letting the hot water rinse away the evil experience I'd just had, so that all that remained were the painful feelings that had lost their bite. Reduced then to my somewhat normal, considerably more understandable self, I breathed a sigh of relief. But my troubles weren't entirely over; having been removed from my world of agony, I had to face reality. I had to face Sesshomaru, who I had a feeling was still in my apartment.

I didn't bother to dry my hair, just let it sit on my bare shoulders in dark, soaking clumps. When I was covered once more by a plush, fluffy towel, I left the bathroom twenty minutes later and tiptoed softly back to my bedroom. As I'd expected, Sesshomaru was standing there; he gave me a look that suggested he was relieved I hadn't killed myself while out of his sight for nearly a half hour. I smiled at him as I approached.

"Thank you," my voice was faint and raspy, "For taking care of me."

"What happened?"

A long sigh escaped my lips as my feet shuffled around lamely. He came to me in a few steps and guided me to the bed by my shoulders, apparently worried that I would burst into a wild bout of sobbing again.

Sitting there while he stood in front of me (the last bit of his dignity that remained refused to let him take a place on the mattress) I explained to him what had happened. I owed him at least that much for driving me home and helping me back to where I was then. Sesshomaru listened patiently, with no visible emotion and no comment. It was about the same as talking to one of my walls.

However, when I was finished, he _did _have something to say.

"He doesn't deserve you."

No hesitancy, no shame, he meant what he said and he didn't regret it.

I looked up at him with dark eyes that probably still had a black halo of eye-liner around them. Not knowing what to make of his statement, I calmly told him to sit down.

He stiffened.

"I mean it, sit down. I'm not talking to you about this while you're looming over me like that."

Sesshomaru was very disturbed by my sudden twist of attitude, and looked like he was considering snapping at me. I knew it was the last thing _he _wanted to do, but _I _wanted him to get down to my level.

"Don't take a chair," I said, when he glanced at the whicker one Inuyasha sometimes sat in beside me while I slept. "I want you to sit on the bed."

His eyes flashed, he curled his fingers into fists, but I wasn't intimidated. It really wasn't intimidating anyway, he was just confused and frustrated by my sharpness. It took him a little while, but he eventually took a seat about two feet away from me.

"Not like that," I said, irritated, "Get closer, I don't bite."

The distance shrank, and finally satisfied, I turned my icy gaze on him again rather coyly. "Now, what do you mean by that?"

"Mean by what," he responded darkly.

"When you said, 'he doesn't deserve you.'"

Again he went tense, his back got just a little straighter, and even without the lights on I could see the flicker of uncertainty pass over his face by the glint in his amber eyes. It was Sesshomaru's equivalent of "did I say that?"

I waited, he formed an answer that had to be given. He had to say something, the consequences of remaining silent would be far worse.

There was a swish of long silvery hair sliding over as his head turned towards me in the blackness. "What more would you wish me to say?" Taken off guard, I flinched, but he continued without an answer from me. "There is no other like you, Kagome," each word was said with deliberate slowness, "You are strong, and you are capable," he paused, "You are beautiful. He doesn't deserve you, if he would even think of choosing another."

A tiny, awkward silence ensued during which my entire body shut down for maintenance. The impossible was happening, the world was going to end, it was going to fall down right on my head. It already was.

I felt him place a hand on my bare shoulder, lean in, and whisper sternly in my ear, "I want you to call me tomorrow; so that I know you haven't killed yourself. Rin would be upset."

I didn't say anything, I couldn't. My mouth was dead, but he waited for me to speak anyway until he sensed that nothing would come.

"Goodnight." The hand left my shoulder, the mattress rose as he left it, and then he left the apartment. When he was gone, I continued to sit in silence for a while until I presently flopped down into the bed and slept with nothing but a towel on.

......

Holy shnikes, I'm tired. You know I don't think I've ever been _really _awake updating. Ever.


	11. I Know You

Hello it's me – hey, that's one of my favorite songs. Anyone familiar with The Virgin Suicides soundtrack? No/yes? Ah well, anyway...um, hi? Yeah. READ.

Disclaimer: If I _really _owned this, you wouldn't hear the end of it.

...........

Chapter 11-I Know You

.....

The next morning I was embraced in bedding at all sides and my towel was half off. I'm relatively modest at the weirdest times, so sleeping naked is definately a 'no.' Even waking up, completely covered in feather pillows and comforters, I gave a rather shrill squeak and bolted up and into the bathroom, a marshmallow of billowing white covers.

Inuyasha, having heard my call, came tearing in moments later, as usual. I was getting tired of that.

He hung around in front of my door, pounding it with his fist until I emerged, draped cleanly in a fresh towel. His yellow eyes wandered past me. "Why are all your covers in the bathroom?" he asked plainly.

"My business," I snapped, and was supremely grateful that he didn't poke the subject further, because I had that uncomfortable morning-after feeling you get when you cry uncontrollably, and I was sure that, given time to remember the evening, I'd start all over again.

On my way to my closet, leaving a befuddled Inuyasha in my wake, I did indeed feel the prickling of fresh tears stirring in my eyelids as I brushed over my personal disaster. And then...with a start of surprise, I remembered even more...

"_Sesshomaru_," I gasped as I made to pull open my wardrobe. It was barely even a whisper, but he heard it anyway, and nothing in the world could have possibly kept him from investigating.

"Sesshomaru? What about _Sesshomaru?_" he said icily from behind me. There wasn't much hunger for gossip in his voice, more protectiveness. _Over_-protectiveness.

But it was early morning as far as I was concerned, I was a twit, I looked like I'd aged ten years, it'd been a rough night, and I didn't hear him; I even forgot he was there, and my thoughts continued to dictate what my mouth said, unfortunately for me.

"Oh my _God_," I shrieked, "I let him _undress _me!"

And _that_, was when the heavens parted, and rained down its great and terrible wrath _right _on top of my head.

"YOU, **_WHAT?!_**"

The only plus of the situation being that he'd finally gotten my attention, so I didn't have to worry about my mouth going berserk without my knowledge, I felt the icy hand of doom upon my shoulder, and turned around as slowly...as possible.

By the time I'd gone the full 180 degrees, he was staring down at me from his considerable height, inches from my face, practically breathing fire.

"Oh..." I said in a trembling voice, "It's not so bad...I mean, it's not what you think." I'll admit I wasn't so convincing for an actress. What should have been a period at the end of my sentence actually sounded more like a question mark.

"_Really_," he hissed. I don't think that I'd ever seen him so furious. His eyes were narrow slivers of burning yellow, and there was a certain rigidity about him, with his folded arms and straight jaw, that made him seem like an animal about to attack.

"Um..." My hand tightened fearfully on my towel. This was my death, I knew it; I could feel it.

"Tell me what happened," a single arm uncurled itself from in front of his chest and pointed, straight as an arrow, at the bed. "Sit. _Now_." Familiar.

I scurried past him and obeyed, eager to tack a few more seconds onto my life.

"_Speak_."

And then a little spark blew up deep down in me, the very tiniest spark. I sure didn't feel rebellious, but I was a bit more confident; my voice didn't tremble nearly as much as I thought it would.

"Remember Hojo?"

The answer he gave came through gritted teeth. "Yes."

"I thought I would like to give a relationship with him a shot – now, _don't _get mad," I said hastily when I saw the look on his face, "Er...mad-_der_." I took a breath, and went on, "I stopped in front of his dressing room when I was leaving the theater to say something, and walked in on him and Kikyo practically making out. Nevermind, they _were _making out."

"Who the fuck is Kikyo?"

Another swell of confidence, that was very quickly engulfed by the well of sadness that erupted inside of me. "Kikyo is..." Tears. Would he care that I was crying, when I said it, if I did? Would he get that look on his face that made him seem out of place? ...Or would he still dwell on Sesshomaru?

"Kikyo is Hojo's current love interest," I said dejectedly, my head sagged, I closed my eyes.

"Well I can tell _that_."

"You don't understand – "

"Obviously."

I gave him a foul look and continued, "Kikyo's been my rival from day one. She hates me, and she's even told me that herself. When I walked in on them I knew from the look on her face that Hojo doesn't mean anything to her..." my voice grew softer, "She probably just waltzed in after the rehearsal and threw herself on him. She's just using him to get to me...probably because I got the part, an amateur, and she didn't."

He seemed to consider my speech for a moment, then looked slightly abashed; some of the ferocity left him. "I'm sorry..." he said, "What does all of that have to do with Sesshomaru?"

"Well, when I saw them, I got a little...emotional."

"Big surprise."

"Will you quit interrupting me?" I snapped. He rolled his eyes. "...As I was saying, I was crying my eyes out and when I left the theater I met him."

"Met him? You guys had a date planned? And you were trying to go with Hojo?"

"No!" A brief sigh of frustration, then, "I just found him out there."

"He was waiting for you?"

I shook my head slowly, "I have no idea. All I know is that he talked to me, and helped me into his car, and drove me home."

"And then you had sex with him. You..."

"_No!_ I just let him undress me!"

Again with the narrow eyes.

"Um...partly. He just took of my shirt and bra okay?"

"You're not making things any better for yourself."

"He said I should take a shower!"

"With him?"

"_NO! _By _myself! _He was just helping me out of my clothes because I was hysterical! I hardly knew what was going on! And to be honest, I don't even care."

"So you're saying he saw your upper torso naked and you don't give a shit, is that right?"

"_I covered myself well enough._"

His look was skeptical, but he let it go. "Fine. Then what happened."

"I took the shower, and he did _not_ watch or violate me in _any way_, and then – "

"And then?"

I paused, memories of just what happened next flooding into my brain at a rate that I could hardly keep up with. All I knew was that the information I had received during the night should be kept from Inuyasha at all costs; at least for the time being. Who knew what he would do with it. Hell, I didn't even know what _I _would do with it.

"...He was gone, but he left me a note asking me to call him. So he can make sure I'm okay," I replied, thinking quickly.

Thankfully, he bought it. "So what are you going to do?"

"Call him, of course! He drove me home, it's the least I can do."

"Drove you home _and _undressed you, all for some phone sex, what a deal."

"INUYASHA."

........

He was banished from my room with threats following him about breaking a chair over his head, so that I might be in peace to phone Sesshomaru. But just to prevent him from listening on the line or putting an ear to my door, I pointed him down the hall towards Miroku and Sango so that he could spread the news he'd just heard about my nightly excursion with his brother, while I used my cell phone and locked myself in my bathroom; just to be safe.

With my address book laying open on my lap, I dialed Sesshomaru's number with a trembling hand with the skylight shining down on me faintly. I made a note of just how long each individual ring felt to me as I sat in the bathtub, shower curtain drawn and every light off.

"Kagome." It was his cold, silky voice all right. No mistaking it; or the resolute tone.

I felt my heart rate excel. "Yeah...um, you got it." A strange silence followed, I broke it, seeing as it was obvious he expected me to talk. "I ah...I haven't killed myself. Heh, yet."

"I'd prefer you didn't." He wasn't the type of person who appreciated sarcasm, at least in situations like ours.

"Oh, don't worry...Just kidding..."

"Are you all right."

"Me? I'm fine, I'm fine... Thanks."

"You don't sound like it."

It was perhaps the worst moment to make a strange noise, but I did, by kicking on the water by accident with my foot. Hey, it was dark. I couldn't see. But that strange noise was _nothing _compared to what unavoidably came out of my mouth when the iciest water _ever _came bearing down on me from the showerhead. If I'd just turned the water on from the taps, that would have been fine, but not the _shower_...

"SHIT! FUCK, THAT'S _COLD!_ HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WHAT THE _FUCK!_"

I scrambled to get out of the tub, landing with the grace of a dead sea lion being pitched off a tall cliff on the cold tiled floor devoid of the bedding I'd removed from it earlier; drenched in freezing water and still spewing obscenities into to the cell phone that had miraculously survived the onslaught of ice and was still very much on.

And then, just to top off the disaster, several glass bottles of something, lotion maybe, fell off the top of the cupboard I'd bumped into on my way out of the bathtub and crashed loudly on the floor. I can only imagine what all of this must have sounded like to Sesshomaru.

...And I can only imagine what my face must have looked like when I realized I was still talking to him.

Strange, awkward quiet. For the second time that day, I tried to think fast, and failed rather miserably.

"Oh, um...whoops? Clumsy me..."

"What _happened_."

"You know you sound a lot like your brother, WAIT! I DIDN'T MEAN THAT!"

"_Answer me._"

"...I tripped?"

"Not good enough."

"It's nothing, really, I just...fell out of the bathtub."

"Why."

"I turned the water on. It was dark, I couldn't see."

"Why was it dark."

"I'm hiding in the bathroom. To avoid spies."

Man, it just got better and better.

He must have been trying to process the absurdity that was coming for me, because there was a very long period of time – again – during which no one said anything.

And then, his conclusion.

"You are going to meet me in twenty minutes in front of your apartment."

"Sesshomaru, I get the feeling you don't trust me. But you do, don't you?"

"Absolutely not."

"...Oh...well then, do I have a choice?"

"No."

"Oh, okay, just checking. See you in twenty minutes?

"Yes."

And then he hung up. I reached behind me to massage my head, and then fumbled for a light switch. It was going to be no easy task finding my concealer to hide the bruises that were no doubt swelling in the mess I'd made.

.............

Then twenty minutes later...

Well actually it was more like thirty, I was so flustered that I couldn't quit falling over just about every single thing; and Sesshomaru noticed.

I saw him immediately, leaning rather elegantly against the side of the building, right next to the doors, waiting for me. Several young ladies that happened to pass by while I approached him giggled to themselves annoyingly.

_'Har har bitches...if only you knew how much stress he's causing me' _I thought darkly to myself.

"Where did you get those bruises," he asked calmly.

"I can't believe you haven't noticed already, but I'm not really the most graceful person in the world," I folded my arms, "Enough said."

It was small, slight, but very much there, and to me it seemed like a wild grin; he rarely smiled. "Perhaps we should adjourn to some place rather more comfortable."

It was rather surprising, as I hadn't really expected him to hang around more than ten minutes, just to see if I was indeed, okay. But here he was watching me quietly, obviously desiring me to agree.

And I did. It couldn't hurt, could it?

We walked together in rather tense silence for a while down the street, until we turned and I suggested that we head to a café not far away to get something to drink.

"It's a nice place to...talk," I said.

"Sounds fine," he replied.

So we walked some more. Walked...and said nothing, me just a little ways ahead so that I could steer him in the right direction. Because I can't handle uncomfortable bouts of quiet, and though I was pretty sure he found them agreeable, I spoke up just as we were coming upon the café.

"It's funny..." I said softly, "How everyone thinks I'm suicidal. You, Inuyasha...even Miroku and Sango have hinted at it occasionally."

"You don't come off as such, but your actions would suggest otherwise."

"That's 'somewhat' reassuring."

"You will agree with me that you often make choices that make your state of mind seem questionable to others?"

If it had been coming from anyone else, I'd have been pissy and defensive; but oddly, I wasn't so irritated. I even laughed.

"Yeah, I guess you're right...But I just can't help it sometimes, you know? I mean since, since Kouga, I can't really feel the same way I used to about, well, anything really. It's made me do things I wouldn't normally do."

He didn't hesitate when I said Kouga's name, even though he knew very well all about the whole thing. "I'm sorry for that."

"It's okay. It's no big deal anymore, I guess."

"It is."

"Oh?"

"No one should expect you to recover so quickly after something that defines the way you lead the rest of your life occurs. And you shouldn't expect it of yourself either."

I was surprised, a little blush touched my cheeks. "Thanks, it's nice to hear that."

A nod was the only response I got.

At about that time we came to the café, and no more was said about Kouga or my bleeding heart.

It was a nice enough little outing, we talked rather comfortably with each other, and I was given a rather forceful opportunity to better explain what I was doing with the lights off in my bathtub as I was talking to him. I decided that Sesshomaru wasn't as stoic as I'd thought, and apparently, so did he.

He asked for me to meet him again sometime in the next few days...seeing as I was so blatantly suicidal. After all, _someone _had to keep track of what I was doing, and certainly not such a volatile gossip as Inuyasha.

As I was leaving to go back to my apartment (I politely declined his offer to walk me back), we cleared something up.

"Sesshomaru?" I said, feeling completely unsure of myself but unable to resist the urge to ask the question that had been swirling around in my head since I'd stepped out of my apartment building.

He turned and regarded me with his golden eyes, prompting me to continue.

"This isn't...this isn't a.... I mean, you don't think it's a... Well, you don't, do you?"

Another very very slight smile. "If it bothers you, allow yourself to think of it as a meeting between friends."

I returned that very very slight smile. "Okay."

...........

Sorry...In a strange mood. Requiem For a Dream does that to you. Holy shit, I know what _my_ anti-drug is. Review responses and story reccomendations next chapter, promise.


	12. I Walked With You

Insert Clever Introduction Here

P.S.-"**LOVE**" the new spacer between sections because fanfiction's being a bitch.

Disclaimer: Not yet.

LOVE

Chapter 12-I Walked With You

LOVE

I went back; despite everything, I went back. I guess it was something of pride. I couldn't really let Kikyo see she'd gotten to me, could I? And besides, if I left, who would play Juliet – _her?_

Couldn't possibly have that.

So I went back, and it was terrible. Although my fellow actors frequently told me how well I was focusing and how smoothly my lines came, I was about numb from the neck down. Whatever emotion I had was manufactured and came straight from my lips, not from my heart, and ironically I always thought that's where acting talent was supposed to come.

Perhaps it was the fact that Kikyo never missed an opportunity to flirt with Hojo, to kiss Hojo. And Hojo himself, sheesh, what an enigma. I let myself believe that he was truly desperate, or maybe that he'd had his heart broken like mine and instead of caving in he snatched at any chance he had, thinking it might be his last.

It was cruel of him to toy around with me though, even if that wasn't his intention at the time. Again, another possibility was that he was just a really nice guy, and Kikyo had no doubt poured her heart out for him; maybe he felt he had no choice if he wanted to keep her from bursting into tears.

But that was silly, because then why hadn't he been a really nice guy and remembered how he'd been for me? I sure did. I remembered all the coy glances, all the blushing and stuttering and pussy-footing around. Most of all I remembered his face close to mine when we'd been moments away from sharing a first kiss the day I hurt my foot, and then the real thing when we'd done our first practice as Romeo and Juliet.

Men. For me, at that time, I was noticing a distinct trend of them shooting some attention my way and then finding a more worthier candidate. I wasn't opposed to the idea of lesbianism, so I was about five seconds away from joining the other side just to spite the male race.

And I knew that I couldn't handle chasing after Hojo anymore when we kissed again in the second rehearsal; because it was devoid of love, it was devoid of passion, it was awkward and stupid. It felt like Hojo was wondering what to do next, hoping I might tell him, and I knew _I _was waiting for it to end.

When we broke off all the other actors gathered had a sort of strange, single look on their faces. Like, "what was that?"

So I wouldn't; I decided after that icy kiss that I wouldn't chase after Hojo anymore. That was just what I did, too.

LOVE

Poor Yukari, she was baffled. I remember the tentative knock on my door after the second rehearsal.

"May I come in?" she asked timidly from behind the wood.

"Yeah, I'm here," was my dreary reply.

She slipped around the door, and seemed relieved when she saw that I had no unnecessary visitors. But that was over quick when she apparently remembered what she'd come for and how hard it would be to bring up the subject.

I noticed this, and did it for her. "It's okay, they make a good couple."

Relief again, and a little pain, "No they don't."

That drew a small, dry laugh from me, and I turned away from my mirror, "No," I agreed, "They really, really don't."

Then we both laughed together, and meant it. It wasn't an awkward laugh, we were being honest with ourselves for once. But when it was over, it was back to reality.

"Are you going to be...okay?" she asked sweetly, "Don't pretend that you weren't shocked when you saw them snuggling all over the place today."

"Oh yeah, sure, I never knew Hojo was such a fan of PDA, but it was nothing."

"I said, _don't _pretend."

I smiled slyly, "But you don't understand, I've already done my crying for him."

She looked mildly surprised, knowing that I had something up my sleeve. "You didn't know until today though; I didn't _see _you duck out to the bathroom or anything..."

"Yeah? Guess who walked in on them making-out in his dressing room?"

Her eyes widened, "You _didn't! _When?!"

"Mmm, after the first rehearsal," I took a deep breath and leaned back with my eyes skyward, preparing myself visibly for the telling of a strange story. "I was all ready to say something to him, I'd been coaching myself, and I saw that he was in his room when I was leaving the theater. So I thought, 'now's as good a time as any' and waltzed in, only to find them holding each other and doing what they apparently do best."

"Wow..." she muttered in awe.

"Oh, but it gets better. Hojo didn't say a thing, but she was all ready to tell me that they were in love, and gave me this look and this smile... She's using him to get to me."

"What? How do you know?"

"Kikyo's always been testy about me. When I first tried out to be here she spoke out the most against me, and when I was early for the auditions for this show she took me aside and told me how incompetent and horrible I was."

"Holy shit."

"You got it. I'm sure it was the straw that broke the camel's back when I got Juliet."

"That's awful," Yukari said, looking mortified and disgusted. "I wonder what would make her hate you so much..."

"I think she just hates competition. She was the star of the show before I got here, am I right?"

"Oh yeah, she always got leads, was the envy of every girl and the object of desire for every guy – except Hojo."

"Well I don't exactly have her reputation; I'd hardly call myself 'an object of desire,' or envy for that matter, but for a while I _did _sort of have Hojo."

She snapped her fingers, "And you were so close!" Then a glint came into her eyes, "So what do you intend to do?"

I blinked, "What do you mean?"

"To get him back! It's just like a teen movie!"

"Excuse me?"

"You know! The underdog always wins the guy!"

I grinned, "Yukari, you have an abysmal imagination."

She was persistent, "But that's the way it's _done_; you have to steal him back."

"I'm not stealing anyone. She can keep him for all I care. I mean, he seems happy."

"But it's not true love!"

"According to him it is, and if they can keep the charade up between them then more power to 'em. It's good that he's feeling...good. I'll even indulge Kikyo with some pining and broken-heartedness if that's what it takes for her to be a nice girlfriend for Hojo."

"That's awfully noble of you, in the wrong way."

"What?"

"I still think you should try to get him back."

I could practically feel the blood rushing up to my cheeks when I remembered another step in the equation.

"Oh? And what's that for?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"That blush! I've never seen one like it."

At that I turned around rather sharply, back to my mirror, and kept my eyes pointed sternly to the ground.

"Absolutely nothing. You're imagining things."

I really _didn't _know what I was blushing about. It made no sense.

LOVE

I was getting very sick of make-overs. It seemed that every few months the universe frowned down on me and decided it would re-arrange my life. I wouldn't necessarily feel so put-upon if I was being consistently reminded of how bad my luck was.

A few months back I'd had the imaginary finger of truth pointed in my face when Kouga had clearly explained how I wasn't enough for him. The bonus was that someone else was, and I got to meet her and her unborn child.

Swell.

Next, fate nudged me in a more traditional direction, and I revamped my wardrobe; however, against my will.

Okay, after that, just when I'm getting used to things, all things bright and beautiful get tipped upside down again. I watch my would-be boyfriend make-out with my arch nemesis, and then I endure one of the most awkward experiences I've ever had being undressed by my best-friend's brother.

Bizarre, but the best part is that the whole "awkward experience" wasn't really all that awkward. In fact, besides the initial shock the next morning, I didn't have much trouble looking back on the occasion.

The evidence of this being that I had no problem at all leaving my apartment four days later to meet the older brother in question for a check-up of sorts; except Inuyasha, but he doesn't count. He's _always _a problem.

And I didn't really leave my apartment _that _easily.

"Move." I side-stepped again, making toward the door. Then, his hand came out of nowhere.

Well, I was close.

He tightened his grip on my wrist menacingly. "_I'm _not letting you go out!"

"No one asked for your opinion. Leggo."

Inuyasha was no longer Inuyasha. He was a collective mass of pulsating energy; buzzing, not thinking. He knew I was going to ask him why he wouldn't let me out, and in the meantime he was dodging around the subject as best he could.

"...No!"

We glared at each other in the doorway for a second, and then I got a crafty look in my eye; Inuyasha must have seen it, because he bowed his head apprehensively and tightened his iron hold on my arm even more.

But that was just what I wanted him to do, and without a second more spared to consider my options (and they were few), I stooped down quick as I could and promptly sank my teeth into his forearm.

"OW!" He withdrew cursing and sputtering, while I threw open the door and ran for it.

Being the persistent little bitch that he is, Inuyasha tore after me, and was gaining ground fast. Yet despite his impressive speed, I managed to give him the slip as I ducked into the elevator with a teetering old lady.

As the doors closed on his furious face I waved cheerfully, "See you later, Inuyasha!"

"I'm not letting you out again," he shouted, "You can't do this to me, I live with you!"

"Don't I know it. We'll resume this conversation when I get home." Then, as an afterthought, I yelled through the very last crack between the sliding doors, "IF _I _FEEL LIKE IT!"

His screeching followed us down two floors before it finally faded away. The woman I was riding with smiled at me shyly as we waited to reach the ground level, and I beamed right back at her. Then, just because I felt like strengthening my reputation as a psycho amongst the elderly, I started doing a little dance to the elevator music.

As the doors opened again I half-expected to see Sesshomaru staring coldly at me, which would have made me jump out of my skin and no doubt my fellow traveler would have had a fatal heart-attack; he had a strange talent for catching me doing who the hell knows what at my very strangest moments.

It was a relief when I saw that he wasn't, and I skipped out happily into the lobby. Through the double-doors was a beautiful day, though not by my standards. Sunny, pleasant, cheerful, and not a cloud in sight.

I frowned.

It was a little known fact amongst my friends and family that I didn't prefer sunny days. I know I should've, from what they told me, but I didn't.

"Kagome, you're always so cheerful."

"Kagome, your hair looks so pretty in the sunshine!"

"Kagome, you're such a flower-child!"

"Kagome, you're just sunny all the time!"

Etc.

Maybe it was just recent events that spurred me to prefer dark days at the time, but I'm pretty sure that I've been rather more fond of rainy days all my life. My hair might look pretty in the sunshine, but it looks lovely when it's sopping wet. I'm _not _a flower-child, and I'm sunniest and most cheerful when I'm hopping around in a thunderstorm.

It's just a fact.

So I glowered, and shuffled my feet around, but decided not to take a taxi. Hell, I wasn't completely foreign to walking once in a while.

I had great intentions, but it was a bad idea anyway. Sure, five miles isn't so bad, I said. Fuck that. Under the hot New York sun? Ha.

But I'm stubborn, so even when I was dragging myself along and fanning my face with a book I'd found in my purse, I didn't call a taxi, and I didn't collapse in a café to buy a bottle of water. No sir, I wanted to rough it.

LOVE

"You're late."

"Really?" I flopped down on a bench, like a freshly cut tree, and let my face get mashed into the panels of wood. "I'm sorry."

"How sorry?" He asked me from where he stood next to a pond, staring down at me benevolently.

"Not...very... Hey, think I'll be disturbing the wildlife if I go take a dip in that pond?"

Sesshomaru didn't answer. I wasn't looking at him, but I imagine he was again trying to fathom my absurd behavior.

"Oh come on," I continued, voice muffled by the bench, "It'll be fun. You can come too, we'll go skinny dipping."

Again, no answer. I patted the part of the bench that wasn't occupied by my face. "Sit."

"You're not really in a position to direct me anywhere."

"I sure am," I said with mock outrage, "What do you want me to do? Physically force you to sit? No, I'm too tired. You'll have to settle for verbal command."

I think he may of laughed, in a cocky way. But that's really wishful thinking. It was more of a "Heh," and that hardly qualifies. Even so, I _did _get him to smile once. Kinda.

Even more surprising, he actually did what I said. When I felt his weight settle beside my head, I shifted onto my back and looked up at him with my hands resting on my stomach.

"I don't understand you," he said stoically.

I blinked, "Join the club. You, Sango, Miroku, Inuyasha, Rin, Shippo...um....me. ...Why, does it bother you?"

"It frustrates me, occasionally."

My brow furrowed, I made a face and said, "I'm sorry, I'll try to make more sense," and I was actually being sincere, too. I wasn't _completely _oblivious to the trouble I caused other people with my spontaneous, head-in-the-clouds periods.

He raised his head and looked out over the pond where some swans were gliding idly by. "No," he said, "I'd rather you didn't."

I shrugged nonchalantly, "Whatever you want."

"Why are you so exhausted, may I ask?"

This enticed a smile from me, it wasn't like Sesshomaru to be so polite and forgiving. It made me wonder what had brought on the change. "I walked. It's who knows how far from my apartment to this park. And, it was hot, and...I didn't stop anywhere to take a break."

"Do you do such things often?"

I laughed. "Probably a quarter of my entire life has been spent in a taxi. Even though it was tiring, I think the fresh air will prove its worth over the next few days."

"You forget you're in New York. There is no 'fresh air.'"

Again, I snickered, "Oh yes. Who knows, I may have just boosted my chances of getting lung cancer."

"The price you pay."

"For what?"

"For being stubborn."

I sat up sharply, and his gold eyes rested on me when I did so. "_Me?_ You think _I'm_ stubborn?"

The eyes narrowed in a teasing way. "You are. What you mistake for stubbornness in me is actually a sense of command."

I snorted in a very unfeminine way, "No kidding. A very, very _strong _sense of command," then I folded my arms. "Call it what you will, but I've already determined that stubbornness runs in your family and I won't be convinced otherwise."

"Would you then settle for it being 'persistency?'" he said appealingly.

I grinned. "Look at us...we're both so stubborn that we're having an argument about it."

He tilted his chin downwards ever so slightly so that he was looking up at me imploringly. "You didn't answer my question."

"Well..." I watched him closely for a few seconds, "I wouldn't really call it persistency. You don't have to be persistent. You just say it and it's done."

A look of triumph crossed his features for a split-second.

"What?"

"Then you agree that it is a strong sense of command."

My eyes widened slightly when I realized my defeat, and then I waved my hands around in the air above my head frantically, "This conversation is pointless! You're _firm_, okay? You're firm, that's it." Then I flopped back down on my back, and saw him appearing amused above me, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Now seriously, what about that pond? Think anybody would care if I just dove in for a second?"

LOVE

I remember Inuyasha's face very clearly when I opened the door and crossed the threshold a little while later. You can tell something's up with him when you know that he's furious but he does his best not to show it.

Stony-faced and livid with rage, he was standing just a few feet from me with his arms folded and his back straight.

"Why is it so dark in here?" I said, trying to act innocent and pawing around for the light switch. "For effect?" He'd drawn all the curtains and all the blinds, and every appliance was turned off. Inuyasha was a sucker for drama; mostly because of me, because he'd realized early on that pure presence wasn't enough to intimidate his room mate, so he had to go the extra mile.

"We need to have a talk," he said darkly. I could see his silvery hair glinting in the shadows. His eyes did not need to glint, they practically glowed. Like little satanic lamps.

I couldn't find the light switch, oddly, so I crossed the living room and made for the drapes; I could feel his stare following me.

"Okay," I replied, throwing back the curtains, "But first let's get a bit more light in here."

Moving around the room, and into the kitchen, inviting natural light in, I continued to try to keep up my naive facade. "So, what would you like to talk about?"

He didn't answer.

"We can't talk if you won't talk back." I finished with the windows and returned to the living room. "Come on, what's on your mind?" My jacket was removed, and I left again to hang it in the closet, after which I paced calmly to my bedroom to stow my purse away.

He had since shifted a little to watch me fuss about, even though I never saw him move an inch.

"You remind me of a statue," I said as I finally settled down on the couch. Inuyasha walked toward me and halted abruptly in front of my face.

"Won't you sit?" I asked sweetly.

His reply was short and venomous. "I'd rather stand, thank you."

"Suit yourself," I shrugged, "Now tell me what we need to talk about."

"You."

"Me?" I gestured to myself.

"Don't act so coy," he bit out fiercely, "Don't you respect me more than that?"

"Okay..." I nodded slowly, "You're being serious..."

"Of course I am. What the fuck do you think you're doing?"

My hands came up in defense of myself, "I'll stop messing around, really! I'm serious, I'm serious."

"Not. That."

"Well what then?" I scolded, "You tell me not to be coy and here you're deliberately keeping me in the dark!"

Inuyasha then sighed, and I felt something big coming. His shoulders sagged, he closed his eyes and took several deep breaths before returning to me in a far more subdued manner. "Why are you getting involved with my brother?"

Shocked, I stared at him bizarrely. "I-Involved? You mean us...meeting?"

He looked sad, and desperately tired. I sensed he'd lost some sleep on the subject, and immediately felt a pang of guilt for having yelled at him.

"Yes."

"Inuyasha..." my voice was soft, "I'm not...I'm not, _seeing _him."

"Well then what _do _you see him for?" He asked tragically.

"It's not like that at all!" I replied, "Sesshomaru just wants to make sure I'm okay."

Inuyasha made a disdainful noise. "Why would he do that?"

"I don't know!" I said, feeling cornered again, as so often happened, "Maybe he just – " I stopped suddenly, having caught myself at the last moment.

But it was in vain, he finished for me. "Cares about you?"

"That's not possible," I said, my previous calm flooding out of me swiftly.

"Kagome, he's cold, but he's not emotionless."

"No," my voice was rising shrilly little by little, "He said Rin would be upset if something happened to me, he's just making sure I'm – "

"That's what _I'm _for. Sesshomaru knows we live together," he interrupted, "He can ask me anytime about how you are."

"But..." I said, "He wouldn't dare think that. He's not a bad guy, but I'm...well, I'm your best friend, and it's no secret that you guys don't like each other always."

Inuyasha shrugged, "Maybe he's jealous of me."

"What?"

"Maybe he's jealous because I get to spend so much time with you."

I could hardly believe what I was hearing. "Inuyasha! Listen to yourself! Sesshomaru doesn't... It's just ridiculous," I breathed.

He gave me a knowing look.

"Okay, what makes you think he does?" I countered.

"He undressed you, for one thing," he said sourly.

"That was an accident and you know it!"

"...Well, I don't know how to explain this, but it's like you're a whole different subject to him, Kagome."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. I'm his brother, after all."

I lifted a couch cushion and screamed as hard as a I could into it. When I reappeared from it's plush comfort, I saw that he was seated next to me, looking crushed.

"Suppose...I believe you," I said. "Why would you have a problem with us?"

"Sesshomaru isn't the type of person to be sincere. I've seen how he treats his girlfriends."

"Yeah? How?"

"Never gives them the time of day," he said wistfully. "I always feel sorry for them. Rin's the only one he's ever been devoted to."

"Inuyasha, I've seen how he acts around Rin, and he does not act like that around me."

"Well, she's his _sister_, you know."

"And what am I? His...his _girlfriend? _Absolutely not."

"Oh?"

"Yes. In fact, we've already discussed this very thing. And we've already decided that we aren't dating." I hugged the pillow close. "Maybe he thinks of me as a sister."

"You know, just because Kouga and Hojo were stupid enough to choose other people doesn't mean that every male in the world suddenly won't have feelings for you."

"I know that. But that doesn't make what you're saying true."

"Whatever lets you sleep at night."

LOVE

Short chapter, yes I know.

Review Responses from past...um...since chapter nine, yeah? If I mess up and respond to you all twice, you will laugh and be joyful, so it doesn't matter if I do.

Yes. On with the show.

Addanc-TSC: Wow. You're peppy. I don't think I've been as energized as you in about...ten years. And the best part is, you're energized about little old _me._ I can't even begin to express how truly flattered I am, but this is kind of bad because now I don't take nothin' from no one anymore. Just like... "Did you just say _'hello' _to me? Are you insane? I'm the best writer _ever_. You can't say '_hello_' to me like you're my _equal_."

Hoshi-chan1: Dude! I know TWO insomniacs now! I'm glad I could help, get some sleep.

BlueDove: You can be a total ditz sometimes you say? Yeah well...you and me both. Thanks for reading!

bittersweet-memory: It's so cool that you think Inuyasha is rather neat as a gay guy, and that you think Sesshomaru belongs in New York, because there are cats that weigh more than the number of people who generally agree with me. (I stole that from David Sedaris...if anyone but me knows what I'm talking about.)

Kiki Smythe: Is someone a Sesshomaru/Kagome fan...? Hm? Yeah you are.

Malfunction: Joy! Someone says they're reading my story recommendations! YOU HAVE HAPPIFIED ME.

acrimsonnight: Ooo...I'm so glad you're having a good time reading this, my comrade. It's grand that you've seen The Virgin Suicides, because I'm obsessed with that movie/book/soundtrack and constantly make little references to it. As for your question about what Miroku could've been saying at the party, that's for me to know.

...And you to find out... I guess...

I will divulge this, yes, that part you asked about was foreshadowing. You already know that now though, HA HA. Don't get too hasty though, either. _Who knows _who the couple will be.

Oh yeah, I DO. _Shnikes_, I'm so..._wicked_.

Chibi-Midnight-Sakai: Thanks for reading, I'm so glad you like it!

Rosebark: Ah, ah, ah! Don't get ahead of yourself now... It might be Sesshomaru/Kagome...It might not...you never know... Thanks for reading!

Peenya Kowlada: Now really...Hojo is so terribly dull. Why did you want him to really get together with her? Not to say that they won't, or that they will, for that matter. But honestly, what's the appeal? He's so soft. To clear things up, what Kikyo did was basically burst into Hojo's dressing room and start gushing her heart out for him about how she "loved" him. She was faking of course, and yes, to hurt Kagome. It was lucky for her that he responded the way he did, otherwise her plan to crush her enemy would have gone down in flames, and done nothing more than make things only slightly awkward. Sorry if you were disturbed by the undressing scene, we're just supposed to assume that she was drunk on her own misery and didn't have a clue as to what was going on.

LOVE

Story Recommendations:

Everything by psycho pixie. It's all I have time to list.


	13. Once Upon A

Oh. **OH. **BOO-FUCKING-_YA_. LOOK WHO UPDATED?

Woosh!

LOVE

Chapter 13-Once Upon A

LOVE

Regardless of what Inuyasha had to say, I continued to...to...meet? Look at? Join up with?

Whatever, the point was, I wasn't _seeing _him. But I kept seeing him. See?

I didn't know quite why. Every time we were about to go our separate ways, one of us would suggest we meet again. We didn't exercise our creativity trying to think up nifty excuses; it was always something related to my health and how Sesshomaru should keep track of it.

And we never questioned the dates we set. The day, time, and place came out all in one breath and we agreed on it immediately. If there was a problem in one of our schedules, we wouldn't change the date, we'd simply move our previous engagements around.

Inuyasha was still nervous about it, and once or twice he might even tag along. Those days were particularly strange, and it was then when I noticed the progress Sesshomaru and I had made the most, because it contrasted so greatly with what I'd once thought "normal." See, we were actually getting rather comfortable around each other, but when Inuyasha was around...it was back to the same old routine.

I had to sit between them every time, glancing back and forth anxiously between the two. Like cats in a bag, though they rather reminded me more of dogs. You expected Sesshomaru to growl deeply once in a while, and Inuyasha to hiss in a very canine way.

I couldn't understand what they were fighting about. Well, Inuyasha, sure, but Sesshomaru really had nothing to prove. I blamed it on pride. Whether they admitted it or not, they both had profoundly huge egos.

...Meanwhile...

Practice was getting...easier, which surprised me. It was usually my habit to sink deeper and deeper into my depression before I actually rescued myself. Yet here, I didn't have to do a single thing.

One day as I was packing my stuff up after a rehearsal, I stopped right where I was and came upon the startling revelation that I'd recovered almost completely from the Hojo/Kikyo thing without much trouble at all. Sure, it still stung once in a while to see Kikyo cuddling into Hojo, but I was annoyed, really, not _hurt_.

Yukari, however, seemed to be a bit more worse off than I was. She seemed dispirited, discontent, and altogether distant. I did my best to cheer her up every so often; I took her to movies or clubs or restaurants and got her to laugh or got her to get drunk with me, etc., etc. But I never asked why she seemed so down, because I sensed she did her best to avoid the subject, whatever it was. And at the end of every outing, I knew I hadn't helped as much as I'd wanted to.

LOVE

I don't know how I did it, but I convinced Sesshomaru to go to the beach with me. It was a nice long drive, but I just got up the morning that he wanted to see me and said to myself, 'hey, the beach sounds fun.'

I timidly asked Inuyasha if he would like to come, seeing as we didn't often get to the beach in New York, but he gave me this hurt kind of look and turned my offer down. It was clear he was still very apprehensive about me being friends with his big brother.

Sesshomaru just sort of quietly growled his disapproval of the whole thing, but I managed to talk him into it, to my surprise. It was not too long ago that we'd had a talk about his 'sense of command,' and he was suddenly backing down at my suggestions.

I liked that.

The ride there was relatively silent; I got the feeling that Sesshomaru wasn't a big talker in the car, which was fine, because I wasn't either. I just watched the scenery go by, and sort of swept my finger along the window. It was very calm and serene.

It was a new thing for me, being so comfortable around Sesshomaru. For a while I'd been kind of nervous, but things got different in just a few days. I could talk to him pretty easily, I was used to his attitude, I had no problem at all being near him.

LOVE

"Take your shoes off."

He gave me hard look.

"Oh come on," I said gently, "It's really nice, haven't you ever felt the sand between your toes?"

"Yes."

"And?"

"I did not enjoy it."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh please. You're just saying that to frustrate me, aren't you?"

His eyes narrowed. "No."

"Well fine then," I said, and began trouncing off toward the distant shoreline, "I'll just have an excellent time without you."

I could just barely hear his shoes shifting the sand aside as he followed me, and after about a minute I spun around, glaring fiercely. "Take them off."

Sesshomaru didn't respond, he merely gave me _that look_, and expected me to back down.

"Don't be so difficult! Just take your shoes off!"

Again, no answer.

"You obviously haven't been to the beach for about ten years. Honestly, sometimes you're such a child, Sesshomaru."

Silence.

"OKAY." Fed-up, and with a mighty war-cry, I ripped around as fast as I could and dove towards his feet. It was time to attack the shoes and take them off _myself_. Sesshomaru seemed baffled for a moment as I began wrenching at his footwear, and then did something I didn't anticipate.

Softly, he pried me off, stepped back, and took them off himself.

"Are you satisfied?"

I grinned broadly and stood up. "Very," I said as I brushed the sand off of my knees.

Then I turned around and began walking off again to the water. The weather channel said it was too cold to swim, so neither of us had brought a suit. We just planned to sit.

Once we'd reached the shore, we stood together, admiring the view of the sun over the ocean. It was a moment of silence for both of us, again, but we liked those moments. Time to watch the world go by a little.

After a while though, a subject came into my head and I decided to bring it up.

"I remember when I first met you," I said distantly. "Do you remember when you first met me?"

"Tell me about it," he replied.

I smiled sadly. "You don't remember, do you?"

"Tell me."

I leaned back, feeling somewhat disappointed, and stared up at the sky. "Well...I was with Inuyasha, of course. We were only there to see Rin," I told him, wanting to strike back a little, "We were just in her apartment, kind of planning to go out together, but it was hard, because she wasn't old enough to go everywhere, at the time."

I paused, remembering further, just to myself. It was only a second, but many thoughts came back to me.

It was just us, in her living room, half watching T.V., and half talking and deciding. Rin was next to me on the couch, and Inuyasha was in a big chair near us; guarding the remote like a dog would guard its territory.

"Movie?" Rin suggested.

I looked up from Oprah, "We go to movies a lot, you know."

"Yeah..." she said, tilting her dark brown head downwards, "But there's something I really want to see that's out."

"What?"

"Ringu."

"_What?_"

She smiled, "It's some horror movie from overseas. They're doing an American remake of it or something so somebody decided to throw it out to a few theaters. Really small ones."

"What's it about?" Inuyasha asked, his eyes never leaving the screen.

"Um...Horror? Wait, I think it's something about a...possessed...video...tape." Rin looked befuddled.

"Well how did you hear about it?" I asked.

She considered the question for a moment, then said, "I think I heard about it from... Oh yeah! From one of your friends, Sesshomaru!"

"Sesshomaru...?" I mumbled, and suddenly realized that her eyes were looking past me. I experienced the uncomfortable 'knowing' feeling that comes to you when you know someone's standing behind you, and turned around slowly.

When I first laid eyes on him, I jumped and let loose a small, frightened yelp. My only view was of the upper part of his legs, but once the initial shock of seeing someone who seemed to just magically appear wore off, I raised my eyes until they were level with his.

His face yielded a not-so scared reaction.

I remembered that I'd froze, instantly. I think he did too, because there was just a moment when we'd locked eyes and neither of us moved. He was looking at me, and even though his stare was level and kind of cold, I could see the surprise in his eyes, and something else, maybe admiration, and...as silly as it sounds, desire. Not like he wanted to throw me down and go wild or anything, but more like he just wanted to touch me. Again, not in a weird way, almost like he thought I wasn't real for a second.

Meanwhile, I was dumb-stuck. I'm not shy to admit that he has beautiful eyes. I said earlier that I don't really fall all over the place when he's around, not like other girls, but I have no problem saying he's a rather lovely male specimen. Sesshomaru has a wonderful color scheme going on; pale-ish complexion, the amber eyes, the long, silvery hair. It's nice.

"That's Sesshomaru," Inuyasha said from the chair. His burning eyes flicked over to his brother momentarily. "You know about Kagome?"

"No." His voice was nice too, if not a little blank. I detected a bit of loathing in it, and wondered if he was naturally bad-tempered or that was just for Inuyasha. I later found out it was a little bit of both.

"H-Hi," I mumbled. "I'm Inuyasha's friend. W-When did you...get here?"

"Oh he came in just now," Rin said, "Didn't you hear him?"

"No..."

"Yeah, he's the quiet-type. Aren't you, Sesshomaru?"

He looked passively over at Rin, "There isn't always a need to speak."

She nodded as if he _hadn't _just given her a coy insult. "True, true."

"How...do you guys know each oth-" I stopped suddenly and pointed at Sesshomaru, "You look like Inuyasha! I mean, you're different, but... Are you related?"

"Lamentably," Inuyasha said.

"Inuyasha!" I reprimanded.

"Of course," Sesshomaru growled, once again glaring at Inuyasha.

"We're brothers."

I stared at him, "_Brothers?_ You have a _brother? _Why didn't I hear about this before?"

Inuyasha shrugged, "It wasn't worth mentioning."

I gawked at him, then turned back to Sesshomaru, feeling oddly hesitant. "I apologize for your rude relation." He didn't respond, just looked deeply at me, so I introduced myself a bit more formally. "It's nice to meet you."

He nodded, and I felt very small under his gaze.

"Continue." His voice woke me up from my memories with a start.

"Oh...." I said, taking a moment to gather my thoughts. "Okay, well... You snuck up on us. You snuck up on _me_,at least."

He half-smiled. "Did I frighten you?"

"Very much," then I laughed a little. "It was like you came out of nowhere. I wasn't expecting you at all. Remember you ended up going to the movie with us? You're so protective of Rin."

There was confusion on his face for an instant, but it returned to normal very quickly. "I remember it."

"The movie?"

"Meeting you."

It was ridiculous, but I couldn't help but blush. "I see. Well you were pretty unforgettable yourself. I was tempted to ask you if you were a male model."

He gave me a rather quizzical, belittling look.

"Now don't look at me like that!" I exclaimed, "You're attractive and you know it."

"You are as well."

I blinked, and just looked over at him. He was staring down at me from his great height, and I saw a strange look in his eyes. He seemed apprehensive but yearning. I could tell he wanted to say something or do something, but either he couldn't decide if it was wise, or if it was acceptable, or who knows. I noticed that his face was a bit closer to mine, and thought maybe that I'd looked over at him just as he was about to do whatever he was hesitating about.

It was a long time we stayed like that, just standing; then I suddenly remembered his remark and summoned a reply. "Thanks, that's nice of you to say."

Sesshomaru then looked away quickly and stared at the water. "You're welcome."

Somehow I felt that I'd offended him, and smiled warmly attempting a fresh subject. So we stood on the beach, both with no shoes, letting the water lick our toes on the shore, and talked like nothing had happened, but something did, we just didn't know quite what, exactly.

LOVE

When the world falls down on your head, you feel it, and you know what's going on. You have enough sense to know when things are going badly, and you have enough sense to act on your feelings; whether you're calm, you're angry, you're violent, you're afraid, you absolutely know that this is really truly the end of your life. When the world falls down, you're a different person tomorrow, it's a fact.

I knew when the world fell down.

What I did _not _know, however, was when the world decided it would piece itself back together haphazardly and set me up for inevitable despair. I'm smart like that. But if you were in my position, would you have seen it coming either? True love wields powerful persuasion, that's all I have to say.

It was a hard practice. It really was. Kikyo pulled her last card out on me, and I just let loose.

"Why are you _doing this?_"

We were alone of course, locked away in a nice tight space to gouge each other's eyes out with grapefruit spoons. It was a lucky chance that we ended up alone too, because I couldn't hold it in anymore. Sure I wasn't all about Hojo anymore, but it still burned to know that she was just guiding him around. Hojo was a nice guy.

She hesitated, and then shot back, "You deserve it."

"What about him?! How can you just do this to Hojo?! You don't mean it, I know you don't."

See, we were the last ones out. All confrontations and dramatic events just happened to take place after practice, and it was just coincidence that I saw her snuggling with Hojo in the hall before they parted ways. She making for the west exit, and he walking straight ahead to the north.

Kikyo narrowed her eyes and smiled in a horrible way, "You should. I was really hoping you weren't that incompetent."

I just gaped. For whatever reason, it was just a deciding moment; and I decided that, so what if Hojo wasn't my love interest? He was still my friend, and he had a right to know.

"_People like you aren't supposed to exist!_" I hissed, and you have admit I was right. Evil people really aren't natural. You can't be that terrible.

"And yet I still do."

It happened like this: she turned, and caught sight of me gaping at her, my eyes straying to the retreating Hojo. I'd been in the shadows of the scene, and they were rather too preoccupied anyway to notice me. She flashed me the most stinging, conceited grin I'd ever seen in my life. I returned the blow with a look of revulsion, and stormed off in Hojo's direction with obvious intent.

But before I could get anywhere, a slender, firm hand snaked out of nowhere and clung almost painfully to my upper arm. Kikyo then spun me around, and dragged me away. I didn't protest, I wanted just as badly as she did at that moment to finally battle it out.

She threw me into an open practice room, much like the one I'd auditioned in, and shut the door gently. When she turned around to face me, who was furious, she folded her arms rather serenely and glared at me.

And the rest of that blink in time is history.

"Why do you do this?" I moaned desperately, "How can you use _him _against me?"

"Because I can, and because you deserve to be exposed to the consequences of pretending you're a worthy idol of admiration. You are nothing to be admired."

"Look who's talking!" I spat back at her, "The lowliest type of person in the world, who plays around with _real people_ who have done _nothing _to her."

She looked slightly hesitant for a second. "Apparently you don't understand. You need to be educated about your _place_."

"I DON'T CARE. I don't, I don't, I don't," I was practically screaming then, "I get it, all right? _I get it. _I'm a terrible actress, I'm a terrible person, I stole everything away and I'm so selfish and greedy and stupid, OKAY!"

Kikyo only scowled more and remained darkly silent while I went on.

"HONESTLY, I've been taught my lesson, but if you think I'm going to back down because of your 'necessary' taunts, you've got another thing coming. That said, there's no reason for you to act abnormally horrible, even for you, by messing with Hojo when you don't mean a thing. He deserves better than that."

"Possibly..." she whispered in a sinister fashion, "But haven't you considered that he's happy with _me?_" She stressed the "me" part, so I'd get the point.

I swallowed apprehensively, "Yes."

"So if you care so deeply for him, why not leave him as he is? In love?"

"He's not in love," I bit out.

She seemed to be containing triumphant laughter as she spoke, "Yes he is. I would know."

"Oh," I hissed, "Of course you would," and then I performed my heroic move for the evening by running straight out the door and slamming it closed behind me, hot tears coursing down my face.

I wasn't lying to myself, I'd finally proved the fact that I was better than that, but when you see a friend being fooled with like that, and you know they're happy ignorant, the frustration is staggering.

I wanted to shake Kikyo and hit Kikyo and drive her face into the ground and roar into her ears how vile she was. I couldn't understand how I could suddenly become so violent, and that made things even worse. It was so disturbing, and so I cried to relieve the mounting tension.

Fearing going outside into a sea of judgmental New Yorkers, I ran to the commons area, where the cast usually loafed around and rehearsed lines when they weren't performing. It was just a nest of armchairs on carpet, with a small table and T.V. in the corner. When the carpet ended, the tiles started, and we had a little kitchenette area at our disposal.

The commons area was the first place that popped into my head, so I tore into it and threw myself toward an especially dark corner and onto the counter-top. There I stood, crying my fury out in the blackness of a room that's been cleaned up and shut down for the night already. It when on like that for a while, until I heard the door open a ways behind me, and saw light pouring in before my eyes from the illuminated hallway.

"Go away!" I sobbed, standing rigid and gripping the counter stiffly.

The person did not leave, but instead shut the door and I heard very slow, deliberate, advancing footsteps.

"LISTEN," I automatically assumed it had to be Kikyo, "WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? DO YOU WANT ME TO QUIT THIS? WOULD THAT MAKE YOU STOP? WHAT!"

"Kagome..."

Take a moment and imagine the impossible. Then apply it to reality. Multiply your reaction by about ten times, and you'd have what I felt when I turned around...

And came face to face with the man whose ring I'd dropped down a gutter just about four months ago.

"K-Kouga?"

LOVE

Oh. Cliffhanger! Yes, that was me. I did that. It's moments like these that I truly feel just how _powerful _I am.


	14. hi

Listen...this is hard business, but I have to delete all my stories. Not because anyone reported me, not because I hate them, I just have to. For a brief amount of time. Okay? I'm making a new screen name, I'm forming a new account. I'm reworking a few things.

Someday I'll tell you all why, but for now just please trust me. Expect things to be shut-down indefinitely for about a week or so, and then I'll put everything back up again. Perform searches for it, if you still are interesting in reading.

Thank you all so much.

-Me.


	15. Chapter 15

Okay. So I didn't have to terminate my account. But something obviously _did _happen, right? AND IT WAS BAD. Hence the initial delay.

I moved out of my house four years ahead of schedule, with five months' notice. I made the decision myself, that was good, but it didn't excuse me from how much of a shock it was. And then when I got over that, I realized that it was hard work. And then when I got over that, I made friends with beautiful people and devoted free time to being a hot-blooded teenager with them. It was fun and I have no regrets. Thus, no, I _did not _die.

Naturally after exams, several of which kicked my ass, I wanted to simmer and sulk. I've been doing that for the past few weeks. Seeing as I now have free time that can't be used to roam around with my friends because they live far away from me, I promise (_promise_) I'll start working on my stories again. But I have a sibling about to leave for Europe for six weeks straight on a painting expedition for college, so if you all don't mind I think I'll bid her farewell first.

And I might have updated once or twice if I didn't know that the security at my school had the power to hack into my system and read whatever went down from personal experience.

My plan is to finish these off one by one. However, if I don't accomplish this before September...well, the cycle starts again. The end.


End file.
